Guest luke swarm Posted September 8, 2016 Report Share Posted September 8, 2016 "I see the nights are drawing in.....I have to put my headlights on in the mornings to go to work". Every year about this time we have endure this sort of pointless conversation from stupid cunts such as Mrs Swarm......yes I am aware that all these things that you say are occurring...they occur every year and have done so for at least my lifetime, don't know what sort of seasonal changeover there was before then but definitely as far as I have been alive. In about a months time we will continue this pointless conversations with the " why don't they just stop messing around with the clocks and leave it on summer time all year round" Inevitably there is always some smartarse cunt nearby who will then start harping on about farmers and the need for more daylight....can we get more daylight by getting up earlier...never really understood that argument. Brrr, going to have to switch on the heating soon. etc etc Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nocti Posted September 8, 2016 Report Share Posted September 8, 2016 Great nom Swarmers, this kind of talk really flicks my dick. Even people who you think have a modicum of intelligence begin conversations with how the weather has suddenly been fucking hijacked, like it didn't happen the year before, and the year before that, etc. One of the things that really fucks me off about this time of year is how everyone acts like they've been round neil's house, tottering around talking utter shit, with no recollection of what has happened beforehand. Most probably with a sore arse. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest nobgobbler Posted September 8, 2016 Report Share Posted September 8, 2016 Int it gettin dark early! We wa sat art eer at 10 o'clock a fortneet ago. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted September 8, 2016 Report Share Posted September 8, 2016 I like it when the clocks go back and I get an extra hour in bed. Why can't they put the clocks back a couple of hours every night? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Fatty Posted September 8, 2016 Report Share Posted September 8, 2016 1 hour ago, luke swarm said: "I see the nights are drawing in.....I have to put my headlights on in the mornings to go to work". Every year about this time we have endure this sort of pointless conversation from stupid cunts such as Mrs Swarm......yes I am aware that all these things that you say are occurring...they occur every year and have done so for at least my lifetime, don't know what sort of seasonal changeover there was before then but definitely as far as I have been alive. In about a months time we will continue this pointless conversations with the " why don't they just stop messing around with the clocks and leave it on summer time all year round" Inevitably there is always some smartarse cunt nearby who will then start harping on about farmers and the need for more daylight....can we get more daylight by getting up earlier...never really understood that argument. Brrr, going to have to switch on the heating soon. etc etc You never dissapoint, another shite nom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest luke swarm Posted September 8, 2016 Report Share Posted September 8, 2016 10 minutes ago, Fatty said: You never dissapoint, another shite nom and as always, I am happy that you are disappointed Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest nobgobbler Posted September 8, 2016 Report Share Posted September 8, 2016 59 minutes ago, Fatty said: You never dissapoint, another shite nom Keef. Luv. Will you do me a favour and reinstate your fat lad avatar. It's difficult to call you a fat cunt without it. Thank you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted September 8, 2016 Report Share Posted September 8, 2016 10 minutes ago, nobgobbler said: Keef. Luv. Will you do me a favour and reinstate your fat lad avatar. It's difficult to call you a fat cunt without it. Thank you. No its not. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted September 8, 2016 Report Share Posted September 8, 2016 2 hours ago, luke swarm said: "I see the nights are drawing in.....I have to put my headlights on in the mornings to go to work". Every year about this time we have endure this sort of pointless conversation from stupid cunts such as Mrs Swarm......yes I am aware that all these things that you say are occurring...they occur every year and have done so for at least my lifetime, don't know what sort of seasonal changeover there was before then but definitely as far as I have been alive. In about a months time we will continue this pointless conversations with the " why don't they just stop messing around with the clocks and leave it on summer time all year round" Inevitably there is always some smartarse cunt nearby who will then start harping on about farmers and the need for more daylight....can we get more daylight by getting up earlier...never really understood that argument. Brrr, going to have to switch on the heating soon. etc etc Why do you give a flying fuck about what she says, luke? Once she's fucked off to earn the daily crust you can go straight back to bed anyway. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Drew P Pissflaps Posted September 8, 2016 Report Share Posted September 8, 2016 I have to agree with common sense and agree, SHIT NOM. If the Earth didn't turn we would all float off into space. Ask Brian Cox or suck some Cox both activities are likely to confuse you. Up your game for fuck, fuck, fuckety fucks sake. Cunt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest luke swarm Posted September 8, 2016 Report Share Posted September 8, 2016 1 minute ago, Drew P Pissflaps said: I have to agree with common sense and agree, SHIT NOM. If the Earth didn't turn we would all float off into space. Ask Brian Cox or suck some Cox both activities are likely to confuse you. Up your game for fuck, fuck, fuckety fucks sake. Cunt. That is easy for you to say....bungalows being almost subterranean are not subject to the same laws of gravity as the rest of the normal house dwelling populace. .........although it would actually be a cause for great merriment to us all if you did just float off into space you follically challenged rodent. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted September 8, 2016 Report Share Posted September 8, 2016 55 minutes ago, Drew P Pissflaps said: If the Earth didn't turn we would all float off into space. Many nasty things would happen if the Earth didn't turn but all floating off into space wouldn't be one of them. PS I'd better not catch anyone making the "The Earth sucks" joke, either. