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New York.....cunt wateringly expensive


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Now Mrs Mon C wanted go somewhere nice for Easter. So following on from the shit floating turd fest that was Venice last year, we opted for something a bit more hip and with it this year. Hartlepool was fully booked so we plumbed for the big apple, this old town, manhattan.  Trip advisor did not mention any of the following, so pay attention cunts..  Don't book with Booking dot com, Fucking idiots yeah.   They do not advise you of the need to fill in you ESTA application with the $35 fee online before you go, but then again you are met by some delightful representatives of Delta airlines before you get to their desks, who inform you that there is a computer over there that cost £6 per 10 minutes that you can apply for ESTA online.  With Mrs Mon in a dizzy fit I duly sorted matters only to find that actually like I,had expected, the airline hand out little forms just before landing...cunts.  Holiday already ruined due to inappropriate use of the words "the fuck, cunt, shut the, up".   I experience intermittent vision but no sound for the rest of the day from Mrs Mon.    Despite booking Virgin Airways you are dumped onto a fucking shite delta airlines flight with staff fresh from their dinner ladies shift at the old folks home in the film cocoon.   You wait 2 hours 48 minutes in a huge holding pen waiting in line to go through one of only two immigration passport desks at JFK, no wonder they shot that cunt.  Your luxuary chauffeur car that you booked with fucking dot yeah fucks off because he's never heard it takes that long to clear immigration because he's a lying cunt and didn't even turn up anyway, it's a scam they pull every day. I always thought that a chauffeur was paid to fucking wait on his master. Otherwise he's a fucking taxi.    Manhattan is impressive if you like tall buildings, no sight of the sky, cheap shit hot dog vendors on every corner, paying $129 for three sandwiches and drinks in a diner cafe, $450 for 3 people x 3 breakfasts...that's $50 each if you do the MATH sir. Fuck off Cunts is MATHS.  Makes the $580 dollars for 3 knicks tickets at Maddison square gardens seem positively frugal, along with $880 for a 20 minute helicopter ride.     Where are all the fat people. I was told there would be lots of fat people to look at and call fat cunts.  They are simply not to be seen.  Just lots of slim active nubile 20 somethings pacing around the place no doubt sitting on sofas in coffee shops with only the two nerdy ones fucking each other despite all being friends for over ten years.  No doubt they are unable to afford a lunch, and when it is served up to you, you find yourself looking at a dozen thin fries decanted into a small cup and a burger smaller in stature than the shitest  offerings of the ubiquitous golden M which we avoided like the plague and yet they were mobbed by idiots. So much for large American portions.   Furthermore, paying $275 to stand in a que for 2 hours for the privelidge of traveling a few feet in a lift to see the top of the Empire State gets you to understand why the Big Monkey got all upperty and thinking, "fuck it ...this bastard que is proper shite I'm climbing up there, come on luv hold my hand"!   New York is quite positively THE most expensive way to spunk $6500 in 4 days on a city break without drugs, parties and hookers being involved.  That's Hartlepool.

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9 hours ago, Monumental cunt said:

