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Rural broadband


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Getting cunted off with the poxy thing. Whatever provider you use, the speed is third world, less than half a meg. Frequently cutting out and you get charged more than if you live in an urban area. No cunt wants to invest in upgrading the infrastructure to fibre optic lines, instead I am lumbered with the shitty copper lines. Super highway of information? More like the fucking M25 on Friday afternoon. Chronic cuntery with rashes.

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  • 9 months later...
Guest JackoTC

At last fucking BT have installed a new exchange box in my village. My 0.5 mb speed will be a thing of the past...........but not just yet. Because BT own and maintain the infrastructure the new infinity broadband is only available to BT customers, but Joe Cunt me is with sky. Since other wankers in my village have connected to the new infinity service my speed has now reduced even further. I now have 0.12 mb speed. It has taken 36 hours to download a programme 1 hour long on my sky box. Cunt. Fucking Cunt.

​Fuck me Props, don't download a 3 hour film or a fucking repeat will be on before you've downloaded it.

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Serves you right for choosing Murdoch you soppy cunt. Oh how I miss Fatty.

I feel your pain, Stickers, I'm in that same dark place without him. He was my guilty pleasure on this site. He may have trotted out the same catchphrase with all the tedious regularity of a foul mouthed parrot hooked on Ketamine. He may have had all the intelligence and conversational skills of a badger with special needs. But that boy fucking loved you like a brother. Come back, Fats, you despicable, incomprehensible cunt. This site has no soul without you.

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I feel your pain, Stickers, I'm in that same dark place without him. He was my guilty pleasure on this site. He may have trotted out the same catchphrase with all the tedious regularity of a foul mouthed parrot hooked on Ketamine. He may have had all the intelligence and conversational skills of a badger with special needs. But that boy fucking loved you like a brother. Come back, Fats, you despicable, incomprehensible cunt. This site has no soul without you.

The Catwoman hated fat people

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Guest Fatty

I feel your pain, Stickers, I'm in that same dark place without him. He was my guilty pleasure on this site. He may have trotted out the same catchphrase with all the tedious regularity of a foul mouthed parrot hooked on Ketamine. He may have had all the intelligence and conversational skills of a badger with special needs. But that boy fucking loved you like a brother. Come back, Fats, you despicable, incomprehensible cunt. This site has no soul without you.

​I'm still here, been busy keeping you lot safe on the streets, wankers!

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Guest Bill Stickers

​I'm still here, been busy keeping you lot safe on the streets, wankers!​

Another truly commendable profile picture Fatty. You may be a fucking cunt of the highest order, but I admire your candor.

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Guest Ahriman

Fucking right, 1 megabyte per second those fucking Yorkie charlatans at plusnet promised me! How in the fuck am I supposed to torrent Sasha Grey's entire back catalogue with a measly 50 kb per second average connection? "Try turning the router on and off again" my ass.

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Guest DingTheRioja

Fucking right, 1 megabyte per second those fucking Yorkie charlatans at plusnet promised me! How in the fuck am I supposed to torrent Sasha Grey's entire back catalogue with a measly 50 kb per second average connection? "Try turning the router on and off again" my ass.

​you might wanna check the settings in your torrent program... a few fiddles can work wonders...

....and another thing.. if you want to torrent or use BBC iPlayer, get the programs you want ready whenever you feel like it, and then set them downloading between 7am and about 2pm... if you try anything after tea time, the ISPs throttle the fuckk out of you because everyone is on it and you have to share their skinny little arse with 25 million others.. do it between those times and there's you, me and some cunt down the road online, no-one else.. the speed difference is massive...

You can set the PC to come on and run these, then shut down, either to a schedule, or when they've finished downloading,

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​Fucking modem arrived today. I open the bastard thing in anticipation, only to see start on 8th June on the inner packaging. On the upside, I live about half a mile from Chelmsford race course. Madness are playing live tonight. It is so loud. I am in my garden dancing along. The crowd went absolutely ape shit when they played night boat to Cairo. The neighbours think I am a fucking lunatic.


The neighbours think I am a fucking lunatic.

We think you're a fucking lunatic as well PK! Tee hee!

Edited by camberwell gypsy
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Guest Snatch

​Fuck me, no new cunts for weeks, then a dozen come along all at once. (I use the word "new" in its loosest sense.)

​I've noticed this as well Bawsy.

I'm detecting a Multi somewhere here.

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Guest Snatch

​I'm glad you can. The software on this site couldn't detect anything. It has funny turns out of the blue and is about as intuitive as the Metropolitan Police.

​Maybe time to change the software again Adders.

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