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Hosepipe bans.


Guest 'eavensabove

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Guest 'eavensabove

Freak temperatures in the North, have resulted with the first hosepipe ban since 2012 which in turn has led to the already dirty & sweaty Northerners being unable to wash. United Facilities have imposed & enforced a ban of hosepipes to 7 million people(?) in the North West alone, which will of course have a detrimental affect and could spread Typhus and other sickly diseases to the lower hemispheres of our realm.  Sprinklers, are also a no-go, and so a communal weekly-scrub in the back yards of Merseyside, will be a thing of the past and will leave many with nothing better to do but scratch their heads.

funny-fatty-2.jpg

 

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Guest 'eavensabove
2 minutes ago, Jiggerycock said:

Maybe Punkape can spot them a few quid?

He knows doctors, lawyers, priests - men of standing you know - and as he'll no doubt concur, 'cleanliness is next to Godliness'

I know they're only Northerners and all that, but do they deserve Punkers intervention?

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Imagine the state of Punkape's festering arsehole if he is unable to administer his thrice daily hosepipe enema. I imagine the resulting backup of spunk will have him chucking up and spitting out vast globules of semem like some sort of Marc Almond/cobra hybrid.

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Guest 'eavensabove
4 minutes ago, Decimus said:

Imagine the state of Punkape's festering arsehole if he is unable to administer his thrice daily hosepipe enema. I imagine the resulting backup of spunk will have him chucking up vast globules of semem like some sort of Marc Almond/cobra hybrid.

Inverted traffic-cone more the likes, the brim of which overflows with piss & scat, from His 'Dump & Go' tranny mob of perverted Northern scum. 

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Guest Trumpton  Bacon
18 minutes ago, Decimus said:

Imagine the state of Punkape's festering arsehole if he is unable to administer his thrice daily hosepipe enema. I imagine the resulting backup of spunk will have him chucking up and spitting out vast globules of semem like some sort of Marc Almond/cobra hybrid.

Decs, sometimes you remind me of Ratty, albeit, somewhat less surreal and with a more agreeable font.

 

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3 minutes ago, Trumpton Bacon said:

Decs, sometimes you remind me of Ratty, albeit, somewhat less surreal and with a more agreeable font.

 

Thank you for your kind words, Trumpo, it's been a tough day for me. After being pulled up about my quite frankly outrageous fabrications regarding going to the shop and sitting on a train, my confidence has been shot to shit.

It's nice to feel appreciated.

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Guest 'eavensabove
7 minutes ago, Decimus said:

Thank you for your kind words, Trumpo, it's been a tough day for me. After being pulled up about my quite frankly outrageous fabrications regarding going to the shop and sitting on a train, my confidence has been shot to shit.

It's nice to feel appreciated.

It's probably best to swear upon oath that what you say "is the whole truth and nothing but the truth m'lud" what with judge questioning your activities.

On the other hand, just tell the Nerd to fuck off. 

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40 minutes ago, Decimus said:

Imagine the state of Punkape's festering arsehole if he is unable to administer his thrice daily hosepipe enema. I imagine the resulting backup of spunk will have him chucking up and spitting out vast globules of semem like some sort of Marc Almond/cobra hybrid.

I'm not saying Punkape's a cocoa shunter, but before he eats a banana, he spits on it.

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Guest 'eavensabove
Just now, nocti said:

I'm not saying Punkape's a cocoa shunter, but before he eats a banana, he spits on it.

I'd wager he also spits upon a benders back to fake an orgasm. 

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1 hour ago, Decimus said:

Thank you for your kind words, Trumpo, it's been a tough day for me. After being pulled up about my quite frankly outrageous fabrications regarding going to the shop and sitting on a train, my confidence has been shot to shit.

It's nice to feel appreciated.

Ooh, get you! Claiming not only to use public transport, but also to go into shops.

If there's any truth to these grandiose tales of a life most can only dream of, keep it to yourself, lest you stir up too much resentment among the proletariat.

Flash cunt.

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Guest Wizardsleeve
6 hours ago, Jiggerycock said:

Maybe Punkape can spot them a few quid?

He knows doctors, lawyers, priests - men of standing you know - and as he'll no doubt concur, 'cleanliness is next to Godliness'

He knows standing men alright, they form a long queue outside the gents public carpark toilets every Saturday night.  

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9 hours ago, 'eavensabove said:

Freak temperatures in the North, have resulted with the first hosepipe ban since 2012 which in turn has led to the already dirty & sweaty Northerners being unable to wash. United Facilities have imposed & enforced a ban of hosepipes to 7 million people(?) in the North West alone, which will of course have a detrimental affect and could spread Typhus and other sickly diseases to the lower hemispheres of our realm.  Sprinklers, are also a no-go, and so a communal weekly-scrub in the back yards of Merseyside, will be a thing of the past and will leave many with nothing better to do but scratch their heads.

funny-fatty-2.jpg

 

Roops that top doesn’t suit you dear.

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Guest 'eavensabove
21 hours ago, 'eavensabove said:

Freak temperatures in the North, have resulted with the first hosepipe ban since 2012 which in turn has led to the already dirty & sweaty Northerners being unable to wash. United Facilities have imposed & enforced a ban of hosepipes to 7 million people(?) in the North West alone, which will of course have a detrimental affect and could spread Typhus and other sickly diseases to the lower hemispheres of our realm.  Sprinklers, are also a no-go, and so a communal weekly-scrub in the back yards of Merseyside, will be a thing of the past and will leave many with nothing better to do but scratch their heads.

funny-fatty-2.jpg

 

Does anybody know the hooded person in the straight-jacket, strapped-on for Dear Life?

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23 hours ago, 'eavensabove said:

Freak temperatures in the North, have resulted with the first hosepipe ban since 2012 which in turn has led to the already dirty & sweaty Northerners being unable to wash. United Facilities have imposed & enforced a ban of hosepipes to 7 million people(?) in the North West alone, which will of course have a detrimental affect and could spread Typhus and other sickly diseases to the lower hemispheres of our realm.  Sprinklers, are also a no-go, and so a communal weekly-scrub in the back yards of Merseyside, will be a thing of the past and will leave many with nothing better to do but scratch their heads.

funny-fatty-2.jpg

 

Man, that's one monster catheter.

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