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Christmas cards


Eddie

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It getting near to that time of year when the annoying phenomenon of Christmas junk mail starts to arrive through your door. Unwanted cards from distant relatives you have long since lost contact with. The cunt who includes a letter setting out their children's achievements in the last year and the obligatory card from a complete mystery that no one has ever heard of . I'm doing my cards now

 

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I started a topic in the old site similar to this but I nommed those cunts who send you a home made card with pictures of their fucking family,taken in the summer but with Christmas hats on. Complete egotistical cunts that have also been known to write a short letter about their adventures as if written by a third party.

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I leave it to Mrs Manky. I haven't sent a card for very many years. Besides, I have always been shit with names. "Happy Christmas you cunt from Manky and her that lives at our house" doesn't seem quite right. Opening them is just as bad. The disappointment not to find wads of dosh is a fucker.

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45 minutes ago, Eddie said:

It getting near to that time of year when the annoying phenomenon of Christmas junk mail starts to arrive through your door. Unwanted cards from distant relatives you have long since lost contact with. The cunt who includes a letter setting out their children's achievements in the last year and the obligatory card from a complete mystery that no one has ever heard of . I'm doing my cards now

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Frank's postman is going to hate you, Ed. 

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Guest Alfie Noakes
9 minutes ago, nobgobbler said:

I only send cards to people I like. A multipack of 10 lasts me two years. Bargain.

Only two years, I get ten out of one of those and I send those to myself.

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Guest nobgobbler
1 minute ago, Alfie Noakes said:

Only two years, I get ten out of one of those and I send those to myself.

That's rather frugal of you Alf. On year 10 you can use the empty box and the satin ribbon bow to send yourself a present.

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2 minutes ago, nobgobbler said:

Oh yes, just yesterday. And every house brick smothered in lights. Chav cunts.

They've probably been there all year round Gobbers. They just plugged them in now they've topped up their electric key.

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Guest DingTheRioja
4 hours ago, Eddie said:

It getting near to that time of year when the annoying phenomenon of Christmas junk mail starts to arrive through your door. Unwanted cards from distant relatives you have long since lost contact with. The cunt who includes a letter setting out their children's achievements in the last year and the obligatory card from a complete mystery that no one has ever heard of . I'm doing my cards now

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Where's mine? 3rd on the left?

2 hours ago, camberwell gypsy said:

Anybody seen a Christmas tree in a house yet.

Yes, 3 of the cunts, 1 of which was early last week.... fucking 20-something of November ffs... unfortunately there were no loose bricks lying around for me to wrap in nice crinkly gold paper for them...

3 hours ago, camberwell gypsy said:

Hated cards from people at work because then I have to give them one. Worse is the cunt who gives you a card right when they are leaving work for the last time before Christmas which leaves one with a guilty feeling that I didn't give them one. Don't get me started on secret santa either.

The only secret santa I ever remember liking was when someone got given a box of ribbed and flavoured condoms. and they had to open it in the middle of about 50 colleagues with the directors there.... the funniest bit was he was the cunt who shagged half the fugly munters in the office.... none of the "nice" girls ever went near him, just the chav slags...

More than one or two red faces that day, and not from excessive sherry consumption..

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29 minutes ago, DingTheRioja said:

Where's mine? 3rd on the left?

Yes, 3 of the cunts, 1 of which was early last week.... fucking 20-something of November ffs... unfortunately there were no loose bricks lying around for me to wrap in nice crinkly gold paper for them...

The only secret santa I ever remember liking was when someone got given a box of ribbed and flavoured condoms. and they had to open it in the middle of about 50 colleagues with the directors there.... the funniest bit was he was the cunt who shagged half the fugly munters in the office.... none of the "nice" girls ever went near him, just the chav slags...

More than one or two red faces that day, and not from excessive sherry consumption..

Hated Xmas do's. Luckily 2 of them I was on duty so couldn't go. Christmas day on duty was better than spending with family strangely enough. Although carrying out CPR while wearing a reindeer hate took the fucking biscuit 

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6 hours ago, Eddie said:

It getting near to that time of year when the annoying phenomenon of Christmas junk mail starts to arrive through your door. Unwanted cards from distant relatives you have long since lost contact with. The cunt who includes a letter setting out their children's achievements in the last year and the obligatory card from a complete mystery that no one has ever heard of . I'm doing my cards now

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Shouldn't there be one with poof on it, for Spunky?

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