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest luke swarm Posted September 8, 2016 Report Share Posted September 8, 2016 2 hours ago, scotty said: Why do you give a flying fuck about what she says, luke? Once she's fucked off to earn the daily crust you can go straight back to bed anyway. Nonsense....I am gainfully employed and work very hard for my minimum wage....ok its a zero hours contract but after the CRB checks its all I could get. That Mike Ashley is a smashing bloke. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted September 8, 2016 Report Share Posted September 8, 2016 3 hours ago, Drew P Pissflaps said: I have to agree with common sense and agree, SHIT NOM. If the Earth didn't turn we would all float off into space. Ask Brian Cox or suck some Cox both activities are likely to confuse you. Up your game for fuck, fuck, fuckety fucks sake. Cunt. What the fuck does Brian Cox know about space, He's an actor. He was in the Bourne film and played Hannibal Lektor (better than that Welsh twat) in Manhunter. Or is it a hobby like that ropey guitarist in Queen? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Fatty Posted September 9, 2016 Report Share Posted September 9, 2016 15 hours ago, camberwell gypsy said: No its not. Quite right gyps, and who the fuck is Keef gobbler you soppy bint??? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Lady Penelope Posted September 9, 2016 Report Share Posted September 9, 2016 Farmers need the light in th morning Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted September 9, 2016 Report Share Posted September 9, 2016 38 minutes ago, Lady Penelope said: Farmers need the light in th morning farmers get enough grants to build their own fucking powerstation, so fuck the whinging bastards. They tell you to buy british, whilst driving their mercs, toyotas, and their mengele harvesters towed behind New fucking Holland tractors... fuck the fucking lot of them. And give me more hours in bed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted September 9, 2016 Report Share Posted September 9, 2016 9 minutes ago, DingTheRioja said: farmers get enough grants to build their own fucking powerstation, so fuck the whinging bastards. They tell you to buy british, whilst driving their mercs, toyotas, and their mengele harvesters towed behind New fucking Holland tractors... fuck the fucking lot of them. And give me more hours in bed. Get orf moi laaaaaaand! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted September 9, 2016 Report Share Posted September 9, 2016 Why do farmers want it light in the mornings? Are they too shit soft to make their Eastern European slaves work in the dark while they fuck off shooting peasants and badgers? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba C Posted September 9, 2016 Report Share Posted September 9, 2016 5 hours ago, DingTheRioja said: farmers get enough grants to build their own fucking powerstation, so fuck the whinging bastards. They tell you to buy british, whilst driving their mercs, toyotas, and their mengele harvesters towed behind New fucking Holland tractors... fuck the fucking lot of them. And give me more hours in bed. They drive Toyotas? What is the world coming to? I hope the conglomerate of supermarkets known as the "Big 5" start paying them less for their milk. As soon as they realise that when purchasing potatoes they are actually just buying cold mash, there'll be riots. Dingthesheepdoggie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Quincy Cockfingers Posted September 9, 2016 Report Share Posted September 9, 2016 On 8 September 2016 at 1:40 PM, luke swarm said: "I see the nights are drawing in.....I have to put my headlights on in the mornings to go to work". Every year about this time we have endure this sort of pointless conversation from stupid cunts such as Mrs Swarm......yes I am aware that all these things that you say are occurring...they occur every year and have done so for at least my lifetime, don't know what sort of seasonal changeover there was before then but definitely as far as I have been alive. In about a months time we will continue this pointless conversations with the " why don't they just stop messing around with the clocks and leave it on summer time all year round" Inevitably there is always some smartarse cunt nearby who will then start harping on about farmers and the need for more daylight....can we get more daylight by getting up earlier...never really understood that argument. Brrr, going to have to switch on the heating soon. etc etc Soon, the world shall turn again , but that season shall signal your last, and the everlasting night of death shall draw in and pull you to its bosom. Locked in obsidian for ever. Shit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted September 9, 2016 Report Share Posted September 9, 2016 15 minutes ago, Quincy Cockfingers said: Soon, the world shall turn again , but that season shall signal your last, and the everlasting night of death shall draw in and pull you to its bosom. Locked in obsidian for ever. Shit. Yes shit indeed. I have a large blacksmith's vice that turns. I wish I had your head in it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Quincy Cockfingers Posted September 9, 2016 Report Share Posted September 9, 2016 9 minutes ago, witheredscrote said: Yes shit indeed. I have a large blacksmith's vice that turns. I wish I had your head in it. Are you sure it can accommodate a head this big? Perhaps you should place your own therein, and bid Mrs Withers aid- in sure she loves you dearly and would not dream of pulping your insolent melon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted September 9, 2016 Report Share Posted September 9, 2016 1 hour ago, Bubba C said: They drive Toyotas? What is the world coming to? I hope the conglomerate of supermarkets known as the "Big 5" start paying them less for their milk. As soon as they realise that when purchasing potatoes they are actually just buying cold mash, there'll be riots. Dingthesheepdoggie Toyota Hilux, or them other big fuckoff shitty doublecab pickups every builder seems to buy as well, despite them only ever having 1 passenger in or carrying a couple of bags of sand in, which would fit in any car. I remember having to tow one of those daft cunts out of a field once, he'd got stuck and couldn't move the fucker, buried the wheels 6" down in mud before remembering it was 4x4, too late... I only had my crappy Ford Shopping Trolley at the time, wish I'd had a camera to video the cunt. Potatoes are uncooked mash, not just cold mash. Prick. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest luke swarm Posted September 9, 2016 Report Share Posted September 9, 2016 3 hours ago, Quincy Cockfingers said: Soon, the world shall turn again , but that season shall signal your last, and the everlasting night of death shall draw in and pull you to its bosom. Locked in obsidian for ever. Shit. I hope not, I've got a fortnight on the Isle of Wight booked next July. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.