camberwell gypsy Posted September 6, 2016 Report Share Posted September 6, 2016 When nicking lead from church roofs, don't wear a dress or sandals. This will save you from slipping off and spending 6 weeks on remand in a police cell. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted September 6, 2016 Report Share Posted September 6, 2016 44 minutes ago, colonelkurtz said: All this coffee bollocks is fecking laughable. We have a lass in our workplace who's kid brother declared his ambition was to be a barrister. Ma and Pa were delighted at the prospect. It was all " Oohh .. we can just picture you in that wig and gown at the Old Bailey - we'd be so proud of you "." Naah " - came the reply - " I wanna work in Costa makin coffee .. like , yer know .. be a barista thingy " I sussed the punchline out as soon as you mentioned 'barrister'. But good effort. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest luke swarm Posted September 6, 2016 Report Share Posted September 6, 2016 15 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: Yeah because 999 takes ages to dial. it does when you are blinded by hot water.....did not think it through did you cunt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted September 6, 2016 Report Share Posted September 6, 2016 Isn't there a coffee bean that is worthless till it has dropped out of a monkeys arse, then it is worth zillions. For that double arsified taste, if it is a male monkey, get Keith Vaz to ram the beans back up with his todger. I drink instant coffee because for an all action super hero on the go, there is no time to fuck about. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Ollyboro Posted September 6, 2016 Report Share Posted September 6, 2016 5 hours ago, Punkape said: Blue mountain from Jamaica is the best coffee but expensive. The preferred choice of Ian Fleming also.... Poor cunts drink instant. I thought the warm liquid you enjoyed swallowing was sourced from Nigeria, Spunkiedoodledandy? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted September 6, 2016 Report Share Posted September 6, 2016 9 minutes ago, Ollyboro said: I thought the warm liquid you enjoyed swallowing was sourced from Nigeria, Spunkiedoodledandy? And that's dropped out of a monkey's arse first, too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Hector Posted September 6, 2016 Report Share Posted September 6, 2016 Only cunts, wankers and French twats drink coffee. I drink tea. It's the British way, you know. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Hector Posted September 6, 2016 Report Share Posted September 6, 2016 Tosser Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Earl of Punkape Posted September 6, 2016 Report Share Posted September 6, 2016 33 minutes ago, Hector said: Only cunts, wankers and French twats drink coffee. I drink tea. It's the British way, you know. Peasant. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Piston Posted September 6, 2016 Report Share Posted September 6, 2016 14 hours ago, Lady Penelope said: The water must always be boiling. Temperature matter not. Fact is: Instant coffee: brown shite. Hot shite, cold shite, boiling shite. Always shite. BUT there is worse: Decaffeinated instant coffee:Shitier and fucking pointless-ier. AND THEN there is.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest I know that Cunt Posted September 6, 2016 Report Share Posted September 6, 2016 12 hours ago, luke swarm said: a nonsensical statement as one cannot stick ones head into a coffee cup or a kettle....the correct way to ascertain that the water is indeed hot. is to throw the water in ones face.....this will not only wake up the coffee drinker but will correctly check if water is indeed hot enough. Have you forgotten about the effects of the zika virus? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest luke swarm Posted September 6, 2016 Report Share Posted September 6, 2016 1 minute ago, I know that Cunt said: Have you forgotten about the effects of the zika virus? I see your point.......so to check if your water is of the right high temperature required for a decent brew.......dip your new-born babies head into the kettle.......mmm..might just work Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted September 6, 2016 Report Share Posted September 6, 2016 7 hours ago, luke swarm said: it does when you are blinded by hot water.....did not think it through did you cunt. You still have to locate the button. And don't call me a cunt. Cunt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest luke swarm Posted September 6, 2016 Report Share Posted September 6, 2016 1 minute ago, camberwell gypsy said: You still have to locate the button. And don't call me a cunt. Cunt. quite right...it would be hard to locate that button...unlike finding your button Gyps. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted September 6, 2016 Report Share Posted September 6, 2016 25 minutes ago, Piston said: Temperature matter not. Fact is: Instant coffee: brown shite. Hot shite, cold shite, boiling shite. Always shite. BUT there is worse: Decaffeinated instant coffee:Shitier and fucking pointless-ier. AND THEN there is.. That's the old label. Deemed racist because it has the Indian as the servant, it was changed to show the seikh and officer sitting next to each other as equals. Manky was fucking furious. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest luke swarm Posted September 6, 2016 Report Share Posted September 6, 2016 5 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: That's the old label. Deemed racist because it has the Indian as the servant, it was changed to show the seikh and officer sitting next to each other as equals. Manky was fucking furious. the above label is factually correct......it is one third world cunt serving another third world cunt a cuppa. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted September 6, 2016 Report Share Posted September 6, 2016 33 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: That's the old label. Deemed racist because it has the Indian as the servant, it was changed to show the seikh and officer sitting next to each other as equals. Manky was fucking furious. It's worse than you think! Spunkers will be engorged, er, I mean enraged. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rick_B Posted September 6, 2016 Report Share Posted September 6, 2016 Camp coffee is certainly worse than you think. A girl at work used to drink it and it smells and tastes vile. The Sikh guy on the original label got a lucky break - he didn't have to drink this revolting crap. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted September 6, 2016 Report Share Posted September 6, 2016 11 minutes ago, Rick_B said: Camp coffee is certainly worse than you think. A girl at work used to drink it and it smells and tastes vile. The Sikh guy on the original label got a lucky break - he didn't have to drink this revolting crap. Talking of revolting crap, anybody heard from Decs today? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted September 6, 2016 Report Share Posted September 6, 2016 51 minutes ago, witheredscrote said: Talking of revolting crap, anybody heard from Decs today? I have nothing further to say. Adieu. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest deebom Posted September 7, 2016 Report Share Posted September 7, 2016 Coffee is for poofs and forriners. Which one are you Pen? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted September 7, 2016 Report Share Posted September 7, 2016 19 minutes ago, deebom said: Coffee is for poofs and forriners. Which one are you Pen? Definitely not French, we are an intelligent people, probably Welsh Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Lady Penelope Posted September 7, 2016 Report Share Posted September 7, 2016 Cymru am bith Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Lady Penelope Posted September 7, 2016 Report Share Posted September 7, 2016 13 hours ago, Rick_B said: Camp coffee is certainly worse than you think. A girl at work used to drink it and it smells and tastes vile. The Sikh guy on the original label got a lucky break - he didn't have to drink this revolting crap. My alleged mother drank nothing but this revolting mix of treacle and coffee Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Hector Posted September 7, 2016 Report Share Posted September 7, 2016 19 hours ago, Hector said: Tosser 19 hours ago, Punkape said: Peasant. I pre-empted you, Punkape. Tosser. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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