nocti

My wife muttered "another celebrity death then" only moments ago. I asked who, and as she said "Robbie" I admit that I began to feel the pangs of ecstasy, and even a shred of tumescence down below. Unfortunately, turns out it's Coltrane. Who I actually quite liked.

For those suicidal hangovers, where you feel like you've spent the night being pegged by Lisa Riley whilst someone played the drums to "In The Air Tonight" on your fucking head with a pair of cattle prods, Diazepam indeed does the trick. In the absence of that, however, Solpadeine always managed to sort me out quite a bit, with the codeine helping to give enough of a buzz to keep any of the shakes and sweats away. I always swore by Powerade during my "normal" ones. Never touched the stuff usually, but it seemed like quite a powerful elixir against the pure "drink-only" hangovers. Sounds like our Decs might need a few months in a fucking monastery.

I'll have a quick go. Hang yourself you latent homosexual.

Whilst the man himself has not been explicitly nominated, the adverts he appeared in were covered a while back...

"My name's Denis so I'm gonna pronounce it peh-fleh!"

Making ProfB look remotely sane is no easy feat. Nice work.

I once considered insinuating that Baws had the potential to be homosexual. The next morning I found a coffin made to my precise measurements delivered to my workplace, inside of which was a bottle of toilet duck, and a post-it note with my phone's MAC address, and "pile of shit" scribbled on it.

It could come in handy to corroborate any sexual abuse allegations.

Charles is a self-proclaimed perennialist so it will indeed be interesting to see how people behave around him, particularly the media. However, he is also a bumbling, balloon animal-handed twat; so I doubt many will take a blind bit of notice until the day his swollen corpse slides off the throne and baldy picks up the orb.

I'd like to think that you, Decs, know more than most that I'll be giving this shit a berth wider than that infuriatingly unfunny race-baiting cunt's ex-wife.

It's no longer on at the cinemas anyway, Baws.

Fuck off, we're full.

I'd be more mindful of your own, Panz. Your demographics are shifting at a much, much faster rate than England's. Giggle away at this. https://streamable.com/x2prge

That's like one of us lot placing ourselves alongside Palmer, Nicklaus and Hagen just because we blitzed a few crazy golf courses after an afternoon session on the trappist ales. The screeching clot-fannied dykes can all fuck off.

Get an avatar you cunt.

Huge fuss over fuck all. Some of these hysterical cunts need to peel their skinny jeans off and get some shorts on, buy some fucking deodorant, and shut the fuck up.

From what little I've seen online concerning this clearly traumatic ordeal, the vast majority of Brazilians are pissing themselves over it. The word appears to be rarely used as an epithet, and is actually rather affectionate in a 'naughty' kind of way; like one of us calling someone a "cheeky sod" or something similar. There are many other words he'd have used if he meant what people think he does, like "preto" (dark/black). One of their futsal players even goes by the name, and doesn't look excessively black to me. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neguinho To be honest, I'm glad that Hamilton is making himself look even more of an idiot as his light fades. He'll hopefully fuck off just that little bit quicker; the indignant closet cum-quaffing cunt.

I've seen so many stories lately where some thick cunts are basically saying "We're now having to watch how much we spend." I'm no fucking economist, but perhaps if they did that a bit earlier in life, the filthy troglodytes would be coping a little better with the situation they're in now instead of bin-dipping outside Morrisons.

"Mattesons"

This pair of repugnant cunt-chomping ham-planets can fuck off. They were probably kept waiting whilst the nurses fashioned gowns for them both out of numerous curtains throughout the wards; not to mention the time it must take for three beds each to become free so they could be pushed together to accomodate them, whilst they place just as much strain on the NHS as their own fucked organs. It's nobody's fault but their own that they could spend different currencies with each hand at the same time. The insatiable titans should be grateful somebody even mustered enough courage to communicate with them at all. Fat fucking bull dyke spastics.

Only on the Corner can you go from asking for opinions on a new Tom Cruise film, to coercing a sheep into losing its virginity. In just a few pages no less.

I once had a dream where I shat in her knicker drawer, shook it violently from side to side, then watched as she tried them all on. She seems a bit fucked in the head if you ask me.

Who was the stupid fucking cunt who attempted to provide an alibi for his claim that he was on some holiday or cruise, by going on some borderline schizophrenic rant and playing the role of several people complete with different fonts, etc? The user themselves were clearly forgettable, but that post was a linchpin of CC spasticity.

Forest Green have already made their stance on bottery very clear by serving vegan-only food at their ground.