Ape™️ Posted February 18, 2016 Report Share Posted February 18, 2016 A very specific nom I'll grant you, but it annoys the fuck out of me nevertheless. The number of idiots I see, on the way to work, cautiously poking the rear of their cars out into busy rush hour traffic, without having a clue what's coming down the road at 50 mph, is staggering. They've got to perform a reversing manoeuvre either way, so why not back on and make getting off the drive a whole lot safer and easier. Stupid fucking cunts. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nocti Posted February 18, 2016 Report Share Posted February 18, 2016 Ape you great big sweaty bastard, I was actually thinking about this the other day when some cunt did exactly as you described. Yes it's a bit niche, but at least we're getting back to what the fucking site is for. I honestly think any kind of parking should be done in reverse. Sure, if it's in a busy area, people might have to wait a few seconds longer, but more people will be glad of it when you're not coming out of the space like a fucking invalid. A swift flash of the lights letting them know you're coming out, and off you fuck. Perhaps even a quick flick of the indicators to let other cunts know which way you're going, unless you're in a BMW. Or an Audi. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Snatch Posted February 18, 2016 Report Share Posted February 18, 2016 2 minutes ago, nocti said: Ape you great big sweaty bastard, I was actually thinking about this the other day when some cunt did exactly as you described. Yes it's a bit niche, but at least we're getting back to what the fucking site is for. I honestly think any kind of parking should be done in reverse. Sure, if it's in a busy area, people might have to wait a few seconds longer, but more people will be glad of it when you're not coming out of the space like a fucking invalid. A swift flash of the lights letting them know you're coming out, and off you fuck. Perhaps even a quick flick of the indicators to let other cunts know which way you're going, unless you're in a BMW. Or an Audi. Sounds like Judge at one of his favourite parking spots. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MikeD Posted February 18, 2016 Report Share Posted February 18, 2016 5 minutes ago, Snatch said: Sounds like Judge at one of his favourite parking spots. Judge came out with such force that it looked like his closet had been hit with a fucking cluster bomb. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nocti Posted February 18, 2016 Report Share Posted February 18, 2016 1 minute ago, Snatch said: Sounds like Judge at one of his favourite parking spots. Rumour has it he's on light flashing terms with Stan Collymore, John Leslie, and George Michael; and if graffitti around the M1 is to be believed he can smell Michael Barrymore's cock from over 25 miles away. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba C Posted February 18, 2016 Report Share Posted February 18, 2016 26 minutes ago, Ape said: A very specific nom I'll grant you, but it annoys the fuck out of me nevertheless. The number of idiots I see, on the way to work, cautiously poking the rear of their cars out into busy rush hour traffic, without having a clue what's coming down the road at 50 mph, is staggering. They've got to perform a reversing manoeuvre either way, so why not back on and make getting off the drive a whole lot safer and easier. Stupid fucking cunts. I can't reverse onto my drive as the cunt who lives around the corner parks his fucking great van in the most fucking stupid place. I've tried reasoning with the stupid prick, but he's having none of it. I'm not the kind of curtain-twitching baby who feels the need to call the council, but the guy is an inconsiderate wanker. What I will say though, is I don't have to reverse into a main road, what sort of pikey cunt lives somewhere like that? Ding? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted February 18, 2016 Report Share Posted February 18, 2016 2 hours ago, Ape said: A very specific nom I'll grant you, but it annoys the fuck out of me nevertheless. The number of idiots I see, on the way to work, cautiously poking the rear of their cars out into busy rush hour traffic, without having a clue what's coming down the road at 50 mph, is staggering. They've got to perform a reversing manoeuvre either way, so why not back on and make getting off the drive a whole lot safer and easier. Stupid fucking cunts. Wow what a riveting nom. What next ,drivers who don't indicate when turning left. You stupid boring cunt Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Bill Stickers Posted February 18, 2016 Report Share Posted February 18, 2016 6 minutes ago, witheredscrote said: Wow what a riveting nom. What next ,drivers who don't indicate when turning left. You stupid boring cunt An insult delivered with all the assertiveness and authority of a menopausal, diminutive supply teacher. As they say, those who cunt, teach. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MikeD Posted February 18, 2016 Report Share Posted February 18, 2016 7 minutes ago, witheredscrote said: Wow what a riveting nom. What next ,drivers who don't indicate when turning left. You stupid boring cunt Fucking hell Withers. Everything okay at home? