Guest MikeD Posted October 24, 2015 Report Share Posted October 24, 2015 If I may, the cunt is also, probably a master of one upsmanship? No matter what life experience you might share in his presence, he always has a better tale to tell, am I correct in my guess? Every conversation is turned into the I'm a total fucking cunt variety hour, and every unlucky bastard in the near vicinity is reduced to a head shaking soon to break mass murderer. The cunts should be introduced to the bark stripper. I know the type. You could tell him that your dog's got a massive dick and he'd say "my dog's got two dicks."I don't have a dog. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest nobgobbler Posted October 24, 2015 Report Share Posted October 24, 2015 I dived on to a grenade once to save my platoon and now I'm a ghost.Are you in my fucking wardrobe? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frank Posted October 24, 2015 Report Share Posted October 24, 2015 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest nobgobbler Posted October 24, 2015 Report Share Posted October 24, 2015 I worked with one such cunt when I was young. She was one of those who asked you a question and would then answer it for you before you've had chance to speak. And a fucking nosey gossip. I thought it would be fun to spin her a few ridiculous yarns (the more unbelievable the better) and see how long it would be before it was all round the company. The cunt sucked it up like a sponge. Sure enough, it boomeranged back in under 4 hours. "I was living with a married man, I never paid my rates, I was dealing drugs from the stationery room and I changed my identity after murdering my neighbour because he had liquidised my goldfish just because I had accidentally trod on his radishes". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted October 24, 2015 Report Share Posted October 24, 2015 I worked with one such cunt when I was young. She was one of those who asked you a question and would then answer it for you before you've had chance to speak. And a fucking nosey gossip. I thought it would be fun to spin her a few ridiculous yarns (the more unbelievable the better) and see how long it would be before it was all round the company. The cunt sucked it up like a sponge. Sure enough, it boomeranged back in under 4 hours. "I was living with a married man, I never paid my rates, I was dealing drugs from the stationery room and I changed my identity after murdering my neighbour because he had liquidised my goldfish just because I had accidentally trod on his radishes". I despise these gossiping cunts. If it wasn't for them I wouldn't be on the sex offenders register. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted October 24, 2015 Report Share Posted October 24, 2015 Gossip was so rife at one place that I worked, when I tried to spread the news that one of the cunts had given my mate a dose, (fact) it was treated as an unfounded and malicious rumour. I hated the cunt and spent years trying to make her look a twat Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Bill Stickers Posted October 24, 2015 Report Share Posted October 24, 2015 one of the cunts had given my mate a doseIs that northern speak for an sexually transmitted disease, or do people in your neck of the woods just give each other heroin in the workplace during particularly taxing shifts? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted October 24, 2015 Report Share Posted October 24, 2015 Is that northern speak for an sexually transmitted disease, or do people in your neck of the woods just give each other heroin in the workplace during particularly taxing shifts?He tod us it was green and chewed up his balls. He said "I think I'm a goner here" We sang "We wish you a merry Syphillis". Hope that clears it up. In northern rhyming slang, you would be referred to as " A Fujitsu Photocopier in a green bucket". That will teach you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted October 24, 2015 Report Share Posted October 24, 2015 He tod us it was green and chewed up his balls. He said "I think I'm a goner here" We sang "We wish you a merry Syphillis". Hope that clears it up. In northern rhyming slang, you would be referred to as " A Fujitsu Photocopier in a green bucket". That will teach you.Fascinating. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted October 24, 2015 Report Share Posted October 24, 2015 The return of our resident fantasist Frankape has got me reminiscing about some of the tall tales that have been relayed to me over the years with genuine straight faces. There was a boy I used to go to college with who was the king of this particular medium of cuntishness. These are some genuine stories he used to regale me with. Looking back, like Frank he was no doubt severely autistic, but also like him, it doesn't make him any less of a cunt.1:He once blew up a lecturers car using nothing but a firework and a drainpipe. And that was why said lecturer missed a Friday afternoon History lesson in April 2003.2: He wasn't going to university because he had been recruited to the SAS to become their personal fitness instructor. The fact that he failed all his exams was part of a plausible deniability cover up by the government.3: He once caught a Great White Shark off of Cromer pier. His line broke so he had to jump into the sea and wrestle it into submission with his bare hands.A cunt of the highest fucking order.Fucking hell that's amazing. I didn't know Cromer had a pier! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wizardsleeve Posted October 25, 2015 Report Share Posted October 25, 2015 Fucking hell that's amazing. I didn't know Cromer had a pier! I wish the fantasist cunt had gone into the sand head first at low tide. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted October 25, 2015 Report Share Posted October 25, 2015 I worked with one such cunt when I was young. She was one of those who asked you a question and would then answer it for you before you've had chance to speak. And a fucking nosey gossip. I thought it would be fun to spin her a few ridiculous yarns (the more unbelievable the better) and see how long it would be before it was all round the company. The cunt sucked it up like a sponge. Sure enough, it boomeranged back in under 4 hours. "I was living with a married man, I never paid my rates, I was dealing drugs from the stationery room and I changed my identity after murdering my neighbour because he had liquidised my goldfish just because I had accidentally trod on his radishes". She must be fucking daft, everyone knows you don't deal drugs from the stationary cupboard, you use the photocopier room, the noise covers up the punishment for none payers... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
