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We definitely need to up our game.

Slagging off Punkers etc, whilst fun momentarily, means shitehawks like this titty-bearded, modern day snake-oil salesman breach the perimiter of our 'ville without us calling in the airstrike.

'The Worlds Greatest DJ' apparently.

A proud boast - right up there with world's greatest herpes scar.

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Guest Trumpton  Bacon
43 minutes ago, Jiggerycock said:

We definitely need to up our game.

Slagging off Punkers etc, whilst fun momentarily, means shitehawks like this titty-bearded, modern day snake-oil salesman breach the perimiter of our 'ville without us calling in the airstrike.

'The Worlds Greatest DJ' apparently.

A proud boast - right up there with world's greatest herpes scar.

I had to google this cunt to find out who he is, I still don't know.

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Isn't that the cunt that died after bring married to Lisa Minelli and being on Celebrity Ceebeebies?

He can only be the worlds greatest DJ if he can name my 1000 fave records. In the right order. He can't, so he isn't, ergo he is a cunt of the spacker genus.

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I quite liked that song "Titanium, by David Guetta - featuring Sia", on which David Guetta appeared to do exactly fuck all.

Did you know that his full name is Pierre David Guetta, and that he's French? In case that's not enough, here's a picture of the mincing great floppy-haired poof so that even the completely illiterate can hate him too.

david-guetta.jpeg

 

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Guest Ollyboro
1 hour ago, Manky said:

Isn't that the cunt that died after bring married to Lisa Minelli and being on Celebrity Ceebeebies?

He can only be the worlds greatest DJ if he can name my 1000 fave records. In the right order. He can't, so he isn't, ergo he is a cunt of the spacker genus.

Even allowing for the assorted dance, Christmas, end of decade etc spin-offs, I don't think there has been a 1000 releases under the 'Now That's What I Call Music' moniker, Manks. Have you bought the same titles in different formats?

Edited by Ollyboro
Quivering erection
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1 hour ago, Ollyboro said:

Even allowing for the assorted dance, Christmas, end of decade etc spin-offs, I don't think there has been a 1000 releases under the 'Now That's What I Call Music' moniker, Manks. Have you bought the same titles in different formats?

Nearly right. I like 'Vindaloo' by Fat Les. All the rest is just noise.

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Guest Drew P Pissflaps
1 hour ago, Cuntybaws said:

I quite liked that song "Titanium, by David Guetta - featuring Sia", on which David Guetta appeared to do exactly fuck all.

Did you know that his full name is Pierre David Guetta, and that he's French? In case that's not enough, here's a picture of the mincing great floppy-haired poof so that even the completely illiterate can hate him too.

david-guetta.jpeg

 

Sacre Bleau. Looks like a bearded lady you'd see at the circus.

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3 hours ago, Drew P Pissflaps said:

Sacre Bleau. Looks like a bearded lady you'd see at the circus.

@Ape it's Drewsday yet again, do you fancy a wager?

I estimate that by 7pm he will be babbling inanely about R.C. models, by 8pm he will have entered Terry Wogan Children in Need mode, and his last post will be shortly before 20:46 just prior to dropping his massive-buttoned geriatric-friendly phone into his piss-filled commode. 

Any alternative predictions?

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2 hours ago, Decimus said:

@Ape it's Drewsday yet again, do you fancy a wager?

I estimate that by 7pm he will be babbling inanely about R.C. models, by 8pm he will have entered Terry Wogan Children in Need mode, and his last post will be shortly before 20:46 just prior to dropping his massive-buttoned geriatric-friendly phone into his piss-filled commode. 

Any alternative predictions?

Sounds highly feasible.

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Guest Drew P Pissflaps

I shall be watching Great English Bake Off to pick up some tips on how to bake my own personal chocolate yule log and then have it Yodelled to your address. Are you in Yarmouth, Gorleston or Cobham? 