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Bill Stickers Posted February 18, 2016 Report Share Posted February 18, 2016 45 minutes ago, Bubbles said: I can't reverse onto my drive as the cunt who lives around the corner parks his fucking great van in the most fucking stupid place. I've tried reasoning with the stupid prick, but he's having none of it. I'm not the kind of curtain-twitching baby who feels the need to call the council, but the guy is an inconsiderate wanker. What I will say though, is I don't have to reverse into a main road, what sort of pikey cunt lives somewhere like that? Ding? Have you considered masquerading as your neighbour, arranging the sale of his van at a knock-down price, down the local gyppo camp? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted February 18, 2016 Report Share Posted February 18, 2016 1 minute ago, witheredscrote said: Wow what a riveting nom. What next ,drivers w ho don't indicate when turning left. You stupid boring cunt Withers, you mime loving, product of a German soldier's rape. For a nation of Renault drivers, no Froggy should ever cast aspersions on an English man's right to bemoan the inconsiderate nature of other highway users. Kindly chuck yourself in the Seine, slitting your own bloated, toad-like throat first, to make sure that exsanguination will kill you, if drowning doesn't do the trick. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted February 18, 2016 Report Share Posted February 18, 2016 If only we all had helipads like Spunky, this issue simply wouldn't arise in the first place. Budgie was a cunt. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba C Posted February 18, 2016 Report Share Posted February 18, 2016 3 minutes ago, Bill Stickers said: Have you considered masquerading as your neighbour, arranging the sale of his van at a knock-down price, down the local gyppo camp? How did you know there was a Ding family residence a few miles away? I was tempted to offer the pikeys a few pounds to destroy the fucking thing, but like MikeD, I'm pretty sure the little fuckers would just hang around, expecting recognition or something. You should see the stupid thing, it's the daft cunts own business van, and he's decorated it like the fucking A team, red fucking stripe an' all. And the cunt plays squash.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted February 18, 2016 Report Share Posted February 18, 2016 1 hour ago, MikeD said: Fucking hell Withers. Everything okay at home? Everything here in undercrowded France is absolutely fine Mike but I have to return to the U.K on Saturday and that has put me in a black mood. I have got to endure 3 days of avoiding potholes, traffic jams , expensive booze and stupid cunts reversing out onto the main road. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Bill Stickers Posted February 18, 2016 Report Share Posted February 18, 2016 There's a thread somewhere on here about cunts who key cars. Turns out quite a few members here have done it, perhaps unsurprisingly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba C Posted February 18, 2016 Report Share Posted February 18, 2016 3 minutes ago, witheredscrote said: Everything here in undercrowded France is absolutely fine Mike but I have to return to the U.K on Saturday and that has put me in a black mood. I have got to endure 3 days of avoiding potholes, traffic jams , expensive booze and stupid cunts reversing out onto the main road. I'm sure if the cunts here had a whip-round, they'd more than cover cost of a bottle of spirits for you so that you could drunkenly reverse yourself out into the path of a speeding lorry. Probably on the wrong side of the road, you backward driving idiot Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nocti Posted February 18, 2016 Report Share Posted February 18, 2016 16 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said: If only we all had helipads like Spunky, this issue simply wouldn't arise in the first place. Budgie was a cunt. Could you imagine the noms though? "Cunts who bank 45 degrees left without fingering their arsehole." 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted February 18, 2016 Report Share Posted February 18, 2016 The obvious person to ask about the benefits or otherwise of reversing his car is manky. He's the expert, so why hasn't he posted yet? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted February 18, 2016 Report Share Posted February 18, 2016 22 minutes ago, scotty said: The obvious person to ask about the benefits or otherwise of reversing his car is manky. Or Brian Harvey. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted February 18, 2016 Report Share Posted February 18, 2016 51 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said: If only we all had helipads like Spunky, this issue simply wouldn't arise in the first place. Budgie was a cunt. Pip and Chuck and Lionel in a new adventure. Never mind Budgie, ginger foot fetishists are cunts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nocti Posted February 18, 2016 Report Share Posted February 18, 2016 1 minute ago, Decimus said: Or Brian Harvey. One of my favourite noms ever on this site was of that potato loving, car-happy cunt. People really tore him apart and I fucking lost it plenty of times. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted February 19, 2016 Report Share Posted February 19, 2016 8 hours ago, nocti said: One of my favourite noms ever on this site was of that potato loving, car-happy cunt. People really tore him apart and I fucking lost it plenty of times. Oh christ, jeff mitchell the tailpipe man. I'd forgotten him, that was funny as hell. Probably wasn't actually him though, but there was some disagreement about that. He also liked to fuck hoovers iirc. