Cunts Who Eat With Their Mouths Open

[Ape™️]

Not an awful lot to add to this really - the title says it all. I can’t fucking stand uncouth slobs who do this - it makes my flesh crawl. I’ve tried checking whether or not it’s repeat bollocks, but haven’t found any conclusive results. I therefore issue a preemptive fuck off and die, to any determined pedants with fuck all better to do with their shit-cunt fucking lives.

Fuck off.

[camberwell gypsy]

Or fuckers who have a mayonnaise/sauce globule to the side of their gob and keep fucking talking. As they talk the fucking globule begins its slow southernly journey. 

[Neil]

I personally find it very fucking difficult to eat with my mouth closed,have you a hole in your cheek or do you snort all your food up your cavernous bugle?

[Ape™️]

9 minutes ago, Neil said:

I personally find it very fucking difficult to eat with my mouth closed,have you a hole in your cheek or do you snort all your food up your cavernous bugle?

Stick to being a depraved, filthy fucking pervert, Neil, and stay away from attempts at humour.

[Neil]

OK you miserable fucker

[scotty]

These cunts are nearly as bad as the fucking animals who insist on talking through a gobful of food. For examples, see any American film. 

[Guest 'eavensabove]

18 hours ago, Iam Ape said:

Not an awful lot to add to this really - the title says it all. I can’t fucking stand uncouth slobs who do this - it makes my flesh crawl. I’ve tried checking whether or not it’s repeat bollocks, but haven’t found any conclusive results. I therefore issue a preemptive fuck off and die, to any determined pedants with fuck all better to do with their shit-cunt fucking lives.

Fuck off.

Many of these vile cretins can be both heard and seen at 'Greasy Spoon' Cafes and the likes. Stuffing their faces with Bubbles & Squeakers and all manner of shite whilst the cunts should be tarmacking the Streets. Their eating habits are akin to a flock of vultures upon a maggot infested carcass. Swigging mugs of tea with a mouth-filled with crap, whilst snorting, farting, belching and spilling the beans, about their last nights' shag with some whore from the boozer across the road, and calling for another 'Fried Slice' to mop up their snot & congealed egg-yolk with.  And that, is The Paris Ritz Hotel for yer. 

[Guest Wizardsleeve]

The open mouthers are barbaric cunts at best.  They laugh when their awful sprog gape their gobs with masticated shit, which if I'm honest, is a sight that would put vultures off off a fresh Serengeti kill.  The type that makes me want to reach out and slap a cunt, are the ones who claim to be ill, and unable to breathe through their beaks.  What the fuck are they out in public for?  

They're all vile, disgusting bastard shit cunts. 

[Eric Cuntman]

56 minutes ago, 'eavensabove said:

Many of these vile cretins can be both heard and seen at 'Greasy Spoon' Cafes and the likes. Stuffing their faces with Bubbles & Squeakers and all manner of shite whilst the cunts should be tarmacking the Streets. Their eating habits are akin to a flock of vultures upon a maggot infested carcass. Swigging mugs of tea with a mouth-filled with crap, whilst snorting, farting, belching and spilling the beans, about their last nights' shag with some whore from the boozer across the road, and calling for another 'Fried Slice' to mop up their snot & congealed egg-yolk with.  And that, is The Paris Ritz Hotel for yer. 

The combination of egg yolk, baked bean juice and brown sauce, mopped up with buttered white bread, is without doubt, the apex of gastronomic majesty.

anyone who disagrees is clearly, either a disgusting unwashed vegan, or a massive fucking faggot.

Probably both.

[PANZER MURPHY]

19 hours ago, Iam Ape said:

Not an awful lot to add to this really - the title says it all. I can’t fucking stand uncouth slobs who do this - it makes my flesh crawl. I’ve tried checking whether or not it’s repeat bollocks, but haven’t found any conclusive results. I therefore issue a preemptive fuck off and die, to any determined pedants with fuck all better to do with their shit-cunt fucking lives.

Fuck off.

Go out and take the leaves out of the pool before she takes her morning dip you cunt..you think because you paid for this holiday that it's yours?

Panzerknacker 

[Guest Wizardsleeve]

13 minutes ago, Panzerknacker said:

Go out and take the leaves out of the pool before she takes her morning dip you cunt..you think because you paid for this holiday that it's yours?

Panzerknacker 

Be so kind as to go out and drown yourself in the pool, Panzy baby!  

[PANZER MURPHY]

9 minutes ago, Wizardsleeve said:

Be so kind as to go out and drown yourself in the pool, Panzy baby!  

I'm a great swimmer..id say you'd sink like a rock tied to a bigger rock 

Laffin 

panzerknacker 

[Guest Drew P Pissflaps]

2 minutes ago, Panzerknacker said:

I'm a great swimmer..id say you'd sink like a rock tied to a bigger rock 

Laffin 

panzerknacker 

To be a great swimmer you need to learn when to keep your mouth closed. I can't imagine you're much good at that Spansy.

Larf-in.

Droopy

[Ape™️]

1 minute ago, Drew P Pissflaps said:

To be a great swimmer you need to learn when to keep your mouth closed. I can't imagine you're much good at that Spansy.

Larf-in.

Droopy

 His balaclava would make breathing very difficult too. Hopefully it’d make it impossible.

[Decimus]

3 hours ago, Neil said:

I personally find it very fucking difficult to eat with my mouth closed,have you a hole in your cheek or do you snort all your food up your cavernous bugle?