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23 minutes ago, Drew P Pissflaps said:

I shall be watching Great English Bake Off to pick up some tips on how to bake my own personal chocolate yule log and then have it Yodelled to your address. Are you in Yarmouth, Gorleston or Cobham? 

You sound overly familiar with the topography of the district, so much so that I'd be willing to bet that you're bungalow is situated on Rat Island.

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Guest Drew P Pissflaps
2 minutes ago, Decimus said:

You sound overly familiar with the topography of the district, so much so that I'd be willing to bet that you're bungalow is situated on Rat Island.

You're not one of those faux posh cunts who live in Bradwell are you?

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23 hours ago, Manky said:

Isn't that the cunt that died after bring married to Lisa Minelli and being on Celebrity Ceebeebies?

He can only be the worlds greatest DJ if he can name my 1000 fave records. In the right order. He can't, so he isn't, ergo he is a cunt of the spacker genus.

Let me have a guess Manks: 

1. The laughing gnome, 2. Shuddupa your face, 3. Wombling Merry Christmas, 4. Smurf song (with that Jewish bloke Father Abraham) 5. Bob the builder 6. Don't pull the chain dad, I like to see it float (Bernard Cribbins)......how am I doing?

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22 hours ago, Cuntybaws said:

I quite liked that song "Titanium, by David Guetta - featuring Sia", on which David Guetta appeared to do exactly fuck all.

Did you know that his full name is Pierre David Guetta, and that he's French? In case that's not enough, here's a picture of the mincing great floppy-haired poof so that even the completely illiterate can hate him too.

david-guetta.jpeg

 

Deffo a cunt 

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1 minute ago, camberwell gypsy said:

Let me have a guess Manks: 

1. The laughing gnome, 2. Shuddupa your face, 3. Wombling Merry Christmas, 4. Smurf song (with that Jewish bloke Father Abraham) 5. Bob the builder 6. Don't pull the chain dad, I like to see it float (Bernard Cribbins)......how am I doing?

Not bad. Out of the first 6 you got them all wrong. Numbers 1 to 99 are all either Blondie, Alice Cooper or the Stranglers. Number 100 is 99 Red Balloons which I put in for the sake of European unity.

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18 minutes ago, Manky said:

Not bad. Out of the first 6 you got them all wrong. Numbers 1 to 99 are all either Blondie, Alice Cooper or the Stranglers. Number 100 is 99 Red Balloons which I put in for the sake of European unity.

Most of mine would be Stranglers, Talk Talk, pub rock and very early B52s. 

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Guest Arthur Fuqs-Aches

Many DJs are cunts. Yes Guetta-Lost is a fraud as he cannot do it on vinyl. All the fake digital DJs can fuck off with their shite tunes.

How about Dave Pearce? He's fucking awful.

145250955_9bfc648059_o.jpg

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Guest Arthur Fuqs-Aches
On 9/5/2017 at 11:30 AM, Snatch said:

Another wanker that makes a living sampling other peoples music.

An automatic programmed cunthawk who's a puppet on a mac book in front of thousands of unfortunates. How the fuck can that be DJing? Press play and stand back you cunt.

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On 9/6/2017 at 11:49 AM, camberwell gypsy said:

Most of mine would be Stranglers, Talk Talk, pub rock and very early B52s. 

I expect Manky sits in a dark corner with his poundland earphones, wanking his little spuds flat whilst listening to Jive Bunny records, wailing like a trapped cat, not knowing whether to use the only clean bit left of his hanky to mop his teary eyes, or his furry little bellend.

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  • 1 month later...
Guest Drew P Pissflaps
On Tuesday, September 05, 2017 at 8:18 PM, Decimus said:

You sound overly familiar with the topography of the district, so much so that I'd be willing to bet that you're bungalow is situated on Rat Island.

Even the Cowell cunt is in the market for a bungalow now. What do you think of that then you TD cock sucker? 

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