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted February 19, 2016 Report Share Posted February 19, 2016 14 hours ago, Ape said: A very specific nom I'll grant you, but it annoys the fuck out of me nevertheless. The number of idiots I see, on the way to work, cautiously poking the rear of their cars out into busy rush hour traffic, without having a clue what's coming down the road at 50 mph, is staggering. They've got to perform a reversing manoeuvre either way, so why not back on and make getting off the drive a whole lot safer and easier. Stupid fucking cunts. I'll give you a more specific version... the cuntswho drive head first into a parking space in the supermarket carpark, one of the spaces closest to whatever mini-roundabout/4-way junction is the busiest, just because "it's closer to the door and I'll have to walk a whole 20 yards less" then wonder why the fuck it takes them 4 hours to revers back out, and why everyone mashes their horn screaming abuse out the window at them.. 14 hours ago, nocti said: ...........Yes it's a bit niche, but at least we're getting back to what the fucking site is for. I honestly think any kind of parking should be done in reverse. Sure, if it's in a busy area, people might have to wait a few seconds longer, but more people will be glad of it when you're not coming out of the space like a fucking invalid. A swift flash of the lights letting them know you're coming out, and off you fuck. Perhaps even a quick flick of the indicators to let other cunts know which way you're going, unless you're in a BMW. Or an Audi. It is technically illegal to reverse out onto a main road, I think due to the "due care and attention" stuff.... How the fuck people don't realise its actually easier to reverse in, drive out, rather than drive in, reverse out I'll never fucking know.. 13 hours ago, Bubbles said: I can't reverse onto my drive as the cunt who lives around the corner parks his fucking great van in the most fucking stupid place. I've tried reasoning with the stupid prick, but he's having none of it. I'm not the kind of curtain-twitching baby who feels the need to call the council, but the guy is an inconsiderate wanker. What I will say though, is I don't have to reverse into a main road, what sort of pikey cunt lives somewhere like that? Ding? The kind of pikey cunt that lives next door to someone who has a tranny van for work? Anyway.. he probably parks it there on purpose, it would actually be easier for him to park it elsewhere, he just likes annoying the lace-curtain twitching cunt next door... 12 hours ago, witheredscrote said: Everything here in undercrowded France is absolutely fine Mike but I have to return to the U.K on Saturday and that has put me in a black mood. I have got to endure 3 days of avoiding potholes, traffic jams , expensive booze and stupid cunts reversing out onto the main road. Fucking hell.. I have to agree the scrote... except that's only down south..... whenever I'm driving home from abroad, I can feel myself getting tense and wound up with every cunt on the roads... this tends to peak around the Blackwell crossing, and lasts until I turn off the M25 onto the A1.... and it gradually subsides mile by mile as I head into civilisation... This is ignoring French Driving Rule #2.... You MUST drive within 1 metre of the car in front, if driving in excess of 30mph... you can go up to a maximum of 1.5m for safety reasons if over 80mph... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba C Posted February 19, 2016 Report Share Posted February 19, 2016 6 minutes ago, DingTheRioja said: I'll give you a more specific version... the cuntswho drive head first into a parking space in the supermarket carpark, one of the spaces closest to whatever mini-roundabout/4-way junction is the busiest, just because "it's closer to the door and I'll have to walk a whole 20 yards less" then wonder why the fuck it takes them 4 hours to revers back out, and why everyone mashes their horn screaming abuse out the window at them.. It is technically illegal to reverse out onto a main road, I think due to the "due care and attention" stuff.... How the fuck people don't realise its actually easier to reverse in, drive out, rather than drive in, reverse out I'll never fucking know.. The kind of pikey cunt that lives next door to someone who has a tranny van for work? Anyway.. he probably parks it there on purpose, it would actually be easier for him to park it elsewhere, he just likes annoying the lace-curtain twitching cunt next door... Fucking hell.. I have to agree the scrote... except that's only down south..... whenever I'm driving home from abroad, I can feel myself getting tense and wound up with every cunt on the roads... this tends to peak around the Blackwell crossing, and lasts until I turn off the M25 onto the A1.... and it gradually subsides mile by mile as I head into civilisation... This is ignoring French Driving Rule #2.... You MUST drive within 1 metre of the car in front, if driving in excess of 30mph... you can go up to a maximum of 1.5m for safety reasons if over 80mph... Fucking dopey as fuck boring cunt Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Quincy Cockfingers Posted February 19, 2016 Report Share Posted February 19, 2016 13 hours ago, Decimus said: Withers, you mime loving, product of a German soldier's rape. For a nation of Renault drivers, no Froggy should ever cast aspersions on an English man's right to bemoan the inconsiderate nature of other highway users. Kindly chuck yourself in the Seine, slitting your own bloated, toad-like throat first, to make sure that exsanguination will kill you, if drowning doesn't do the trick. Or, simply have a tiny sip of that great grease-slick riparian slither of liquid "shunk" and instantly swell up black with disease and croak, froggy fuckstick. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.