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Great Crested Newts


Guest Lady Penelope

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Guest Lady Penelope

They don't wash

They're not white

They don't work for a living

They never make their own ponds .. simply move into one that is already there

They don't pay council tax

They sometimes grow very large and move to swamps in Florida and eat people

They never smile or tell jokes

They never have names

The don't carry any documentation

They crap anywhere and don't use the rest room

No Great Crested Newt would ever be allowed to be a member of my golf club

..... So why the fuck are they protected? .. cunts

 

 

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1 hour ago, Lady Penelope said:

They don't wash

They're not white

They don't work for a living

They never make their own ponds .. simply move into one that is already there

They don't pay council tax

They sometimes grow very large and move to swamps in Florida and eat people

They never smile or tell jokes

They never have names

The don't carry any documentation

They crap anywhere and don't use the rest room

No Great Crested Newt would ever be allowed to be a member of my golf club

..... So why the fuck are they protected? .. cunts

This is a trap, right?

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Guest Alfie Noakes
17 minutes ago, Manky said:

We are all God's children.

No I am not, fuck off! Fucking stone age bollocks. We are made of atoms from exploding stars, provable fact, not written man made fiction and much more beautiful idea than vengeful yaweh the destroyer (Jewish, Christian and Muslim god), who made us to worship him according to religious freaks.

Edited by Alfie Noakes
bad punctuation
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8 minutes ago, Alfie Noakes said:

No I am not, fuck off! Fucking stone age bollocks. We are made of atoms from exploding stars, provable fact, not written man made fiction and much more beautiful idea than vengeful yaweh the destroyer (Jewish, Christian and Muslim god), who made us to worship him according to religious freaks.

We are stardust, we are golden. You old fucking hippy! :lol:

Carl Sagan was a cunt.

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Guest Alfie Noakes
Just now, Cuntybaws said:

We are stardust, we are golden. You old fucking hippy! :lol:

Carl Sagan was a cunt.

Yes but better to watch than Professor Brian dumb it down Cox.

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9 minutes ago, Alfie Noakes said:

No I am not, fuck off! Fucking stone age bollocks. We are made of atoms from exploding stars, provable fact, not written man made fiction and much more beautiful idea than vengeful yaweh the destroyer (Jewish, Christian and Muslim god), who made us to worship him according to religious freaks.

The lord will forgive you for this, even though he knows you are a cunt.

Made from bits of exploding stars? You have been watching too much Star Trek

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Back on topic, our site of 7 new houses was I danger of not progressing when one morning a couple of hippy cunts with blue plastic gloves and test tubes informed us that if newts piss dna was found in a small pond at the back of the plots we would be stopped from building.

I know they're are some low life human scum out there but when newts are higher in the pecking order than people I think the world is fucking fucked

Fuck newts,they're usually pissed anyway

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50 minutes ago, neil298 said:

Back on topic, our site of 7 new houses was I danger of not progressing when one morning a couple of hippy cunts with blue plastic gloves and test tubes informed us that if newts piss dna was found in a small pond at the back of the plots we would be stopped from building.

I know they're are some low life human scum out there but when newts are higher in the pecking order than people I think the world is fucking fucked

Fuck newts,they're usually pissed anyway

Bucket of bleach or diesel into the pond that'll solve the problem of them scaley flipper footed cunts 

Panzerknacker 

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11 hours ago, neil298 said:

Back on topic, our site of 7 new houses was I danger of not progressing when one morning a couple of hippy cunts with blue plastic gloves and test tubes informed us that if newts piss dna was found in a small pond at the back of the plots we would be stopped from building.

I know they're are some low life human scum out there but when newts are higher in the pecking order than people I think the world is fucking fucked

Fuck newts,they're usually pissed anyway

Did you ever manage to get your Tesco 2-berth tent setup? 

Nobody cares about your past or present, but I am concerned about your future.

Hopefully that it won't last long. 

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Guest I know that Cunt
18 minutes ago, Bubba C said:

Did you ever manage to get your Tesco 2-berth tent setup? 

Nobody cares about your past or present, but I am concerned about your future.

Hopefully that it won't last long. 

Bubba, Mate, that was funny

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37 minutes ago, Bubba C said:

Did you ever manage to get your Tesco 2-berth tent setup? 

Nobody cares about your past or present, but I am concerned about your future.

Hopefully that it won't last long. 

I take it back,I'd rather save the newts,you can fuck off back to the bog that you inhabit

 

 

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Guest Quincy Cockfingers
14 hours ago, Lady Penelope said:

They don't wash

They're not white

They don't work for a living

They never make their own ponds .. simply move into one that is already there

They don't pay council tax

They sometimes grow very large and move to swamps in Florida and eat people

They never smile or tell jokes

They never have names

The don't carry any documentation

They crap anywhere and don't use the rest room

No Great Crested Newt would ever be allowed to be a member of my golf club

..... So why the fuck are they protected? .. cunts

 

 

Fucking newts. Fuck me. 

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