Jiggerycock Posted November 13, 2017 Report Share Posted November 13, 2017 Botoxed to the maxed, nipped and tucked like a frangipane slice this....this....this leather suitcase refuses to either die or stop strutting and fretting after her 130 years on the stage. Any of those '100 Greatest.....' snide talking-head countdown shows? Up she pops like a priapic cock, mid-Atlantic twang a go-go, dropping all manner of contemporary cultural reference points (here a Jay Zee, there a Stormzy, everywhere a Rhianna) in a lame attempt to prove how hip (rather than hip replacement), she still is. Look love, you're not the 'Scally from The Gorballs Alley' you pretend to be. You're a deeply sad individual who is sublimating the fact you're about as relevant as the clinker round my hoop. Now behave yourself! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted November 13, 2017 Report Share Posted November 13, 2017 1 hour ago, Jiggerycock said: Botoxed to the maxed, nipped and tucked like a frangipane slice this....this....this leather suitcase refuses to either die or stop strutting and fretting after her 130 years on the stage. Any of those '100 Greatest.....' snide talking-head countdown shows? Up she pops like a priapic cock, mid-Atlantic twang a go-go, dropping all manner of contemporary cultural reference points (here a Jay Zee, there a Stormzy, everywhere a Rhianna) in a lame attempt to prove how hip (rather than hip replacement), she still is. Look love, you're not the 'Scally from The Gorballs Alley' you pretend to be. You're a deeply sad individual who is sublimating the fact you're about as relevant as the clinker round my hoop. Now behave yourself! I've never seen the point in this woman. Apart from her "Weeeeeeeeeeeeeellllll" shouting song and being the face of Kay's catalogue in early 20th Century, I can't think of anything she's any good at. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Posted November 13, 2017 Report Share Posted November 13, 2017 The female equivalent of Tom cunting Jones,sad fucking has-beens that think they can still cut it with the 'Yoof' of today.Fuck off and die Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Posted November 13, 2017 Report Share Posted November 13, 2017 Having said that,she'd get a length if she asked nicely,bag on head first though 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Lady Penelope Posted November 13, 2017 Report Share Posted November 13, 2017 2 hours ago, Jiggerycock said: Botoxed to the maxed, nipped and tucked like a frangipane slice this....this....this leather suitcase refuses to either die or stop strutting and fretting after her 130 years on the stage. Any of those '100 Greatest.....' snide talking-head countdown shows? Up she pops like a priapic cock, mid-Atlantic twang a go-go, dropping all manner of contemporary cultural reference points (here a Jay Zee, there a Stormzy, everywhere a Rhianna) in a lame attempt to prove how hip (rather than hip replacement), she still is. Look love, you're not the 'Scally from The Gorballs Alley' you pretend to be. You're a deeply sad individual who is sublimating the fact you're about as relevant as the clinker round my hoop. Now behave yourself! Come closer, come closer and listen. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Lady Penelope Posted November 13, 2017 Report Share Posted November 13, 2017 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nocti Posted November 13, 2017 Report Share Posted November 13, 2017 59 minutes ago, Neil said: Having said that,she'd get a length if she asked nicely,bag on head first though I was about to give you a fucking roasting about your first post, until I saw your second. Good work Neil. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Drew P Pissflaps Posted November 13, 2017 Report Share Posted November 13, 2017 1 hour ago, Neil said: Having said that,she'd get a length if she asked nicely,bag on head first though She's a ginger isn't she? You're welcome to it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
colonelkurtz Posted November 13, 2017 Report Share Posted November 13, 2017 She was married to a Bee Gee ... the one with the big gnashers and shit haircut and shit voice .. or was it The Wurzels Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted November 13, 2017 Report Share Posted November 13, 2017 3 hours ago, Neil said: Having said that,she'd get a length if she asked nicely,bag on head first though You're an officer and a gentleman, Neil Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Alfie Noakes Posted November 13, 2017 Report Share Posted November 13, 2017 3 hours ago, Neil said: Having said that,she'd get a length if she asked nicely,bag on head first though A true romantic if ever I saw one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Posted November 13, 2017 Report Share Posted November 13, 2017 17 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: You're an officer and a gentleman, Neil That I am,can't let the lady get spunk in her hair,she may have just washed it, I'm not a fucking animal you know Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Lady Penelope Posted November 13, 2017 Report Share Posted November 13, 2017 17 minutes ago, Alfie Noakes said: A true romantic if ever I saw one. You make me want to shout. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nocti Posted November 13, 2017 Report Share Posted November 13, 2017 I don't know whether to put it down to a kind of sexual perversion or frustration on my part, so to speak; or the fact that she has managed to botch herself excessively into not looking so much like the clueless old talentless shortbread slag that she is, but I reckon I would actually fuck it if I kept my eyes closed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rick_B Posted November 13, 2017 Report Share Posted November 13, 2017 55 minutes ago, colonelkurtz said: She was married to a Bee Gee ... the one with the big gnashers and shit haircut and shit voice .. or was it The Wurzels I thought they all had big gnashers and shit haircut and shit voice. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubby Pecker Posted November 13, 2017 Report Share Posted November 13, 2017 3 hours ago, Neil said: Having said that,she'd get a length if she asked nicely,bag on head first though You're a real gent Neil. Sticking a bag over your head might make it more pleasurable for poor lulu as you mount her with your considerable bulk. Not having to look at your slobbering jowls and crossed eyes as you approach spaffing your load might save her from an immediate suicide bid when the ordeal was over. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted November 13, 2017 Report Share Posted November 13, 2017 16 minutes ago, Rick_B said: I thought they all had big gnashers and shit haircut and shit voice. That was the Osmonds Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Posted November 13, 2017 Report Share Posted November 13, 2017 12 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: That was the Osmonds Crazy Horseteeth 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted November 13, 2017 Report Share Posted November 13, 2017 1 hour ago, Neil said: Crazy Horseteeth I'll set them up, you knock 'em down Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ratcum Posted November 13, 2017 Report Share Posted November 13, 2017 She's a terrorist hiding in plain sight. "Lulu's Time Bomb" is advertised on those shopping channels bold as brass. She makes want to shout. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
colonelkurtz Posted November 14, 2017 Report Share Posted November 14, 2017 13 hours ago, Rick_B said: I thought they all had big gnashers and shit haircut and shit voice. I never could tell the difference between Larry , Gary , Harry or Sally Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cuntspotter Posted November 14, 2017 Report Share Posted November 14, 2017 My mate plays guitar for her. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Drew P Pissflaps Posted November 14, 2017 Report Share Posted November 14, 2017 Tinky Winky and Po are bigger cunts in my opinion. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jiggerycock Posted November 14, 2017 Author Report Share Posted November 14, 2017 1 hour ago, cuntspotter said: My mate plays guitar for her. Well I've never heard it called THAT before Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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