Now Mrs Mon C wanted go somewhere nice for Easter. So following on from the shit floating turd fest that was Venice last year, we opted for something a bit more hip and with it this year. Hartlepool was fully booked so we plumbed for the big apple, this old town, manhattan.  Trip advisor did not mention any of the following, so pay attention cunts..  Don't book with Booking dot com, Fucking idiots yeah.   They do not advise you of the need to fill in you ESTA application with the $35 fee online before you go, but then again you are met by some delightful representatives of Delta airlines before you get to their desks, who inform you that there is a computer over there that cost £6 per 10 minutes that you can apply for ESTA online.  With Mrs Mon in a dizzy fit I duly sorted matters only to find that actually like I,had expected, the airline hand out little forms just before landing...cunts.  Holiday already ruined due to inappropriate use of the words "the fuck, cunt, shut the, up".   I experience intermittent vision but no sound for the rest of the day from Mrs Mon.    Despite booking Virgin Airways you are dumped onto a fucking shite delta airlines flight with staff fresh from their dinner ladies shift at the old folks home in the film cocoon.   You wait 2 hours 48 minutes in a huge holding pen waiting in line to go through one of only two immigration passport desks at JFK, no wonder they shot that cunt.  Your luxuary chauffeur car that you booked with fucking dot yeah fucks off because he's never heard it takes that long to clear immigration because he's a lying cunt and didn't even turn up anyway, it's a scam they pull every day. I always thought that a chauffeur was paid to fucking wait on his master. Otherwise he's a fucking taxi.    Manhattan is impressive if you like tall buildings, no sight of the sky, cheap shit hot dog vendors on every corner, paying $129 for three sandwiches and drinks in a diner cafe, $450 for 3 people x 3 breakfasts...that's $50 each if you do the MATH sir. Fuck off Cunts is MATHS.  Makes the $580 dollars for 3 knicks tickets at Maddison square gardens seem positively frugal, along with $880 for a 20 minute helicopter ride.     Where are all the fat people. I was told there would be lots of fat people to look at and call fat cunts.  They are simply not to be seen.  Just lots of slim active nubile 20 somethings pacing around the place no doubt sitting on sofas in coffee shops with only the two nerdy ones fucking each other despite all being friends for over ten years.  No doubt they are unable to afford a lunch, and when it is served up to you, you find yourself looking at a dozen thin fries decanted into a small cup and a burger smaller in stature than the shitest  offerings of the ubiquitous golden M which we avoided like the plague and yet they were mobbed by idiots. So much for large American portions.   Furthermore, paying $275 to stand in a que for 2 hours for the privelidge of traveling a few feet in a lift to see the top of the Empire State gets you to understand why the Big Monkey got all upperty and thinking, "fuck it ...this bastard que is proper shite I'm climbing up there, come on luv hold my hand"!   New York is quite positively THE most expensive way to spunk $6500 in 4 days on a city break without drugs, parties and hookers being involved.  That's Hartlepool.

Next year the bright lights of Bridlington eh? 

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Guest Wizardsleeve
13 hours ago, Monumental cunt said:

Now Mrs Mon C wanted go somewhere nice for Easter. So following on from the shit floating turd fest that was Venice last year, we opted for something a bit more hip and with it this year. Hartlepool was fully booked so we plumbed for the big apple, this old town, manhattan.  Trip advisor did not mention any of the following, so pay attention cunts..  Don't book with Booking dot com, Fucking idiots yeah.   They do not advise you of the need to fill in you ESTA application with the $35 fee online before you go, but then again you are met by some delightful representatives of Delta airlines before you get to their desks, who inform you that there is a computer over there that cost £6 per 10 minutes that you can apply for ESTA online.  With Mrs Mon in a dizzy fit I duly sorted matters only to find that actually like I,had expected, the airline hand out little forms just before landing...cunts.  Holiday already ruined due to inappropriate use of the words "the fuck, cunt, shut the, up".   I experience intermittent vision but no sound for the rest of the day from Mrs Mon.    Despite booking Virgin Airways you are dumped onto a fucking shite delta airlines flight with staff fresh from their dinner ladies shift at the old folks home in the film cocoon.   You wait 2 hours 48 minutes in a huge holding pen waiting in line to go through one of only two immigration passport desks at JFK, no wonder they shot that cunt.  Your luxuary chauffeur car that you booked with fucking dot yeah fucks off because he's never heard it takes that long to clear immigration because he's a lying cunt and didn't even turn up anyway, it's a scam they pull every day. I always thought that a chauffeur was paid to fucking wait on his master. Otherwise he's a fucking taxi.    Manhattan is impressive if you like tall buildings, no sight of the sky, cheap shit hot dog vendors on every corner, paying $129 for three sandwiches and drinks in a diner cafe, $450 for 3 people x 3 breakfasts...that's $50 each if you do the MATH sir. Fuck off Cunts is MATHS.  Makes the $580 dollars for 3 knicks tickets at Maddison square gardens seem positively frugal, along with $880 for a 20 minute helicopter ride.     Where are all the fat people. I was told there would be lots of fat people to look at and call fat cunts.  They are simply not to be seen.  Just lots of slim active nubile 20 somethings pacing around the place no doubt sitting on sofas in coffee shops with only the two nerdy ones fucking each other despite all being friends for over ten years.  No doubt they are unable to afford a lunch, and when it is served up to you, you find yourself looking at a dozen thin fries decanted into a small cup and a burger smaller in stature than the shitest  offerings of the ubiquitous golden M which we avoided like the plague and yet they were mobbed by idiots. So much for large American portions.   Furthermore, paying $275 to stand in a que for 2 hours for the privelidge of traveling a few feet in a lift to see the top of the Empire State gets you to understand why the Big Monkey got all upperty and thinking, "fuck it ...this bastard que is proper shite I'm climbing up there, come on luv hold my hand"!   New York is quite positively THE most expensive way to spunk $6500 in 4 days on a city break without drugs, parties and hookers being involved.  That's Hartlepool.

