Cunts that turn up in the office for a meeting and expect to be seen

[Eddie]

2 minutes ago, Quincy Cockfingers said:

You should get married. Fruity cunts.

Have you seen the decrepit old fart, he resembles Wilfred Bramber from steptoe and son, only a little more sleazy.

[Guest Wizardsleeve]

22 hours ago, Bubba C said:

But as the saying goes, a car owned is much sweeter than a car leased. 

I think it's cute that Eddie bothers with you, fats. I wouldn't have given my part-time receptionist the time of day in my former life. Look after him, he's a good boss. 

Sweeter yet is the car gifted and never needing payments.  Don't think it doesn't take skill to get your bird to buy a car as birthday pressie!  Nothing too extravagan t, mind, it's a nice Jaguar XJ

[Bubba C]

43 minutes ago, Mrs Roops said:

Its worth considering, The VW Touareg, Audi Q7 and Porsche Cayenne are all the same car, albeit in different stages of tune.

A word of warning though. Whenever a visiting corporate buyer or salesman drove a Chelsea tractor into a previous employer's car park, we'd have the male receptionist give us a gaydar reading and if sufficiently hetero, appoint a smart female to be lead negotiator, who would flatter and compliment and then thoroughly rinse the visitor into providing a deal he hadn't originally intended.

Bubs, assuming this is not fantasy bollox, will your intended purchase actually go off-road or will the vehicle only leave the tarmac to venture on a gravelled drive?  Far better to go for an understated prestige saloon with 4 wheel drive IMO.

I won't be off-roading anywhere, Roops. 

Will see how the X5 goes, but if a little OTT for my needs, any knowledge of the X4?

[Frank]

16 minutes ago, Wizardsleeve said:

Sweeter yet is the car gifted and never needing payments.  Don't think it doesn't take skill to get your bird to buy a car as birthday pressie!  Nothing too extravagan t, mind, it's a nice Jaguar XJ

Your dad's old jag? Musty.. but nice. God rest his soul. 

[Eddie]

1 minute ago, Frank said:

Your dad's old jag? Musty.. but nice. 

You're right Frank, jags are for old men...

[Guest Wizardsleeve]

4 minutes ago, Frank said:

Your dad's old jag? Musty.. but nice. God rest his soul. 

I see your reading comprehension skills haven't improved Francis.  Read the post again.  Then go make a video hanging yourself. 

[Frank]

8 minutes ago, Wizardsleeve said:

I see your reading comprehension skills haven't improved Francis.  Read the post again.  Then go make a video hanging yourself. 

No offence, wiz. I was simply putting two and two together... a gifted rancid old jag, and a recently deceased loving father with a compulsive lying faggot yank of a son. 

Good morning. 

[Mrs Roops]

44 minutes ago, Bubba C said:

I won't be off-roading anywhere, Roops. 

Will see how the X5 goes, but if a little OTT for my needs, any knowledge of the X4?

I've always thought that BMWs whilst well engineered, scream "look at me" so you get little cooperation from other road users and are first choice for the key scratchers. I prefer the understated look but that's just a personal opinion.

Just as well you won't be going off-road as The previous X5 was appalling off the tarmac and lethal on the snow. I'm told BMW have now addressed those concerns but......

Until GM royally screwed the brand up, I always drove Saabs - left field, understated yet prestige nonetheless. Now I stick to Audi's, any colour as long as its black.

Some drivers do like the elevated drive position, so if you want to save money, want good MPG, impressive torque, half-decent residuals, lots of gadgets and have 4 wheels on tap when needed, try the Mazda CX-5.

[Guest Wizardsleeve]

10 minutes ago, Frank said:

No offence, wiz. I was simply putting two and two together... a gifted rancid old jag, and a recently deceased loving father with a compulsive lying faggot yank of a son. 

Good morning. 

So, you think that's putting two and two together?  You've done better, Frank.  You're a hollowed out, dried up turd of your old self.  I won't even point out the hypocrisy to the "compulsive lying faggot" aspect of your past contributions.  

