You better start praying fellas

[Decimus]

7 minutes ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said:

Morning Cuntybaws, out of interest do Scotland have a female football team?

Yeah, they're called Rangers.

[Cuntybaws]

41 minutes ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said:

Morning Cuntybaws, out of interest do Scotland have a female football team? 

I presume so, given we practically invented it.

Traditions must be maintained, though, so I imagine they're complete and utter shite, like every other Scottish team since the very dawn of time.

[Old Chap Raasclaat]

18 minutes ago, Neil said:

Yes, we're cunts. I'm off back to Italy next week and I really don't want to come back if the cunts win. Even more reason is the fucking shit fucking weather we get in this grey,invaded shit hole. I'd rather be a miserable old cunt sweltering in 40 degree heat than being as miserable as the cold,grey,wet shitpit we call home. Ciao.adios and buon notte

I mostly agree Neil. I decided to holiday in the UK recently, wanting to avoid airports, the hordes of trash and all the hanging around and stress that going abroad entails. Whilst I had a nice time in the south west, it was a fucking rip off, almost twenty phackin paaaand for four ice creams on the beach, and I ain't talking Haagen-Raas either. To top it all off the weather was nice but pissed down one of the days. Anyways, on a nice summers day, ideally near a nice beach or in the countryside it's hard to beat being in England.

Being part Italian myself, I'm curious to know if you have connections there Neil? Would you consider taking a package there for me? It'll pay for your holiday Neil... PM me. Lastly, do you think the Italians are happy with you 'invading' their country, no doubt demanding egg and chips for lunch and dinner? Lol.

[Old Chap Raasclaat]

5 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said:

I presume so, given we practically invented it.

Traditions must be maintained, though, so I imagine they're complete and utter shite, like every other Scottish team since the very dawn of time.

I don't get why Scotland are so shit at Football as a team, they've produced some top quality individuals over the years (King Kenny, Souness etc) but are always shit as a team. It's a strange one Cuntybaws, and I was wondering what you thought about it?

[Cuntybaws]

11 minutes ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said:

I don't get why Scotland are so shit at Football as a team, they've produced some top quality individuals over the years (King Kenny, Souness etc) but are always shit as a team. It's a strange one Cuntybaws, and I was wondering what you thought about it?

I can't say I've given it a great deal of conscious thought. "Fire hot, tree pretty, Scotland useless" has always seemed self-evident. Scotland is a small nation that has never punched its meagre weight on the football field. (Perhaps just too busy inventing everything.) There's something in the Jock psyche that almost seems to enjoy losing - I'll leave you to google Mark Renton's "It's shite being Scottish" speech for yourself.

That said, we did beat those oily Spanish dagos recently, and then wiped the smirk off Haaland's spam fritter of a face as a follow up. It's the hope that kills you.

[Last Cunt Standing]

5 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said:

It's the hope that kills you.

If you’re Scottish, it’s still more likely to be Heroin or Cholesterol that kills you, to be fair. 

[Old Chap Raasclaat]

10 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said:

I can't say I've given it a great deal of conscious thought. "Fire hot, tree pretty, Scotland useless" has always seemed self-evident. Scotland is a small nation that has never punched its meagre weight on the football field. (Perhaps just too busy inventing everything.) There's something in the Jock psyche that almost seems to enjoy losing - I'll leave you to google Mark Renton's "It's shite being Scottish" speech for yourself.

That said, we did beat those oily Spanish dagos recently, and then wiped the smirk off Haaland's spam fritter of a face as a follow up. It's the hope that kills you.

Yes, the Scots have invented a lot, must be all that omega 3 epa/dha rich oily fish. One family member told me the Scottish are the richest people in the UK, another said the Scots are watertight... Would you say the two statements are true? What I do know is I like a whiskey and love shortbread, and I've reported you for the use of the word Jock. 

[Last Cunt Standing]

24 minutes ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said:

Yes, the Scots have invented a lot, must be all that omega 3 epa/dha rich oily fish. One family member told me the Scottish are the richest people in the UK, another said the Scots are watertight... Would you say the two statements are true? What I do know is I like a whiskey and love shortbread, and I've reported you for the use of the word Jock. 

Not the most diverse of populations up there, Raas. In fact after five minutes thought the only famous Black Scotsman I can think of is McLaren from Porridge. 

[Eric Cuntman]

1 hour ago, Cuntybaws said:

I presume so, given we practically invented it.

Traditions must be maintained, though, so I imagine they're complete and utter shite, like every other Scottish team since the very dawn of time.

That was a huge thing at the time. Dee Hepburn was on the cover of ‘Look-In’ and everything else between that and ‘Smash Hits’, and nobody really had a clue who Claire Grogan was until someone shouted ‘ALTERED IMAGES’ and pointed. Five minutes later she was completely forgotten and offered a receptionists job at the Crossroads Motel.

And fuck knows what happened to that gimpy little cunt counting elephants.

[Dyslexic cnut]

8 minutes ago, Last Cunt Standing said:

Not the most diverse of populations up there, Raas. In fact after five minutes thought the only famous Black Scotsman I can think of is McLaren from Porridge. 

Sir Arthur Coonan Doyle?

[Old Chap Raasclaat]

11 minutes ago, Last Cunt Standing said:

Not the most diverse of populations up there, Raas. In fact after five minutes thought the only famous Black Scotsman I can think of is McLaren from Porridge. 

