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Whispering Dave


colonelkurtz

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David Attenborough ,  Cunt ?  Surely not . The publics most well loved national treasure and all round luvverly bloke who has been toppermost of everyones poppermost human being chart since black and white telly days should give us all a break from his simpering waffle about everything from spider crabs wanking habits  to the texture and stench of buffalo shit and all things in between. He's all a bit too earnest and he never slips in any knob jokes or wise cracks about those ugly as fuck deep sea fishes looking just like Katie Price. Just once I'd have loved to see a great white shark chomp on his leg or a starving hungry bastard buzzard tear half of his smug face off then swoop away squawking  " oi oi cunt , so how do you like it then , serve you right for filming in my house without permission ! " . So give it a rest pal, after all you're just a glorified geography teacher who has been winging it for years with groupies composed entirely of National Trust Lifetime Memberhip Honda Jazz driving tossers. Although the state funeral ,  week of mourning and renaming  the M25 in his honour should at least mean a day off work. Mind you with his likely successors  being that Chris Packham dick and that skeletal bint that tags along with him maybe Dave isn't so bad after all.

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5 minutes ago, colonelkurtz said:

David Attenborough ,  Cunt ?  Surely not . The publics most well loved national treasure and all round luvverly bloke who has been toppermost of everyones poppermost human being chart since black and white telly days should give us all a break from his simpering waffle about everything from spider crabs wanking habits  to the texture and stench of buffalo shit and all things in between. He's all a bit too earnest and he never slips in any knob jokes or wise cracks about those ugly as fuck deep sea fishes looking just like Katie Price. Just once I'd have loved to see a great white shark chomp on his leg or a starving hungry bastard buzzard tear half of his smug face off then swoop away squawking  " oi oi cunt , so how do you like it then , serve you right for filming in my house without permission ! " . So give it a rest pal, after all you're just a glorified geography teacher who has been winging it for years with groupies composed entirely of National Trust Lifetime Memberhip Honda Jazz driving tossers. Although the state funeral ,  week of mourning and renaming  the M25 in his honour should at least mean a day off work. Mind you with his likely successors  being that Chris Packham dick and that skeletal bint that tags along with him maybe Dave isn't so bad after all.

None of the above named cunts, or Michaela Strachan, or Bill Oddie, were as good as Johnny Morris. Not even that weird Nutkin cunt with the Emo Philips haircut.

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Attenborough's a cunt, and a fuckin' hypocritical, first class, one at that.

The cunt's been flying around the world, at our expense, for fifty or sixty years then, when he realises he's getting close to meeting his maker, he goes all Greta Thunberg and starts telling us we should save the fuckin' planet by reducing our 'carbon footprint'.

Fuck him, and the 737 he flew in on.

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Attenborough was at his best when showing us the wonders of the natural world when the world was a very big place. However, in this day and age when you can get to virtually any point on the planet within 48 hours, and the internet where every natural phenomenon has been documented and filmed a dozen times, his recent offerings have become irrelevant and samey.

If he’d have made a serious stand regarding the destruction of nature 30 fucking years ago then perhaps we wouldn’t be in the shitty state we are right now. Humans are a plague on the planet, intent on destroying the last patch of wild to the detriment of every living thing, including us. Influential people need to stand up and start saying it as it is.

 

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6 minutes ago, Stubby Pecker said:

Attenborough was at his best when showing us the wonders of the natural world when the world was a very big place. However, in this day and age when you can get to virtually any point on the planet within 48 hours, and the internet where every natural phenomenon has been documented and filmed a dozen times, his recent offerings have become irrelevant and samey.

If he’d have made a serious stand regarding the destruction of nature 30 fucking years ago then perhaps we wouldn’t be in the shitty state we are right now. Humans are a plague on the planet, intent on destroying the last patch of wild to the detriment of every living thing, including us. Influential people need to stand up and start saying it as it is.

 

The floppy haired old poof’s been murdering pandas with jet fuel for decades. I personally lost any respect for him when he shit himself and bottled it from that necky gorilla. Start taking any shit from these banana munching wankers and next thing they’ll be riding horses and carrying rifles.

