Guest 'eavensabove Posted August 2, 2018 Report Share Posted August 2, 2018 (edited) Many a man throughout the UK decides to become a Battler. Armed with a variety of painted dustbin-lids for shields, a Plywood cutlass each and adapted saucepans on their heads, they elect who will be 'Admiral of The Day' and then dash about aimlessly to re-enact 'The Battle of The Little Big Horn' for example or 'The Charge of The Light Brigade' with one horse to share amongst a legion of 7 idiots. Meanwhile, their hideous-looking wives dressed up to the nines to resemble something or other from the c16th try their level best to knock-up a lunch from whatever grows upon the Battlefield, and an OXO cube, whilst making serving bowls from Willow twigs. Some of these daffy cunts have day jobs, for fucksakes, and will only transform themselves with all manner of regalia at weekends, to play Vikings at The Battle Club. Others will groom any Bootlips they can get their hands on, to add a more realistic spectacle to a 'Rorke's Drift' extravaganza in the foothills of the Cotswold's... Edited August 2, 2018 by 'eavensabove Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PANZER MURPHY Posted August 2, 2018 Report Share Posted August 2, 2018 Boot lips...laffin Panzerknacker Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Couldn't give a shit Posted August 2, 2018 Report Share Posted August 2, 2018 4 minutes ago, Panzerknacker said: Boot lips...laffin Panzerknacker It's a shame they can't re-enact the siege of Drogheda using real weapons and townsfolk. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penny Farthing Posted August 2, 2018 Report Share Posted August 2, 2018 5 minutes ago, Panzerknacker said: Boot lips...laffin Panzerknacker Germany calling! Germany calling! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted August 2, 2018 Report Share Posted August 2, 2018 39 minutes ago, Couldn't give a shit said: It's a shame they can't re-enact the siege of Drogheda using real weapons and townsfolk. It's a shame they can't re-enact the bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki using Cork and Limerick, but I fear that would fall foul of authenticity guidelines. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PANZER MURPHY Posted August 2, 2018 Report Share Posted August 2, 2018 43 minutes ago, Couldn't give a shit said: It's a shame they can't re-enact the siege of Drogheda using real weapons and townsfolk. They could load your flabby aids ridden carcass into a trebuchet an fling it over the wall with its fluids leaking from every hole God put in ya panzerknacker 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penny Farthing Posted August 2, 2018 Report Share Posted August 2, 2018 6 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said: It's a shame they can't re-enact the bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki using Cork and Limerick, but I fear that would fall foul of authenticity guidelines. Panzer is also making me wish that I did not vote REMAIN, (although I did not vote REMAIN). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Couldn't give a shit Posted August 2, 2018 Report Share Posted August 2, 2018 1 minute ago, Panzerknacker said: They could load your flabby aids ridden carcass into a trebuchet an fling it over the wall with its fluids leaking from every hole God put in ya panzerknacker We had excellent cannon by the standard of the day so it wouldn't be necessary. Perhaps it's just your need to engage in the popular Irish pastime of wallowing in victimhood that brought to the conclusion that we could ever engage in such distasteful forms of warfare. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PANZER MURPHY Posted August 2, 2018 Report Share Posted August 2, 2018 12 minutes ago, Couldn't give a shit said: We had excellent cannon by the standard of the day so it wouldn't be necessary. Perhaps it's just your need to engage in the popular Irish pastime of wallowing in victimhood that brought to the conclusion that we could ever engage in such distasteful forms of warfare. Spose they could have loaded yer lumpen misshapen form into a crudely cast mortar and fired it face first at the wall ..terrify the natives into thinking ya had galloping leprosy Panzerknacker Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PANZER MURPHY Posted August 2, 2018 Report Share Posted August 2, 2018 29 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said: It's a shame they can't re-enact the bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki using Cork and Limerick, but I fear that would fall foul of authenticity guidelines. I'd advise using neutron bombs..we want the structures intact not the inhabitants panzerknacker Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Couldn't give a shit Posted August 2, 2018 Report Share Posted August 2, 2018 18 minutes ago, Panzerknacker said: Spose they could have loaded yer lumpen misshapen form into a crudely cast mortar and fired it face first at the wall ..terrify the natives into thinking ya had galloping leprosy Panzerknacker Any more of your insolence and we will send in the tans. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PANZER MURPHY Posted August 2, 2018 Report Share Posted August 2, 2018 Just now, Couldn't give a shit said: Any more of your insolence and we will send in the tans. Mm..you've plenty of tans in the UK alright..and they aren't going anywhere Laffin panzerknacker Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Alfie Noakes Posted August 2, 2018 Report Share Posted August 2, 2018 1 hour ago, Slippers said: Panzer is also making me wish that I did not vote REMAIN, (although I did not vote REMAIN). Well it worked on me. I was genuinely pissed off at leaving Europe, but I accept the result and if no new referenda are held then we must cut the coat tails of Europe and stand alone. Not grasp at straws being a servile non active member of the bloat. We have local/county/(national) and Westminster ruling over us and an old doddery bat figurehead, we need no more governance than that. Fuck Brussels and fuck all the rest of the Euro behemoth. Let there be anarchy my friends, take back the streets! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Couldn't give a shit Posted August 2, 2018 Report Share Posted August 2, 2018 47 minutes ago, Panzerknacker said: Mm..you've plenty of tans in the UK alright..and they aren't going anywhere Laffin panzerknacker You won't be "laffin" when they burn your house to the ground. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PANZER MURPHY Posted August 2, 2018 Report Share Posted August 2, 2018 13 minutes ago, Couldn't give a shit said: You won't be "laffin" when they burn your house to the ground. The tans you have lots of prefer super soakers full of battery acid and stabbing each other Laffin Panzerknacker Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Posted August 2, 2018 Report Share Posted August 2, 2018 More repeat bollocks Battle re-enactment cunts By CCArchive, August 14, 2014 in CC Archives Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest 'eavensabove Posted August 2, 2018 Report Share Posted August 2, 2018 (edited) "Repeat Bollocks" says maestro 24 carat Neil. Nothing under his own belt, save for Punk Apes fresh spunk stains. Edited August 2, 2018 by 'eavensabove Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubby Pecker Posted August 2, 2018 Report Share Posted August 2, 2018 3 hours ago, Panzerknacker said: Mm..you've plenty of tans in the UK alright..and they aren't going anywhere Laffin panzerknacker All those tanned cunts coming to Great Britain will just be in transit to the Emerald Isle, on their way to the open arms of your half curry munching and whole bender leader. This is on the orders of you're paymasters the EU and I'm pretty sure the laid back nature of the mick will be tested when these cunts are calling for shariah law and the native slags to cover up. Im also pretty sure the room you where offering to me will be filled with 15 Somali goat herding technicians who'll be aiming to slit your fucking throat at the first opportunity 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted August 2, 2018 Report Share Posted August 2, 2018 26 minutes ago, Stubby Pecker said: All those tanned cunts coming to Great Britain will just be in transit to the Emerald Isle, on their way to the open arms of your half curry munching and whole bender leader. This is on the orders of you're paymasters the EU and I'm pretty sure the laid back nature of the mick will be tested when these cunts are calling for shariah law and the native slags to cover up. Im also pretty sure the room you where offering to me will be filled with 15 Somali goat herding technicians who'll be aiming to slit your fucking throat at the first opportunity I prefer the Ireland of old. Staunchly Roman Catholic, fanatically invested in blowing up paras, openly collaborating with Nazis and a force to be reckoned with in the Eurovision Song Contest. The Ireland of today with Gunga Din at the helm has its arse firmly wedged upon the thrusting cock of the EU. An Ireland that panders to outsiders and slappers who do not want to face the consequences of a night of unprotected sex is anathema to me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PANZER MURPHY Posted August 2, 2018 Report Share Posted August 2, 2018 Listening to a doco on the wireless last night about our huge Syrian refugee programme..we stuck 300 of them in a hotel in balhagaderreen Co.roscommon a year ago..each one professed a wish to join family in the