It's a bit strange that the most famous Welsh are black (Shirley Bassey, Tom Jones)... Yet the Black man is uncommon up there, especially considering the amount of Mc and Macs in Jamaica. It's not surprising there are loads of Asian's up there and a heroin problem as they import a lot of it and launder the money. I remember a random Scottish lass chatting me up outside a restaurant in Edinburgh though, so they can't all be vile racists... I'm not going to there again LCS, I'm staying in England. 

[Neil]

Gracias Spagna per favore Signoritas

[Mike Hunt]

Thank fuck for that.  We'd have never heard the end of it.  One commentator used the words "cruel" and "devastated".  They lost fair and square to a better team, nothing cruel about it.  I was "devastated" that I overslept this morning, so Mrs H was "devastated" she didn't get breakfast in bed. 

[Cuntybaws]

I wonder if there'll be a bank holiday in Scotland?

[Eric Cuntman]

Is it over now?

[Last Cunt Standing]

6 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Is it over now?

If it’d gone on much longer Eric, the Ref would’ve put in for maternity leave. 

[Cuntybaws]

This is simply the greatest moment I’ve ever had since I started supporting the Spanish Women this morning.

[Decimus]

23 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said:

I wonder if there'll be a bank holiday in Scotland?

There's certainly a festival atmosphere in my house, even the women have breathed a collective sigh of relief. 

It's coming home, economy class, silver and hopefully with their gobs firmly fucking shut for another four years.

 

[Cuntybaws]

2 minutes ago, Decimus said:

It's coming home

[Eric Cuntman]

6 minutes ago, Decimus said:

There's certainly a festival atmosphere in my house, even the women have breathed a collective sigh of relief. 

It's coming home, economy class, silver and hopefully with their gobs firmly fucking shut for another four years.

 

Don’t be daft. They’re not going to miss the opportunity to aggressively point out that the women have achieved significantly more than their male counterparts, despite failing to win. 
 

Let’s put an end to this ‘Emperor’s New Clothes’ equality pantomime and let the England women’s team play the England men’s team and see what happens. If they want to be accepted as equal, either demonstrate that they are, or shut the fuck up.

[Mike Hunt]

1 hour ago, Dyslexic cnut said:

Sir Arthur Coonan Doyle?

The Wog Ness Monster.

[Decimus]

21 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Don’t be daft. They’re not going to miss the opportunity to aggressively point out that the women have achieved significantly more than their male counterparts, despite failing to win. 

This is the nub of it, E, they consider themselves the men's counterparts. That's why you've got all these comparisons and bullshit statements such as "They will be the first England team to win the world cup since 1966."

It must really jar them that the men don't feel the need to make any sort of direct comparison, due to the women playing a bastardised version of a game they can barely understand and barely play. Let's say for example that God forbid they would have won today, and then inexplicably the men's team stopped being bollocks and won the world cup in 2058. They aren't going to be saying it's "The first England team to win the world cup since 2023." Because they aren't the men's counterparts, they're a bunch of silly little girls pretending to be blokes.

They'll still clean up at the SPOTY ceremony, obviously.

[Decimus]

23 minutes ago, Mike Hunt said:

The Wog Ness Monster.

Nigfoot.

[Eric Cuntman]

34 minutes ago, Decimus said:

This is the nub of it, E, they consider themselves the men's counterparts. That's why you've got all these comparisons and bullshit statements such as "They will be the first England team to win the world cup since 1966."

It must really jar them that the men don't feel the need to make any sort of direct comparison, due to the women playing a bastardised version of a game they can barely understand and barely play. Let's say for example that God forbid they would have won today, and then inexplicably the men's team stopped being bollocks and won the world cup in 2058. They aren't going to be saying it's "The first England team to win the world cup since 2023." Because they aren't the men's counterparts, they're a bunch of silly little girls pretending to be blokes.

They'll still clean up at the SPOTY ceremony, obviously.

Did you see ‘Harry’s Heroes’? Redknapp put together a team of long retired England players, average age of the team was around 50. They even had Neil Ruddock in all his 20 stone glory, and a shot to fuck Paul Merson. 
 A training game was organised against a premiership women’s team, Crystal Palace I think. Anyway, the old cunts slaughtered them. In all honesty, Robbie Fowler and Matt LeTissier would have won on their own with David Seaman stood at the other end in case one of them lost possession.

[Decimus]

48 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Did you see ‘Harry’s Heroes’? Redknapp put together a team of long retired England players, average age of the team was around 50. They even had Neil Ruddock in all his 20 stone glory, and a shot to fuck Paul Merson. 
 A training game was organised against a premiership women’s team, Crystal Palace I think. Anyway, the old cunts slaughtered them. In all honesty, Robbie Fowler and Matt LeTissier would have won on their own with David Seaman stood at the other end in case one of them lost possession.

I did, the only thing that surprised me was that Ruddock didn't have a massive coronary event.

Paul Merson, what a player. I know Le Tissier gets a lot of praise because of his natural ability, but for me Merson had the potential to be one of the all times greats if it wasn't for some of his personal issues. In fact, both Le Tis and Merson playing in the modern game with all its excellent nutrition and aggressive training regimes would absolutely mop the fucking floor with most of the English cunts playing today IMHO.