I can imagine the dining arrangements at Chez Neil, and without preamble I would like to say that it turns my fucking stomach. Eschewing the use of a table, I can picture you lying flat on your stomach atop your soiled raping-mattress, your fat fucking gob snapping open and shut like a Hungry Hippo as you shovel and inhale vast quantities of doner meat and chips, the noise emanating from you akin to a broken down Henry Hoover.

Vile fucking pig.

 

[Guest 'eavensabove]

1 hour ago, Eric Cuntman said:

The combination of egg yolk, baked bean juice and brown sauce, mopped up with buttered white bread, is without doubt, the apex of gastronomic majesty.

anyone who disagrees is clearly, either a disgusting unwashed vegan, or a massive fucking faggot.

Probably both.

I must be disgusting then. 

[Neil]

23 minutes ago, Decimus said:

I can imagine the dining arrangements at Chez Neil, and without preamble I would like to say that it turns my fucking stomach. Eschewing the use of a table, I can picture you lying flat on your stomach atop your soiled raping-mattress, your fat fucking gob snapping open and shut like a Hungry Hippo as you shovel and inhale vast quantities of doner meat and chips, the noise emanating from you akin to a broken down Henry Hoover.

Vile fucking pig.

 

Fuck all that,What about the fucking pikeys moving in to my village? You government working leftie fuckers need to grow some and house the fuckers nearer Yarmouth where they fucking belong.There's a meal in it at mine if you can sort it,there's a good chap

[Eric Cuntman]

5 minutes ago, 'eavensabove said:

I must be disgusting then. 

I've had my suspicions.

[Ape™️]

3 minutes ago, Neil said:

Fuck all that,What about the fucking pikeys moving in to my village? You government working leftie fuckers need to grow some and house the fuckers nearer Yarmouth where they fucking belong.There's a meal in it at mine if you can sort it,there's a good chap

Beware this dangerous euphemism, @Decimus - you’ll be in a cage and living on a diet of spunk before you know what’s happening. 

[Guest 'eavensabove]

7 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

I've had my suspicions.

Never been one for snotty eggs. I take mine hard-boiled, and the wife takes Hers unfertilised.  

[Decimus]

10 minutes ago, Neil said:

Fuck all that,What about the fucking pikeys moving in to my village? You government working leftie fuckers need to grow some and house the fuckers nearer Yarmouth where they fucking belong.There's a meal in it at mine if you can sort it,there's a good chap

I actually sympathise with you. The useless shower of shits at South Norfolk District Council, especially their planning department, are an absolute fucking disgrace.

Do not fear though, my chubby little friend, they are in the process of entering into a collaboration with my own superior organisation. I take it that you have lodged an appeal? Now we are sharing data, I'm guessing it will take me a matter of seconds to sniff you out should that be the case.

Expect shit through your letterbox within the week.

[Guest 'eavensabove]

8 minutes ago, Decimus said:

I actually sympathise with you. The useless shower of shits at South Norfolk District Council, especially their planning department, are an absolute fucking disgrace.

Do not fear though, my chubby little friend, they are in the process of entering into a collaboration with my own superior organisation. I take it that you have lodged an appeal? Now we are sharing data, I'm guessing it will take me a matter of seconds to sniff you out should that be the case.

Expect shit through your letterbox within the week.

Wish I'd thought of that. As the crow fly's I could lob turds at the fat-fucker via the A14  

Cancel that. If you know Chubbys' place of abode, have a ton of rhino-shit manure dumped in his drive.

I've PM'd you the number for Turds R Us... No Jobs too small for 'em. Order 50 Pizza Home Deliveries to the cunt too whilst you're at it. 50 pizzas, from 50 different outlets with as many Indian & Chinese deliveries. Cause havoc at the cunts doorstep. Oh, a crate of Locusts from your local Reptile store will also do the trick.  Trust me, I did it to a cunt in Ozzie land when he ripped me off.    

Edited August 6, 2018 by 'eavensabove

[Neil]

19 minutes ago, Decimus said:

I actually sympathise with you. The useless shower of shits at South Norfolk District Council, especially their planning department, are an absolute fucking disgrace.

Do not fear though, my chubby little friend, they are in the process of entering into a collaboration with my own superior organisation. I take it that you have lodged an appeal? Now we are sharing data, I'm guessing it will take me a matter of seconds to sniff you out should that be the case.

Expect shit through your letterbox within the week.

I'll have it DNA tested,if it's got squirrel in it then the pikey cunts got someone to read my appeal out to them,if it's a mixture of carrot and spunk expect a knock on your door.

[Stubby Pecker]

2 hours ago, Wizardsleeve said:

The open mouthers are barbaric cunts at best.  They laugh when their awful sprog gape their gobs with masticated shit, which if I'm honest, is a sight that would put vultures off off a fresh Serengeti kill.  The type that makes me want to reach out and slap a cunt, are the ones who claim to be ill, and unable to breathe through their beaks.  What the fuck are they out in public for?  

They're all vile, disgusting bastard shit cunts. 

What really makes my shit hang sideways is fence sitting fuckers like you. 

 

[Guest Wizardsleeve]

3 hours ago, Panzerknacker said:

I'm a great swimmer..id say you'd sink like a rock tied to a bigger rock 

Laffin 

panzerknacker 

No, the manly deposit left in your back passage by the latino cabana boy contains great swimmers.  You are a cheap and common work shy cunt.