I could have advised you about the pitfalls of New York MC. I hope you had the sense to have a steaming shit on TRump Tower?  

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Guest DingTheRioja
16 hours ago, Monumental cunt said:

Now Mrs Mon C wanted go somewhere nice for Easter. So following on from the shit floating turd fest that was Venice last year, we opted for something a bit more hip and with it this year. Hartlepool was fully booked so we plumbed for the big apple, this old town, manhattan.  Trip advisor did not mention any of the following, so pay attention cunts..  Don't book with Booking dot com, Fucking idiots yeah.   They do not advise you of the need to fill in you ESTA application with the $35 fee online before you go, but then again you are met by some delightful representatives of Delta airlines before you get to their desks, who inform you that there is a computer over there that cost £6 per 10 minutes that you can apply for ESTA online.  With Mrs Mon in a dizzy fit I duly sorted matters only to find that actually like I,had expected, the airline hand out little forms just before landing...cunts.  Holiday already ruined due to inappropriate use of the words "the fuck, cunt, shut the, up".   I experience intermittent vision but no sound for the rest of the day from Mrs Mon.    Despite booking Virgin Airways you are dumped onto a fucking shite delta airlines flight with staff fresh from their dinner ladies shift at the old folks home in the film cocoon.   You wait 2 hours 48 minutes in a huge holding pen waiting in line to go through one of only two immigration passport desks at JFK, no wonder they shot that cunt.  Your luxuary chauffeur car that you booked with fucking dot yeah fucks off because he's never heard it takes that long to clear immigration because he's a lying cunt and didn't even turn up anyway, it's a scam they pull every day. I always thought that a chauffeur was paid to fucking wait on his master. Otherwise he's a fucking taxi.    Manhattan is impressive if you like tall buildings, no sight of the sky, cheap shit hot dog vendors on every corner, paying $129 for three sandwiches and drinks in a diner cafe, $450 for 3 people x 3 breakfasts...that's $50 each if you do the MATH sir. Fuck off Cunts is MATHS.  Makes the $580 dollars for 3 knicks tickets at Maddison square gardens seem positively frugal, along with $880 for a 20 minute helicopter ride.     Where are all the fat people. I was told there would be lots of fat people to look at and call fat cunts.  They are simply not to be seen.  Just lots of slim active nubile 20 somethings pacing around the place no doubt sitting on sofas in coffee shops with only the two nerdy ones fucking each other despite all being friends for over ten years.  No doubt they are unable to afford a lunch, and when it is served up to you, you find yourself looking at a dozen thin fries decanted into a small cup and a burger smaller in stature than the shitest  offerings of the ubiquitous golden M which we avoided like the plague and yet they were mobbed by idiots. So much for large American portions.   Furthermore, paying $275 to stand in a que for 2 hours for the privelidge of traveling a few feet in a lift to see the top of the Empire State gets you to understand why the Big Monkey got all upperty and thinking, "fuck it ...this bastard que is proper shite I'm climbing up there, come on luv hold my hand"!   New York is quite positively THE most expensive way to spunk $6500 in 4 days on a city break without drugs, parties and hookers being involved.  That's Hartlepool.

Should have gone to Hartlepool, £650 and you wouldn't see the sky for hookers minge & drugs for a fortnight.... less likely to be hit by a mass shooting, but marginally more likely to catch something that'd kill you faster than the aforementioned AR-15...

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Guest N/A
14 hours ago, DingTheRioja said:

Should have gone to Hartlepool, £650 and you wouldn't see the sky for hookers minge & drugs for a fortnight.... less likely to be hit by a mass shooting, but marginally more likely to catch something that'd kill you faster than the aforementioned AR-15...

Would they throw in a monkey hanging for an extra £50

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21 hours ago, camberwell gypsy said:

Next year the bright lights of Bridlington eh? 

