Ape™️ Posted February 12, 2016 Report Share Posted February 12, 2016 Had to go into Gloucester today, a wretched hive of scum and villainy at the best of times, and was confronted by a total fucking nutter who started shouting "basmati rice" at me! He hadn't singled me out for any special attention as he proceeded to yell it at a number of other people. There's generally a nutter or two milling about in most town centres, and generally they are harmless. This cunt was actually quite aggressive and either needed his medication or locking in a padded cell. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nocti Posted February 12, 2016 Report Share Posted February 12, 2016 27 minutes ago, Ape said: This cunt was actually quite aggressive and either needed his medication or locking in a padded cell. Sounds like he was making it abundantly clear what he needed. Some basmati rice. Fuck me this anecdote made me chuckle, Ape. Of all the things to have shouted at you. Makes me wonder if there are spider-eating fucknuts in various parts of Gloucestershire screaming for different sundries. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted February 12, 2016 Author Report Share Posted February 12, 2016 6 minutes ago, nocti said: Sounds like he was making it abundantly clear what he needed. Some basmati rice. Fuck me this anecdote made me chuckle, Ape. Perhaps, if I'd looked more closely, the cunt had a takeaway balti that, being a little autistic, he couldn't entertain eating without rice? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted February 12, 2016 Report Share Posted February 12, 2016 One of our local nutters got burgled a couple of times so took his back and front doors off so they couldn't burgle him again. Carried all his worldly possessions around in a rucksack. On Saturday and Sunday mornings he would walk around town throwing all the empty cans into the road. An hour or two later he would pick up all the now flat cans and walk 5 miles to a recycling centre and cash them in. He got a couple of quid a week doing this. He even had a magnet so he bagged ferrous and non-ferrous separately. And this was his normal behaviour. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jiggerycock Posted February 12, 2016 Report Share Posted February 12, 2016 Got as far as 'Had to go into Gloucester today......' and wondered how you were going to delineate the 'nutters' the nom title suggested, from the rest of the population. Went racing in Cheltenham and stayed in Gloucester once - never again! Left there thinking Fred West had a point. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted February 12, 2016 Report Share Posted February 12, 2016 1 minute ago, Jiggerycock said: Left there thinking Fred West had a point. To be fair... I think that about most big towns and cities I've visited in the UK... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
colonelkurtz Posted February 12, 2016 Report Share Posted February 12, 2016 4 minutes ago, Jiggerycock said: Got as far as 'Had to go into Gloucester today......' and wondered how you were going to delineate the 'nutters' the nom title suggested, from the rest of the population. Went racing in Cheltenham and stayed in Gloucester once - never again! Left there thinking Fred West had a point. been there a few times ... it's really just croydon with a few old pubs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted February 12, 2016 Author Report Share Posted February 12, 2016 5 minutes ago, Jiggerycock said: Got as far as 'Had to go into Gloucester today......' and wondered how you were going to delineate the 'nutters' the nom title suggested, from the rest of the population. Went racing in Cheltenham and stayed in Gloucester once - never again! Left there thinking Fred West had a point. I'm pretty sure a group of people patrol Gloucester with ugly sticks, which they beat the populous with violently and regularly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted February 12, 2016 Author Report Share Posted February 12, 2016 17 minutes ago, Manky said: One of our local nutters got burgled a couple of times so took his back and front doors off so they couldn't burgle him again. Carried all his worldly possessions around in a rucksack. On Saturday and Sunday mornings he would walk around town throwing all the empty cans into the road. An hour or two later he would pick up all the now flat cans and walk 5 miles to a recycling centre and cash them in. He got a couple of quid a week doing this. He even had a magnet so he bagged ferrous and non-ferrous separately. And this was his normal behaviour. Sounds like a highly industrious nutter. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted February 12, 2016 Report Share Posted February 12, 2016 1 minute ago, Ape said: Sounds like a highly industrious nutter. I have also seen a naked woman running down a city centre Street pushing a supermarket trolley full of empty bottles, throwing them at passers by. I was asked by the police to describe her. I said " Naked, pushing a supermarket trolley and throwing bottles at people. If you do a line-up of all the naked, supermarket trolley pushing, bottle throwing people you have arrested, I'll try to pick her out" Useless cunts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted February 12, 2016 Report Share Posted February 12, 2016 We seem to have an inordinate amount of these types in Norfolk. Possibly due to the high level of inbreeding or due to the fact that there's fuck all to do except make a complete cunt of yourself on the streets of boring market towns. If you Google the Norwich puppet man, you'll see exactly what I mean. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MikeD Posted February 12, 2016 Report Share Posted February 12, 2016 I don't mind the town centre nutters as there's always room to fuck off. When you get stuck with one of the cunts on a bus...... