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Lost Teddy Bear appeals


Penny Farthing

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I am a mod on a couple of facebook sites covering diverse topics. On both sites cunts have posed appeals on behalf of "friends" asking if anyone has found their little brats teddy bear, woolly penguin, rabbit etc says that Mirrabelle of Crispin is devastate at the loss of little teddy, widgie (add names as applicable). Why can't the these cunting parents explain to Crispin that you fucking lose things, lose relatives etc and that it is part of life? Instead we end up with tough 40 year old blokes taking Woosie the rabbit to work and  crying their eyes out because they cannot handle the fact that their 92 years old great grandmother has popped her clogs or that Henry the toy poodle was found toes up at 15 years of age.

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If we're doing a lost and found thread, I'd like to put out my own appeal.

Lost: Disreputable solvent abusing estate agent. Aged anywhere between 45 and 72, grossly overweight, hair gone but has the look of a former ginger. Undoubtedly wearing a shit George Asda suit and a garish tie. Likes Sci-Fi and shitting in mouths. If found, please glass in throat.

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2 minutes ago, Decimus said:

If we're doing a lost and found thread, I'd like to put out my own appeal.

Lost: Disreputable solvent abusing estate agent. Aged anywhere between 45 and 72, grossly overweight, hair gone but has the look of a former ginger. Undoubtedly wearing a shit George Asda suit and a garish tie. Likes Sci-Fi and shitting in mouths. If found, please glass in throat.

Have you put it on LinkedIn? 

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It's these same soft cunts that think it's acceptable to wear a fucking onesie......a Paddington Bear or some other notionally cute / actually armpit one....in daylight....to the shops.

A hundred years ago, men of this age had a bayonet in their hands.

Now it's more likely to be a cock, a cappuccino or a selfie-stick.

Jesus Nigel Christ!

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Guest judgetwi
14 hours ago, Wybunbury Bertie said:

I am a mod on a couple of facebook sites covering diverse topics. 

You expect people to believe that some arsehole would come on here and brag about that ?

I don’t know what your game is but we have plenty of attention seeking saddos on here.

Good effort though, fair play.

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Guest Wizardsleeve
On ‎8‎/‎29‎/‎2018 at 1:11 AM, judgetwi said:

You expect people to believe that some arsehole would come on here and brag about that ?

I don’t know what your game is but we have plenty of attention seeking saddos on here.

Good effort though, fair play.

Your post should never have included any type of credit giving platitude.  That's not your style, Judgemeister.  Certainly unwarranted here considering the cunt you were addressing.  You should have shredded the pile of shit!  

Edited by Wizardsleeve
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On 8/28/2018 at 3:43 PM, Jiggerycock said:

It's these same soft cunts that think it's acceptable to wear a fucking onesie......a Paddington Bear or some other notionally cute / actually armpit one....in daylight....to the shops.

A hundred years ago, men of this age had a bayonet in their hands.

Now it's more likely to be a cock, a cappuccino or a selfie-stick.

Jesus Nigel Christ!

Selfie sticks are a fucking abomination. I went into Dubrovnik old town (where apparently they filmed Game of Thrones) last night and found hundreds of chinks wielding these fucking things. I had to do so much ducking and diving to avoid these things I felt I WAS in a fucking episode of the poxy programme. 

Marshall Hain is a cunt 

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7 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said:

Selfie sticks are a fucking abomination. I went into Dubrovnik old town (where apparently they filmed Game of Thrones) last night and found hundreds of chinks wielding these fucking things. I had to do so much ducking and diving to avoid these things I felt I WAS in a fucking episode of the poxy programme. 

Marshall Hain is a cunt 

If you're looking for somewhere quieter you should take the cable car from the old town up to the wonderful little restaurant perched atop the sheer hillside. Then throw yourself over the edge onto the jagged orange roofs far below and stop boring the tits off the rest of us, we've all been to fucking Dubrovnik you know. 

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12 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said:

Selfie sticks are a fucking abomination. I went into Dubrovnik old town (where apparently they filmed Game of Thrones) last night and found hundreds of chinks wielding these fucking things. I had to do so much ducking and diving to avoid these things I felt I WAS in a fucking episode of the poxy programme. 

Marshall Hain is a cunt 

Split is worth a visit if you’re down there, Gyps. You can get some good hearty food, and it’s one of those odd places that look better in the rain. I sent a postcard to my friends at the convent when I was there. 

Dear Mother Superior, I have concluded there is nothing like reclining after a good nosh and contemplating the fun you’ll have in a wet Split. 

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17 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said:

If you're looking for somewhere quieter you should take the cable car from the old town up to the wonderful little restaurant perched atop the sheer hillside. Then throw yourself over the edge onto the jagged orange roofs far below and stop boring the tits off the rest of us, we've all been to fucking Dubrovnik you know. 

Wouldn't the the cable car at Matlock be closer for her?

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8 hours ago, Cuntybaws said:

If you're looking for somewhere quieter you should take the cable car from the old town up to the wonderful little restaurant perched atop the sheer hillside. Then throw yourself over the edge onto the jagged orange roofs far below and stop boring the tits off the rest of us, we've all been to fucking Dubrovnik you know. 

I know you have. They haven't stopped talking about the lairey "English cunt". 

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10 hours ago, camberwell gypsy said:

Selfie sticks are a fucking abomination. I went into Dubrovnik old town (where apparently they filmed Game of Thrones) last night and found hundreds of chinks wielding these fucking things. I had to do so much ducking and diving to avoid these things I felt I WAS in a fucking episode of the poxy programme. 

Marshall Hain is a cunt 

It helps if you think of them as lightning rods for cunts

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