Air shows cancelled for fear of terrorist attacks

[Eric Cuntman]

So, the majority of planned air shows have been binned around the country. The reason is that the local authorities cannot afford the extra security measures required in the current climate of Islamic terrorist threat. Perhaps a compromise might be this, we load up all the aircraft carriers with every bomber and jet fighter we can lay our hands on, sail them off to the Middle East, and fucking destroy Syria and any other cunting shithole that poses a threat. The resultant fireworks display could be streamed live to giant screens around the country. That way the public can have an air show far more entertaining than some fucking slapper from reality TV doing a wing walk on a bi-plane, and the world will become a safer place in the process.

[Bubba C]

May I be the first of many who shall read this nom and then proceed to call you a stupid fucking cunt, you stupid fucking cunt.  

[Eddie]

2 minutes ago, Bubba C said:

May I be the first of many who shall read this nom and then proceed to call you a stupid fucking cunt, you stupid fucking cunt.  

Exactly bubs, you only need to fly them to Luton.

[Eric Cuntman]

9 minutes ago, Bubba C said:

May I be the first of many who shall read this nom and then proceed to call you a stupid fucking cunt, you stupid fucking cunt.  

And may I be the first of many to wish you a home visit from a swarthy bearded man wearing a Semtex body warmer.

[Eric Cuntman]

9 minutes ago, Eddie said:

Exactly bubs, you only need to fly them to Luton.

And Cardiff.

[Roadkill]

Air shows are for fags. Thats why Sunderland has one every year.

[Guest Lady Penelope]

12 minutes ago, Eddie said:

Exactly bubs, you only need to fly them to Luton.

Not sure of you end game here, but you have missed Huddersfield, Leeds and Bradford out. Indeed for good measure you need to nuke all of Yorkshire and probably the whole of Manchester and Lancashire as well.

[Eric Cuntman]

4 minutes ago, Roadkill said:

Air shows are for fags. Thats why Sunderland has one every year.

Lady P is apparently doing requests again, see if you can get her to point the finger of doom at the Mackems as well.

[Decimus]

4 minutes ago, Roadkill said:

Air shows are for fags. Thats why Sunderland has one every year.

Don't sully the site by uttering the name of that foul pit of destitution and poverty. Mackems have eyes as dead as Baron Samedi and the whole place absolutely fucking stinks of microwaveable Rustler burgers. I spent half a day there five years ago and I still have flashbacks every time I see the thunderous sausage skin thighs of a fat slapper with a multi-seat perambulator.

[Guest Wizardsleeve]

The threat is real and verifiable!

 

[Roadkill]

5 minutes ago, Decimus said:

Don't sully the site by uttering the name of that foul pit of destitution and poverty. Mackems have eyes as dead as Baron Samedi and the whole place absolutely fucking stinks of microwaveable Rustler burgers. I spent half a day there five years ago and I still have flashbacks every time I see the thunderous sausage skin thighs of a fat slapper with a multi-seat perambulator.

I'm sorry, Decs. I truly am. Last time I went there there was a bunch of ratty looking chavs swimming in the duck shit filled pond at the park and a horrendously fat single mother screaming at her four year old child because he kept crying about his sun burn. Was the main street still a horribly cobbled piece of "art" with every third piece missing? I'm a Geordie so I only ever went once as a child before they could justify murdering me on sight for being the superior race.

[Roadkill]

14 minutes ago, Wizardsleeve said:

The threat is real and verifiable!

 

Stupid bastard missed the red target spot by a mile.

[Guest Wizardsleeve]

4 minutes ago, Roadkill said:

Stupid bastard missed the red target spot by a mile.

But he did take out the Special needs care facility.  

[Roadkill]

Just now, Wizardsleeve said:

But he did take out the Special needs care facility.  

Spackers don't burn. Too much drool, you see.

[Guest Wizardsleeve]

1 minute ago, Roadkill said:

Spackers don't burn. Too much drool, you see.

If there is a god, the core to the 10 megaton cruise missile cracked and the fuckers will glow in the dark until they fucking kick off.  

[Guest I know that Cunt]

1 hour ago, Eric Cuntman said:

So, the majority of planned air shows have been binned around the country. The reason is that the local authorities cannot afford the extra security measures required in the current climate of Islamic terrorist threat. Perhaps a compromise might be this, we load up all the aircraft carriers with every bomber and jet fighter we can lay our hands on, sail them off to the Middle East, and fucking destroy Syria and any other cunting shithole that poses a threat. The resultant fireworks display could be streamed live to giant screens around the country. That way the public can have an air show far more entertaining than some fucking slapper from reality TV doing a wing walk on a bi-plane, and the world will become a safer place in the process.

Eric great nom.

With any luck President Donald will do just that.

[camberwell gypsy]

1 hour ago, Eric Cuntman said:

So, the majority of planned air shows have been binned around the country. The reason is that the local authorities cannot afford the extra security measures required in the current climate of Islamic terrorist threat. Perhaps a compromise might be this, we load up all the aircraft carriers with every bomber and jet fighter we can lay our hands on, sail them off to the Middle East, and fucking destroy Syria and any other cunting shithole that poses a threat. The resultant fireworks display could be streamed live to giant screens around the country. That way the public can have an air show far more entertaining than some fucking slapper from reality TV doing a wing walk on a bi-plane, and the world will become a safer place in the process.

Fuck off Eric. I enjoy my hobby of bi-plane wing walking. 

[Guest Lady Penelope]

Punker's hates air shows. He once went to one where there were bombers but he thought they said bummers.

[Eric Cuntman]

3 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said:

Fuck off Eric. I enjoy my hobby of bi-plane wing walking. 

I fucking knew that was you playing the third drunken tart on the left in last weeks TOWIE.

[camberwell gypsy]

5 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

I fucking knew that was you playing the third drunken tart on the left in last weeks TOWIE.

You think I'd go anywhere near Essex?

[Eric Cuntman]

33 minutes ago, I know that Cunt said:

Eric great nom.

With any luck President Donald will do just that.

The only problem with the Yanks spearheading an attack on the Middle East is that the UK is almost certainly going to be hit by some stray ordnance in 'friendly fire incidents', we shall just have to tough it out in the underground stations and have a sing-song and a few mugs of Bovril.

[Roadkill]

Just now, Eric Cuntman said:

The only problem with the Yanks spearheading an attack on the Middle East is that the UK is almost certainly going to be hit by some stray ordnance in 'friendly fire incidents', we shall just have to tough it out in the underground stations and have a sing-song and a few mugs of Bovril.

Don't forget your gas mask. The asbestos filters will keep you safe.

[Guest Snatch]

2 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

The only problem with the Yanks spearheading an attack on the Middle East is that the UK is almost certainly going to be hit by some stray ordnance in 'friendly fire incidents', we shall just have to tough it out in the underground stations and have a sing-song and a few mugs of Bovril.

Why doesn't everyone tell the USA to fuck off and learn how to fight their own wars.

[Guest Manky]

How long before our leaders close all pubs, stop selling pork and ban Christmas on public safety grounds?  They are promoting their own agenda using ISIS as an excuse. Fucking appeasers.

The best form of defence is attack. Fire up the Sopwith Camels and unleash the Dreadnoughts.

[Eric Cuntman]

1 minute ago, Snatch said:

Why don't the everyone tell the USA to fuck off and learn how to fight their own wars.

They do try and fight their own wars, he trouble is they usually kill more allies than enemies, or jump in at the last minute and claim responsibility for the victory.