Mrs Mon C is running out of ideas for city breaks, so Bridlington might make the short list.   Done New York, Madrid, Barcelona, Berlin, Prague, Rome, Venice, Amsterdam, ...... Bridlington and Hartlepool are ahead of Paris at the moment as you get more monkey hangings and less terrorism in Hartlepool.   That's what they do to swarthy looking muzzers up there.  

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On 03/05/2017 at 0:52 AM, Monumental cunt said:

Now Mrs Mon C wanted go somewhere nice for Easter. So following on from the shit floating turd fest that was Venice last year, we opted for something a bit more hip and with it this year. Hartlepool was fully booked so we plumbed for the big apple, this old town, manhattan.  Trip advisor did not mention any of the following, so pay attention cunts..  Don't book with Booking dot com, Fucking idiots yeah.   They do not advise you of the need to fill in you ESTA application with the $35 fee online before you go, but then again you are met by some delightful representatives of Delta airlines before you get to their desks, who inform you that there is a computer over there that cost £6 per 10 minutes that you can apply for ESTA online.  With Mrs Mon in a dizzy fit I duly sorted matters only to find that actually like I,had expected, the airline hand out little forms just before landing...cunts.  Holiday already ruined due to inappropriate use of the words "the fuck, cunt, shut the, up".   I experience intermittent vision but no sound for the rest of the day from Mrs Mon.    Despite booking Virgin Airways you are dumped onto a fucking shite delta airlines flight with staff fresh from their dinner ladies shift at the old folks home in the film cocoon.   You wait 2 hours 48 minutes in a huge holding pen waiting in line to go through one of only two immigration passport desks at JFK, no wonder they shot that cunt.  Your luxuary chauffeur car that you booked with fucking dot yeah fucks off because he's never heard it takes that long to clear immigration because he's a lying cunt and didn't even turn up anyway, it's a scam they pull every day. I always thought that a chauffeur was paid to fucking wait on his master. Otherwise he's a fucking taxi.    Manhattan is impressive if you like tall buildings, no sight of the sky, cheap shit hot dog vendors on every corner, paying $129 for three sandwiches and drinks in a diner cafe, $450 for 3 people x 3 breakfasts...that's $50 each if you do the MATH sir. Fuck off Cunts is MATHS.  Makes the $580 dollars for 3 knicks tickets at Maddison square gardens seem positively frugal, along with $880 for a 20 minute helicopter ride.     Where are all the fat people. I was told there would be lots of fat people to look at and call fat cunts.  They are simply not to be seen.  Just lots of slim active nubile 20 somethings pacing around the place no doubt sitting on sofas in coffee shops with only the two nerdy ones fucking each other despite all being friends for over ten years.  No doubt they are unable to afford a lunch, and when it is served up to you, you find yourself looking at a dozen thin fries decanted into a small cup and a burger smaller in stature than the shitest  offerings of the ubiquitous golden M which we avoided like the plague and yet they were mobbed by idiots. So much for large American portions.   Furthermore, paying $275 to stand in a que for 2 hours for the privelidge of traveling a few feet in a lift to see the top of the Empire State gets you to understand why the Big Monkey got all upperty and thinking, "fuck it ...this bastard que is proper shite I'm climbing up there, come on luv hold my hand"!   New York is quite positively THE most expensive way to spunk $6500 in 4 days on a city break without drugs, parties and hookers being involved.  That's Hartlepool.

Illiterate idiot. 

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Guest nobgobbler
On 04/05/2017 at 7:29 AM, Monumental cunt said:

Mrs Mon C is running out of ideas for city breaks, so Bridlington might make the short list.   Done New York, Madrid, Barcelona, Berlin, Prague, Rome, Venice, Amsterdam, ...... Bridlington and Hartlepool are ahead of Paris at the moment as you get more monkey hangings and less terrorism in Hartlepool.   That's what they do to swarthy looking muzzers up there.  

You should have gone to Vegas. You get free cocktails and nibbles all night just for putting a couple of coins in a bandit.

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Guest DingTheRioja
12 minutes ago, nobgobbler said:

You should have gone to Vegas. You get free cocktails and nibbles all night just for putting a couple of coins in a bandit.

Is that what Punkers calls it now?

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Guest Snatch
2 hours ago, Bubba C said:

Illiterate idiot. 

Brilliant post. I don't know how you keep coming out with such witty remarks time and time again.

Fucking idiot.

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1 hour ago, Stubby Pecker said:

Great come back bubba, I don't know how we've all coped without you. Can you lend me a tenner?   

