Jump to content
Donations towards site upkeep will be thankfully received and faithfully applied....
Last Cunt Standing

Swan-baiting Canal Pushers

Recommended Posts

4 hours ago, King Billy said:

And at the very most?

Lock them in a cage for six months in squalid and harrowing conditions then skin them alive one by one so the other cunts can see. It needs to be done alive because the vile chinky cunts I'll feed them to like their meet fresh and terrified before sinking their buck teeth into it.

I'd then flamethrower the chinks 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
11 hours ago, Witheredscrote said:

Swans are known to have the same mentality as geese, and so the answer to your question is No.  I speak with some authority on the subject.

  Frank currently holds the World record for this pursuit.  He managed to retain a Cob, a Pen, and 5 cygnets in his rectum for 12 hours (and a bowl of corn to feed them) 

Unfortunately swans lack the agility, speed and level of violence typical of geese. Most unfortunate.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, White Cunt said:

Wasn’t it the one closed down for ongoing prostitution and drug dealing issues? And another qualitas shithole was just around a corner on Poland Street, called Toppers if memory serves me right, run by some cheesy Lebanese cunt, harassing blokes passing by. 

That’s the one. A proper gentlemans club where a normal bloke could go and relax. Pretty, friendly girls and booze which wasn’t watered down and only a bit more expensive than a local boozer and open till the wee small hours, which in the capital city was surprisingly unusual. Sorely missed.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
3 hours ago, Cuntybaws said:

Overwhelming apathy would be my guess.

Can apathy ever be overwhelming? When apathy is at root a lack of something, by the time it is approaching overwhelming, with its consequent implication of urgency and vigour, it’s surely called something else? Maybe I’ll write to Melvyn Bragg. He’ll no doubt tell me to fuck off too, but with more syllables than most.

Form a queue, knobheads. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
12 minutes ago, Last Cunt Standing said:

Can apathy ever be overwhelming? When apathy is at root a lack of something, by the time it is approaching overwhelming, with its consequent implication of urgency and vigour, it’s surely called something else? Maybe I’ll write to Melvyn Bragg. He’ll no doubt tell me to fuck off too, but with more syllables than most.

Form a queue, knobheads. 

Enthusiastic nonchalance?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
6 minutes ago, Last Cunt Standing said:

Too many letters to be a racehorse Eric, but I like the idea. 

'Shergar bum' is an anagram of 'hamburgers'.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Rum Red is an anagram of Red Rum

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
11 minutes ago, Matpow said:

I think the little cunt just took advantage when the guy had his back turned 

I think you're right. Welcome to the corner. Ignore the cunts on here who may advise you to drink bleach or jump in a wood chipper. Any aggro from any wankers, you just let me know. 

Eric.

 

 

 

Now give me all your fucking 'likes' 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
27 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said:

Redrum redrum redrum

That's my The Shining impression 

This is mine...

"HERE'S JOHNNY 5, input input input"

I might be confused.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
45 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said:

Redrum redrum redrum

That's my The Shining impression 

Redrum is murder backwards.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Just now, camberwell gypsy said:

Do they kiss in heaven?

Do you mean the famous benders nightclub in London? If so I would say there’s probably some of that going on. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
34 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

This is mine...

"HERE'S JOHNNY 5, input input input"

I might be confused.

'Hello Eric. Come and play with us. Come and play with us Eric. Forever........and ever......and ever". 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
17 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said:

'Hello Eric. Come and play with us. Come and play with us Eric. Forever........and ever......and ever". 

I'd kick a ball around and play Connect-4 with those creepy ginger kids if the alternative was shagging the bird in the bathtub.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, Eric Cuntman said:

I'd kick a ball around and play Connect-4 with those creepy ginger kids if the alternative was shagging the bird in the bathtub.

Nonsense! You'll always have the warmest of invitations for a spot of croquet on the lawn here, no need to waste your time with tedious board games and disturbing youth!

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
34 minutes ago, KingRollo said:

Nonsense! You'll always have the warmest of invitations for a spot of croquet on the lawn here, no need to waste your time with tedious board games and disturbing youth!

How kind! Your magnanimity is complemented pleasingly by your grace and nobility, your majesty. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
8 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

How kind! Your magnanimity is complemented pleasingly by your grace and nobility, your majesty. 

Why thank you young Eric.  I have been following the splendid example of @King Billy, a most generous monarch.  He's also agreed not to snitch on me over the matter of the gamey geese I purloined off a certain faux-french fowl-botherer, so I'd definitely say I owe him one.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
14 minutes ago, KingRollo said:

Why thank you young Eric.  I have been following the splendid example of @King Billy, a most generous monarch.  He's also agreed not to snitch on me over the matter of the gamey geese I purloined off a certain faux-french fowl-botherer, so I'd definitely say I owe him one.

I believe the frenchy obtained the cheese when he surreptitiously accessed the gardens of a Mr Pepys, armed with a spade and larcenous intention. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
5 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

I believe the frenchy obtained the cheese when he surreptitiously accessed the gardens of a Mr Pepys, armed with a spade and larcenous intention. 

400 year old cheese is surely too mature even for his acquired tastes? The filthy old sod...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Interesting. I see my comment has been deleted. I’m not expecting an explanation so don’t worry yourself Mr(s) Roops.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


×
×
  • Create New...