I do hope your quest to fit a motor to Ming's old rickshaw meets with some success.  You've put so much work into it 

[Frank]

14 minutes ago, Wizardsleeve said:

So, you think that's putting two and two together?  You've done better, Frank.  You're a hollowed out, dried up turd of your old self.  I won't even point out the hypocrisy to the "compulsive lying faggot" aspect of your past contributions.  

I do hope your quest to fit a motor to Ming's old rickshaw meets with some success.  You've put so much work into it 

I'm sorry, I've gone a little overboard here, wiz. No disrepect towards you or any of your family members, but you did clearly state on here several months ago that your father owned a Jaguar XJ. 

Is he still in the boot (trunk)?

[scotty]

45 minutes ago, Mrs Roops said:

I've always thought that BMWs whilst well engineered, scream "look at me" so you get little cooperation from other road users and are first choice for the key scratchers. I prefer the understated look but that's just a personal opinion.

Just as well you won't be going off-road as The previous X5 was appalling off the tarmac and lethal on the snow. I'm told BMW have now addressed those concerns but......

Until GM royally screwed the brand up, I always drove Saabs - left field, understated yet prestige nonetheless. Now I stick to Audi's, any colour as long as its black.

Some drivers do like the elevated drive position, so if you want to save money, want good MPG, impressive torque, half-decent residuals, lots of gadgets and have 4 wheels on tap when needed, try the Mazda CX-5.

What is this utter fucking bollocks?  A car's a car, it's bad enough hearing blokes banging on about them but it's even worse when the birds start chipping in. All you need is a parking sensor roops, and a gap in the menstrual cycle. 

[Guest Quincy Cockfingers]

1 hour ago, Eddie said:

Have you seen the decrepit old fart, he resembles Wilfred Bramber from steptoe and son, only a little more sleazy.

He once admitted to me he was a cripple, one of these moaning forces spastics who do nothing but whinge about having their legs and arms blown off. 

[Guest Quincy Cockfingers]

41 minutes ago, Frank said:

I'm sorry, I've gone a little overboard here, wiz. No disrepect towards you or any of your family members, but you did clearly state on here several months ago that your father owned a Jaguar XJ. 

Is he still in the boot (trunk)?

No disrespect to him or any of his family members ? Have you lost the plot? I gathered they were dropping like flies and none remained extant but he. Anyway, how did they die, im curious? Was it an awful car smash , fire, suicide ? Did they just trip like fools and smash their heads in? Tell me more, it's ok.

[Cuntybaws]

3 hours ago, Eddie said:

You're right Frank, jags are for old men...

The current XJR.5.0 V8 is a fucking masterpiece. Every possible luxury for us old duffers, and 0-60 in under 5 seconds.

The only downside is that it's hard to decide which colour looks best, so I got two of the cunts. But then again, I make so much fucking money each and every month that I don't need a bonus.

* Some of the above facts are true. Some may not be.

[Guest Quincy Cockfingers]

7 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said:

The current XJR.5.0 V8 is a fucking masterpiece. Every possible luxury for us old duffers, and 0-60 in under 5 seconds.

The only downside is that it's hard to decide which colour looks best, so I got two of the cunts. But then again, I make so much fucking money each and every month that I don't need a bonus.

* Some of the above facts are true. Some may not be.

My car can drive under water and soar through the air with equal ease, it has 40 wheels, and can also travel through time, though only forward and at the same rate as the universe, and also is space capable, as long as the space is directly above the road. At the push of a dashboard button, a robot emerges to suck me off, or any passenger who I direct it to, and it never complains or wise - cracks. So you can stick your jaguar up your arse, I hope you get mauled by one.

[Mrs Roops]

2 hours ago, scotty said:

What is this utter fucking bollocks?  A car's a car, it's bad enough hearing blokes banging on about them but it's even worse when the birds start chipping in. All you need is a parking sensor roops, and a gap in the menstrual cycle. 