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39 minutes ago, Stubby Pecker said:

Attenborough was at his best when showing us the wonders of the natural world when the world was a very big place. However, in this day and age when you can get to virtually any point on the planet within 48 hours, and the internet where every natural phenomenon has been documented and filmed a dozen times, his recent offerings have become irrelevant and samey.

If he’d have made a serious stand regarding the destruction of nature 30 fucking years ago then perhaps we wouldn’t be in the shitty state we are right now. Humans are a plague on the planet, intent on destroying the last patch of wild to the detriment of every living thing, including us. Influential people need to stand up and start saying it as it is.

 

Make it at least eighty.

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Guest Sue R Pipe
21 hours ago, colonelkurtz said:

David Attenborough ,  Cunt ?  Surely not . The publics most well loved national treasure and all round luvverly bloke who has been toppermost of everyones poppermost human being chart since black and white telly days should give us all a break from his simpering waffle about everything from spider crabs wanking habits  to the texture and stench of buffalo shit and all things in between. He's all a bit too earnest and he never slips in any knob jokes or wise cracks about those ugly as fuck deep sea fishes looking just like Katie Price. Just once I'd have loved to see a great white shark chomp on his leg or a starving hungry bastard buzzard tear half of his smug face off then swoop away squawking  " oi oi cunt , so how do you like it then , serve you right for filming in my house without permission ! " . So give it a rest pal, after all you're just a glorified geography teacher who has been winging it for years with groupies composed entirely of National Trust Lifetime Memberhip Honda Jazz driving tossers. Although the state funeral ,  week of mourning and renaming  the M25 in his honour should at least mean a day off work. Mind you with his likely successors  being that Chris Packham dick and that skeletal bint that tags along with him maybe Dave isn't so bad after all.

It's a shame this 'national treasure' decided to cash in his credibility chips and go all in with that whining little Swedish brat. Fuck you Dave, why not tell the Africans to stop fucking and producing more and more little retards. Or maybe the Chinese and Indians for pumping out relentless shite into the atmosphere.

You won't though, you dementia riddled geriatric wanker. Throw yourself off Boaty McFuckface you mongo cunt.

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23 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said:

The floppy haired old poof’s been murdering pandas with jet fuel for decades. I personally lost any respect for him when he shit himself and bottled it from that necky gorilla. Start taking any shit from these banana munching wankers and next thing they’ll be riding horses and carrying rifles.

What got him in the end? My guess is either Covid or Climate Change. I’m sure the BBC and Sky News etc. will let us know soon enough and tell us what else we all need to give up from now on to save the planet from imminent destruction. I’ll be very surprised if it’s not all Putin and Donald Trumps fault and the only way to stop it happening again is to send more arms to Ukraine, turn off our heating, make sure to get fully Covid boosted, wear a mask, get rid of our cars immediately and cycle to the food bank once a week (but only if Chris Whitty says it’s safe to do so incase we kill Granny).

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18 minutes ago, King Billy said:

What got him in the end? My guess is either Covid or Climate Change. I’m sure the BBC and Sky News etc. will let us know soon enough and tell us what else we all need to give up from now on to save the planet from imminent destruction. I’ll be very surprised if it’s not all Putin and Donald Trumps fault and the only way to stop it happening again is to send more arms to Ukraine, turn off our heating, make sure to get fully Covid boosted, wear a mask, get rid of our cars immediately and cycle to the food bank once a week (but only if Chris Whitty says it’s safe to do so incase we kill Granny).

Is he dead? I am so disconnected from the MSM now that virtually all of my current affairs knowledge comes from this place. 

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16 hours ago, camberwell gypsy said:

No. Mr Miaggi was that little cunt who used to leap out of cupboards and fridges to attack Inspector Cluaes.....Inspector Claus.......Peter Sellers! 

The little slope cunt was named Cato. 😆

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4 hours ago, Penny Farthing said:

Nutkins was renowned for his natural ebullience and unruly hair style.

In essence, he was a creature of the forest, who became an overnight billionaire when Johnny Morris left him his entire estate. 

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