colonelkurtz Posted October 25, 2015 Report Share Posted October 25, 2015 Fucking hell that's amazing. I didn't know Cromer had a pier! I'm working down that way next week ... I'll check it out ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest nobgobbler Posted October 26, 2015 Report Share Posted October 26, 2015 She must be fucking daft, everyone knows you don't deal drugs from the stationary cupboard, you use the photocopier room, the noise covers up the punishment for none payers...Or the Janitor's store, useful for mopping up the blood and with a bit of skill and ingenuity get them to bleed straight into the bucket. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gong Farmer Posted November 3, 2015 Report Share Posted November 3, 2015 Any cunt that says he wouldn't shag Katie Price is bullshitting cunt. I know I would. She looks like she could be utter fucking filth in the sack and I can't imagine any self respecting red blooded bloke passing up the chance of perving out with the filthy looking strumpet. For free mind. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Alfie Noakes Posted November 3, 2015 Report Share Posted November 3, 2015 Any cunt that says he wouldn't shag Katie Price is bullshitting cunt. I know I would. She looks like she could be utter fucking filth in the sack and I can't imagine any self respecting red blooded bloke passing up the chance of perving out with the filthy looking strumpet. For free mind.I have seen her when she was shopping near to where I live, when she hasn't trowelled on the foundation etc she is nothing special. So no I wouldn't! But then I am married to a Sophie Raworth lookalike. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Posted November 3, 2015 Report Share Posted November 3, 2015 Any cunt that says he wouldn't shag Katie Price is bullshitting cunt. I know I would. She looks like she could be utter fucking filth in the sack and I can't imagine any self respecting red blooded bloke passing up the chance of perving out with the filthy looking strumpet. For free mind.fuck me!,your musical tastes are a lot better than your carnal ones,It's a fucking rotter and I wouldn't touch it with yours Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
White Cunt Posted November 3, 2015 Report Share Posted November 3, 2015 Any cunt that says he wouldn't shag Katie Price is bullshitting cunt. I know I would. She looks like she could be utter fucking filth in the sack and I can't imagine any self respecting red blooded bloke passing up the chance of perving out with the filthy looking strumpet. For free mind.I must disagree with your opinion. Some of us require some decent intellectual content within the person dated. Not just good looks (which is subjective too). I can't imagine having sex with an attractive she-cretin, thank you very much. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest luke swarm Posted November 3, 2015 Report Share Posted November 3, 2015 I must disagree with your opinion. Some of us require some decent intellectual content within the person dated. Not just good looks (which is subjective too). I can't imagine having sex with an attractive she-cretin, thank you very much.To be fair WC I don't think the majority of us would be interested in having any kind of meaningful dialogue with Ms Price, .....that would be a fruitless endeavour. she would be utilised for other more physical pursuits.I think you are mistaking her for what Eddie would call a "keeper". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted November 3, 2015 Report Share Posted November 3, 2015 (edited) Any cunt that says he wouldn't shag Katie Price is bullshitting cunt. I know I would. She looks like she could be utter fucking filth in the sack and I can't imagine any self respecting red blooded bloke passing up the chance of perving out with the filthy looking strumpet. For free mind.I've seen the "videos" of her... her shagging potential is about the same as her IQ.... honestly... I think shagging the local lampost would be more fun.... Edited November 3, 2015 by DingTheRioja Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest luke swarm Posted November 3, 2015 Report Share Posted November 3, 2015 I've seen the "videos" of her... her shagging potential is about the same as her IQ.... honestly... I think shagging to local lampost would be more fun....but she has a child bearing mouth. are you sure you wouldn't Ding ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest yariman Posted November 3, 2015 Report Share Posted November 3, 2015 I've seen the "videos" of her... her shagging potential is about the same as her IQ.... honestly... I think shagging the local lampost would be more fun....I remember seeing a video with her being shagged in it (my ex used to download shit porn from Kazaa or whatever it was called...). She was as mechanical being given, what did look like a very uninspiring, fuck as she is in her interviews. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest luke swarm Posted November 3, 2015 Report Share Posted November 3, 2015 I remember seeing a video with her being shagged in it (my ex used to download shit porn from Kazaa or whatever it was called...). She was as mechanical being given, what did look like a very uninspiring, fuck as she is in her interviews.err that site your ex husband used Yazzer.......what was it called again?, just in case I put it into my search by accident Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Ahriman Posted November 3, 2015 Report Share Posted November 3, 2015 She must be fucking daft, everyone knows you don't deal drugs from the stationary cupboard, you use the photocopier room, the noise covers up the punishment for none payers...Fuck school, you don't get anymore educational then this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest deebom Posted November 3, 2015 Report Share Posted November 3, 2015 Miss Price was a fucking stunner in her younger days, but then she started on the surgery and now looks like a halal chicken. Shame really. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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