Guest nobgobbler Posted March 11, 2017 Report Share Posted March 11, 2017 37 minutes ago, DingTheRioja said: I've seen some videos about the plumber coming round, never heard it called replacing the boiler... It could be the same one, he looks a bit of a shifty cunt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted March 11, 2017 Report Share Posted March 11, 2017 Briefly on topic, I have now seen this advert and frankly I am appalled that we continue to suffer so-called "Marketing Professionals" to live. They should all be hung from the nearest lamp post, just as soon as the lawyers have been cut down and set on fire. If by some happy chance I ever meet the cunts responsible for the latest series of Andrex adverts I will visit such horrors upon them that they will beg me for death. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Lady Penelope Posted March 11, 2017 Report Share Posted March 11, 2017 If using glossy paper to wipe your arse it is best to crumple said paper first. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest nobgobbler Posted March 11, 2017 Report Share Posted March 11, 2017 Here's one. If you buy the latest Braun OralB electric toothbrush for just short of £300, your iphone will tell you how well you are brushing your teeth. Because you really need it to do that don't you. Probably invented so spying cunts who tap into your phone can watch you having a shit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted March 11, 2017 Author Report Share Posted March 11, 2017 2 minutes ago, nobgobbler said: Here's one. If you buy the latest Braun OralB electric toothbrush for just short of £300, your iphone will tell you how well you are brushing your teeth. Because you really need it to do that don't you. What about the 'Blanx' toothpaste advert. The tube has an LED on the end so that you can shine it on your teeth. Just imagine what that would be used for if you left a tube in the presence of Punkape. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted March 11, 2017 Report Share Posted March 11, 2017 11 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said: A very British form of toilet etiquette is what I like to call, 'the courtesy hammock' this is when you are a guest in someone else's house and in the unfortunate position of needing a dump. The 'hammock' is the wad of loo roll you chuck down the pan first so your hosts don't hear your splashdown. Another advantage I can foresee of this hammock method is that all subsequent shit is now sitting on a kind of magic carpet, which might allow it easy passage without leaving huge, shitty streaks on the pan. Particularly useful if the cunt whose house it is doesn't have a bog brush available. Must try it. Good work, Eric. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest nobgobbler Posted March 11, 2017 Report Share Posted March 11, 2017 36 minutes ago, Witheredscrote said: What about the 'Blanx' toothpaste advert. The tube has an LED on the end so that you can shine it on your teeth. Just imagine what that would be used for if you left a tube in the presence of Punkape. His arse shining like a beacon enroute to his nearest A&E. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest nobgobbler Posted March 11, 2017 Report Share Posted March 11, 2017 22 minutes ago, Ape said: Another advantage I can foresee of this hammock method is that all subsequent shit is now sitting on a kind of magic carpet, which might allow it easy passage without leaving huge, shitty streaks on the pan. Particularly useful if the cunt whose house it is doesn't have a bog brush available. Must try it. Good work, Eric. Be careful not to overdo it though if you're unfamiliar with the effectiveness of the flush. Too much andrex and you've got yourself a rim lapper. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ratcum Posted March 11, 2017 Report Share Posted March 11, 2017 27 minutes ago, nobgobbler said: Be careful not to overdo it though if you're unfamiliar with the effectiveness of the flush. Too much andrex and you've got yourself a rim lapper. hopeless mango Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted March 11, 2017 Report Share Posted March 11, 2017 5 hours ago, Cuntybaws said: You're closer than you might think! I've got the fucking theme tune stuck in my head now, an earworm that will probably be there all weekend. Still, I don't see why I should suffer alone... Ah, now your previous posts make sense and I now see that you haven't gone completely batshit insane. I hadn't heard of this crap before, but watching that it reminds me of a weird version of 'the red hand gang'. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted March 11, 2017 Report Share Posted March 11, 2017 18 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said: A very British form of toilet etiquette is what I like to call, 'the courtesy hammock' this is when you are a guest in someone else's house and in the unfortunate position of needing a dump. The 'hammock' is the wad of loo roll you chuck down the pan first so your hosts don't hear your splashdown. Also useful if you don't want your undercarriage splashed as well Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted March 11, 2017 Report Share Posted March 11, 2017 11 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: Also useful if you don't want your undercarriage splashed as well Good point, nobody wants chocolate coated nuts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted March 11, 2017 Report Share Posted March 11, 2017 18 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said: Good point, nobody wants chocolate coated nuts. I wouldn't have that problem Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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