UK as soon as their papers came through..long live the 1922 common travel act tween our great nation's Laffin panzerknacker Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted August 2, 2018 Report Share Posted August 2, 2018 6 hours ago, Couldn't give a shit said: It's a shame they can't re-enact the siege of Drogheda using real weapons and townsfolk. Shame they can't re-enact the bombing of Hiroshima with a real atom bomb in Edenbridge* *I would like to apologise to anybody living in Edenbridge. It must be fucking hell for them Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest 'eavensabove Posted August 2, 2018 Report Share Posted August 2, 2018 1 hour ago, camberwell gypsy said: Shame they can't re-enact the bombing of Hiroshima with a real atom bomb in Edenbridge* *I would like to apologise to anybody living in Edenbridge. It must be fucking hell for them Edenbridge, in the garden of Kent, aint so bad. Adams Bridge, on the other hand is total shite., and as for Eves-Bridge? Who gives a fuck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
White Cunt Posted August 2, 2018 Report Share Posted August 2, 2018 3 hours ago, Decimus said: I prefer the Ireland of old. Staunchly Roman Catholic, fanatically invested in blowing up paras, openly collaborating with Nazis and a force to be reckoned with in the Eurovision Song Contest. The Ireland of today with Gunga Din at the helm has its arse firmly wedged upon the thrusting cock of the EU. An Ireland that panders to outsiders and slappers who do not want to face the consequences of a night of unprotected sex is anathema to me. Cheap and plentiful flow of potatoes from the EU is responsible for that behaviour, Decs. Can’t really blame them for it. You cut off the EU source and the fuckers will starve. Again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubby Pecker Posted August 2, 2018 Report Share Posted August 2, 2018 9 hours ago, 'eavensabove said: Many a man throughout the UK decides to become a Battler. Armed with a variety of painted dustbin-lids for shields, a Plywood cutlass each and adapted saucepans on their heads, they elect who will be 'Admiral of The Day' and then dash about aimlessly to re-enact 'The Battle of The Little Big Horn' for example or 'The Charge of The Light Brigade' with one horse to share amongst a legion of 7 idiots. Meanwhile, their hideous-looking wives dressed up to the nines to resemble something or other from the c16th try their level best to knock-up a lunch from whatever grows upon the Battlefield, and an OXO cube, whilst making serving bowls from Willow twigs. Some of these daffy cunts have day jobs, for fucksakes, and will only transform themselves with all manner of regalia at weekends, to play Vikings at The Battle Club. Others will groom any Bootlips they can get their hands on, to add a more realistic spectacle to a 'Rorke's Drift' extravaganza in the foothills of the Cotswold's... I've got no issue with folk being interested in actual real history that actually really happened, it's the weird fucking cunts that seem to be attracted to these gathering who should be instantly killed with a broad sword. I've attended Tewkesbury medieval fair a couple of times, site of one of the pivotal battles in the war of the roses and part of our heritage. But fuck me, walking around its full of beardy weirdy lord of the rings cunts who believe in dragons, pixies and hobbits and are dressed accordingly. If these wankers were around at the time of the actual events they would have been burnt at the stake. Where's Vincent Price the witch finder general when you need him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
White Cunt Posted August 2, 2018 Report Share Posted August 2, 2018 2 minutes ago, Stubby Pecker said: I've got no issue with folk being interested in actual real history that actually really happened, it's the weird fucking cunts that seem to be attracted to these gathering who should be instantly killed with a broad sword. I've attended Tewkesbury medieval fair a couple of times, site of one of the pivotal battles in the war of the roses and part of our heritage. But fuck me, walking around its full of beardy weirdy lord of the rings cunts who believe in dragons, pixies and hobbits and are dressed accordingly. If these wankers were around at the time of the actual events they would have been burnt at the stake. Where's Vincent Price the witch finder general when you need him. I have no problem with these infantile doughnuts, looking for a bit of adrenaline kick, by fighting some dragon battles with sticks, in the middle of Cheshire. It’s much more preferable to spats of glassing at my local, which can ruin a peaceful pint. And yes, I have been told to upgrade to better outlets, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.