I've not been away, just been dredging through and translating Mongumental's verbose, god awful noms from 'idiot' into English. Who the fuck does he think he is?

Jokes aside, have I missed much? Please tell me Withers is dead. 

 

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2 minutes ago, Bubba C said:

I've not been away, just been dredging through and translating Mongumental's verbose, god awful noms from 'idiot' into English. Who the fuck does he think he is?

Jokes aside, have I missed much? Please tell me Withers is dead. 

 

You've missed a bunch of fuck all. It's been extremely boring lately. I drew a few pictures and Panzerknacker danced for attention for a while. Oh and Roops banned Monumental Cunt. Other than that it's just been punters talking about how paedos are bad and that they would shag the McCan wench.

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13 minutes ago, Bubba C said:

I've not been away, just been dredging through and translating Mongumental's verbose, god awful noms from 'idiot' into English. Who the fuck does he think he is?

Jokes aside, have I missed much? Please tell me Withers is dead. 

 

It's been great thanks, you should spend the next couple of hours reading the great stuff from pansy bollocks, the useless, non cunting cum stain. That is if you like tit for tat pointless school "humour" devoid of wit.

When you say away, surely you mean treatment for you "tertiary" AIDS?

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15 minutes ago, Bubba C said:

I've not been away, just been dredging through and translating Mongumental's verbose, god awful noms from 'idiot' into English. Who the fuck does he think he is?

Jokes aside, have I missed much? Please tell me Withers is dead. 

 

Welcome back, Bubba. Mrs Roops has been typically brilliant, though sadly for her, sent packing back over the Severn Bridge after nearly choking on her own modesty. Hopefully your archetypal, witty rhetoric will assist Wales suffering too much further embarrassment – even though your pals aren't here to hold your hand.

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Guest Snatch
1 hour ago, Stubby Pecker said:

That is if you like tit for tat pointless school "humour" devoid of wit.

Sounds like the bollocks he used to post along with the other pathetic wankers.

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Guest Wizardsleeve

Welcome back, Bubba!  I can only add that Pen has been determined to drown the corner with her tedium and crawling up Punky's arse. 

Both should be buried up to their necks in pig shit and run over with a commercial lawn tractor. 

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Guest Lady Penelope
4 hours ago, Bubba C said:

I've not been away, just been dredging through and translating Mongumental's verbose, god awful noms from 'idiot' into English. Who the fuck does he think he is?

Jokes aside, have I missed much? Please tell me Withers is dead. 

 

Withers was never alive.

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4 hours ago, Stubby Pecker said:

It's been great thanks, you should spend the next couple of hours reading the great stuff from pansy bollocks, the useless, non cunting cum stain. That is if you like tit for tat pointless school "humour" devoid of wit.

When you say away, surely you mean treatment for you "tertiary" AIDS?

I did see a good number of cunts digging out pansy, did the little retard finally have a meltdown? Odd, considering the weird little benefits scrounger has about firing synapses, I figured he lacked the mental capability. 

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4 minutes ago, Bubba C said:

I did see a good number of cunts digging out pansy, did the little retard finally have a meltdown? Odd, considering the weird little benefits scrounger has about firing synapses, I figured he lacked the mental capability. 

Oh, he does. His meltdown equated to him posting a few entirely pointless noms, one of which went as far as to make people wonder if he was under the influence of amphetamines, one about shoes, and one revealing that he needs a carer to cook his meals for him because he literally can't boil water. Even his mental breaks are dull.

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8 minutes ago, Bubba C said:

I did see a good number of cunts digging out pansy, did the little retard finally have a meltdown? Odd, considering the weird little benefits scrounger has about firing synapses, I figured he lacked the mental capability. 

For a nano second he was frothing at the arsehole and actually joined in the game of cunting. Now he likes to rest punkers nut sack on his chin and churn out his usual indecipherable gibberish. He really is a cuntbreed of the highest order and the antithesis of what this site is about. 

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8 hours ago, Wolfie said:

Welcome back, Bubba. Mrs Roops has been typically brilliant, though sadly for her, sent packing back over the Severn Bridge after nearly choking on her own modesty. Hopefully your archetypal, witty rhetoric will assist Wales suffering too much further embarrassment – even though your pals aren't here to hold your hand.

..an assessment as reliable as your hilarious take on pre WW II German economic history...

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