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Snatch Posted February 12, 2016 Report Share Posted February 12, 2016 1 hour ago, MikeD said: I don't mind the town centre nutters as there's always room to fuck off. When you get stuck with one of the cunts on a bus...... Bus wankers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted February 12, 2016 Report Share Posted February 12, 2016 4 hours ago, Manky said: I have also seen a naked woman running down a city centre Street pushing a supermarket trolley full of empty bottles, throwing them at passers by. I was asked by the police to describe her. I said " Naked, pushing a supermarket trolley and throwing bottles at people. If you do a line-up of all the naked, supermarket trolley pushing, bottle throwing people you have arrested, I'll try to pick her out" Useless cunts. For fuck sake Manky I was going through a bad time, drink problems that sort of thing. But that's all in the past. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted February 12, 2016 Report Share Posted February 12, 2016 1 minute ago, camberwell gypsy said: For fuck sake Manky I was going through a bad time, drink problems that sort of thing. But that's all in the past. If that was you, by fuck you are a minger. She was. Seen better bodies in a Trabant scrapyard Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba C Posted February 12, 2016 Report Share Posted February 12, 2016 2 hours ago, Decimus said: We seem to have an inordinate amount of these types in Norfolk. Possibly due to the high level of inbreeding or due to the fact that there's fuck all to do except make a complete cunt of yourself on the streets of boring market towns. If you Google the Norwich puppet man, you'll see exactly what I mean. I think I can top that. Google 'ninjah, Cardiff bin drummer' and you'll see what I mean. Cue 'Welsh cunt' abuse....... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted February 12, 2016 Report Share Posted February 12, 2016 There used to be a few incidents a month on the buses passing The Maudsley psychiatric hospital Camberwell. Many a time you would have found someone in a gown or pyjamas sitting next to you, or being dragged off by a couple of hard-faced bastards in white coats. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted February 12, 2016 Report Share Posted February 12, 2016 Just now, camberwell gypsy said: There used to be a few incidents a month on the buses The Peckham Terminator. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted February 12, 2016 Report Share Posted February 12, 2016 2 hours ago, Manky said: If that was you, by fuck you are a minger. She was. Seen better bodies in a Trabant scrapyard In the words of that shit song "It wasn't me"' it wasn't me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MikeD Posted February 12, 2016 Report Share Posted February 12, 2016 3 hours ago, Snatch said: Bus wankers. I hate them as well, you'd think they'd do it in private. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted February 12, 2016 Report Share Posted February 12, 2016 3 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: In the words of that shit song "It wasn't me"' it wasn't me. I didn't think it was. Some of our nutters are absolute stars. I remember a multi millionaire ( through graft, not inheritance ) sleeping in the gardens with all the tramps. When the bill arrived to move them all on, he led a charge by tramps, homeless and one millionaire against the forces of law and order. As they were all pissed as cunts on cheap cider they were all locked up in 5 seconds flat. He got a ten quid fine and bound over for 12 months. He also paid the fines of all the other miscreants, in cash, out of his wallet. He had started the evening off at a charity do sat next to Gods copper, Sir James Anderton who was Chief Constable of Greater Manchester Police. Proper northern nutter. Great bloke, still see him around the pubs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted February 12, 2016 Report Share Posted February 12, 2016 34 minutes ago, Manky said: I didn't think it was. Some of our nutters are absolute stars. I remember a multi millionaire ( through graft, not inheritance ) sleeping in the gardens with all the tramps. When the bill arrived to move them all on, he led a charge by tramps, homeless and one millionaire against the forces of law and order. As they were all pissed as cunts on cheap cider they were all locked up in 5 seconds flat. He got a ten quid fine and bound over for 12 months. He also paid the fines of all the other miscreants, in cash, out of his wallet. He had started the evening off at a charity do sat next to Gods copper, Sir James Anderton who was Chief Constable of Greater Manchester Police. Proper northern nutter. Great bloke, still see him around the pubs. Remember Anderton. Big bastard with big beard. Working class background. Probably no stranger to ramming faces into cell walls. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cuntspotter Posted February 12, 2016 Report Share Posted February 12, 2016 44 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: Remember Anderton. Big bastard with big beard. Working class background. Probably no stranger to ramming faces into cell walls. Yes... He had a think about homosexuals "swirling around in a cess pool of their own making". Sounded like a bit of a fucking oddie to me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest nobgobbler Posted February 13, 2016 Report Share Posted February 13, 2016 2 hours ago, MikeD said: I hate them as well, you'd think they'd do it in private. Witnessing public wanking is a cunt. I once saw a dirty old cunt do it in the acute assessment unit in the hospital. As if I wasn't fucking ill enough already. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest deebom Posted February 13, 2016 Report Share Posted February 13, 2016 Only one nutter Ape? You should visit Lewisham some day. It's full of crazy Rastas talking to God, Twitching, dribbling junkies asking for Rizla, and bi-polar loons walking around shouting. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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