Hmm, the Corner is a large tent, all noms, comments and bitching be it the serious, the sublime, surreal or silly are equally welcome. Some are interested in football (personally I don't understand the fuss) some like to copy jokes and long may that continue as the Sicki thread is the site's most popular. Me, I have a thing about powerful and fast machines - the more buttons, switches and dials the better IMO. Strangely, aside from kicking Nazi butt in Wolfenstein 3D and the ghouls of Doom and Quake I loved Gunship 2000 and MS FlightSim 4. I was very popular with the lads, not for reasons you may think but I often had requests to configure boot disks to run games on 386 machines, but I digress.

As for your last para, I cant help noticing that adverts extolling the virtues of park assist show pussy-whipped men taking the advantage of the tech. Menstrual cycle? Just go with the flow is my advice. I'd be more impressed if you had a pair of red wings embroidered on your jacket.....

[Cuntybaws]

27 minutes ago, Quincy Cockfingers said:

My car can drive under water and soar through the air with equal ease, it has 40 wheels, and can also travel through time, though only forward and at the same rate as the universe, and also is space capable, as long as the space is directly above the road. At the push of a dashboard button, a robot emerges to suck me off, or any passenger who I direct it to, and it never complains or wise - cracks. So you can stick your jaguar up your arse, I hope you get mauled by one.

Ah, the Mitty 2000. Beautiful plumage.

[Guest Quincy Cockfingers]

8 hours ago, Frank said:

Your dad's old jag? Musty.. but nice. God rest his soul. 

I'd sooner have a ride in his dad's old cougar, if she wasn't brown fucking bread. God rest her holes.

[Frank]

16 minutes ago, Quincy Cockfingers said:

I'd sooner have a ride in his dad's old cougar, if she wasn't brown fucking bread. God rest her holes.

shut up.

[Guest Quincy Cockfingers]

31 minutes ago, Frank said:

shut up.

You shut up. Lanky fucking shite stripe.

[scotty]

5 hours ago, Mrs Roops said:

Hmm, the Corner is a large tent, all noms, comments and bitching be it the serious, the sublime, surreal or silly are equally welcome. Some are interested in football (personally I don't understand the fuss) some like to copy jokes and long may that continue as the Sicki thread is the site's most popular. Me, I have a thing about powerful and fast machines - the more buttons, switches and dials the better IMO. Strangely, aside from kicking Nazi butt in Wolfenstein 3D and the ghouls of Doom and Quake I loved Gunship 2000 and MS FlightSim 4. I was very popular with the lads, not for reasons you may think but I often had requests to configure boot disks to run games on 386 machines, but I digress.

As for your last para, I cant help noticing that adverts extolling the virtues of park assist show pussy-whipped men taking the advantage of the tech. Menstrual cycle? Just go with the flow is my advice. I'd be more impressed if you had a pair of red wings embroidered on your jacket.....

Wimmin. No sense of humour. 

[Frank]

25 minutes ago, Quincy Cockfingers said:

You shut up. Lanky fucking shite stripe.

Wiz is driving around in his dad's jag with the old cunt's corpse in the boot. Do something quince.

[Guest Quincy Cockfingers]

1 hour ago, Frank said:

Wiz is driving around in his dad's jag with the old cunt's corpse in the boot. Do something quince.

Slow down Franko. Don't jump to conclusions. Possibly he is doing the decent thing and is en route to a coastal cliff, to cast the cold farting carcasse onto the rocky surf below, the better to sustain crab-kind.

The essence of life may have flown, but life still abides in the husk: sturdy whelks abide in once smiling eyes, conger eels lurk in a once welcoming ring piece, dainty shrimp chitter amid dead grey pubes, and lively little semen squirm still in the distended gut.

When his last corporeal molecule is shat out by some spiny eyeless horror into the eternal gloomy muck of the sea bed, only then will Wiz know an end to grief, and may stop to ponder his own fate, instead of crying like a baby about dead fucking daddy.

[Ape™️]

30 minutes ago, Frank said:

Wiz is driving around in his dad's jag with the old cunt's corpse in the boot. Do something quince.

Has anyone told the stiffy joke?

[Guest Quincy Cockfingers]

59 minutes ago, scotty said:

Wimmin. No sense of humour. 

Nuns. No sense of humour.