Decimus Posted January 1 Report Share Posted January 1 Why don't they ever put these fucking things somewhere easy to access? I've lost count of the amount of times this Christmas I've been scrabbling around the back of the telly like some sort of queer cunt slipping on a heavily lubricated disco floor. With all the progress we've made with electronic technology over the last twenty years, you'd think some little Jap cunt would have had the genius idea to put these within easy reach instead of making them as difficult to find as a @Frank post that has made anyone laugh since 2016. Fuck off. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penny Farthing Posted January 1 Report Share Posted January 1 10 minutes ago, Decimus said: Why don't they ever put these fucking things somewhere easy to access? I've lost count of the amount of times this Christmas I've been scrabbling around the back of the telly like some sort of queer cunt slipping on a heavily lubricated disco floor. With all the progress we've made with electronic technology over the last twenty years, you'd think some little Jap cunt would have had the genius idea to put these within easy reach instead of making them as difficult to find as a @Frank post that has made anyone laugh since 2016. Fuck off. 🤣🙄🤣 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Chap Raasclaat Posted January 1 Report Share Posted January 1 HDMI ports really are located in shite positions. On one of my wall mounted TVs the wall mount attachment stops you connecting a HDMI cable, now what kind of cunt thought that was a good idea? The other TVs ports aren't easily accessible either so I leave them hanging out the cunt Tele, which makes me look a right cunt if I have visitors. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChildeHarold Posted January 1 Report Share Posted January 1 HMDI is a bit like floppy discs ten years ago love. Modern TVs are "smart" which means by definition all of these posts criticising smart tvs have been written by stupid users. They eschew physical connections - cables are so old school. Two HMDI buried in its bum, no scart obviously, not even a headphone jack, no digital audio out either. Had to get sound from a USB connection and a box I had to buy separately. The build quality was less than a Fisher Price toy. That sums up the pile of shit below. Downstairs I had a £1750 65" LG OLED curved screen 3D fucking billion colour engine blah blah lump of shit that lasted four years. I replaced it with a £60 47"Toshiba circa 2010. Works fantastic, loads of connections and two HMDI on the side easy to get to from a charity shop. Upstairs, a 32" Toshiba I've had for twenty years which works like a fucking dream. Loads of easy access connections. Great menu. Great remote control. No fucking pretension. Built to last. And it has! FUCK OFF SO CALLED SMART TVs AND ESPECIALLY TO YOU FUCKING SHIT COMPANY LG L= LIFE's G= GOOD FOR NOTHING Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Chap Raasclaat Posted January 1 Report Share Posted January 1 6 minutes ago, ChildeHarold said: Downstairs I had a £1750 65" LG OLED curved screen 3D fucking billion colour engine You fucking Chav, Harold. 7 minutes ago, ChildeHarold said: I replaced it with a £60 47"Toshiba circa 2010. Works fantastic, loads of connections and two HMDI on the side easy to get to from a charity shop. We're you declared bankrupt? Lol. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penny Farthing Posted January 1 Report Share Posted January 1 16 minutes ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said: You fucking Chav, Harold. We're you declared bankrupt? Lol. Be careful .. he has got connections. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChildeHarold Posted January 1 Report Share Posted January 1 4 minutes ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said: You fucking Chav, Harold. We're you declared bankrupt? Lol. The fucking quality of Curry's tv commercials has followed the quality of its electronics, the latest had the usual teen gormless sales "advisors" sporting fake bears that wouldn't look out of place on a normal day on Stamford Hill north London. Another showed them eating paperwork I am still scratching my head over that one. I feel like a cunt just going through the shop door to have an old fashioned "look round" - it's the pits. I've seen better build quality in Toys R Us or Poundland. The assistants can't help but have a pitying way of making you feel inferior for NOT GOING ONLINE. You know, online, the place where nothing seems as it really is and none of your questions are answered by the robot sales assistants with the photogenic faces that pop up fast and furious blocking your search. Further questions are ignored. Any attempt to tie the purchase of a product to the question, "Do you deliver to a flat on the second floor without a lift?" is met with..... nothingness. Telephone calls produce equally useful responses. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted January 1 Report Share Posted January 1 3 hours ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said: You fucking Chav, Harold. We're you declared bankrupt? Lol. I liked my Sony Trinitron. 4 foot wide, 3 foot deep with lumps of concrete in it. Unless Geoff Capes had taken up burglary it was safe. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted January 1 Report Share Posted January 1 4 hours ago, ChildeHarold said: The fucking quality of Curry's tv commercials has followed the quality of its electronics, the latest had the usual teen gormless sales "advisors" sporting fake bears that wouldn't look out of place on a normal day on Stamford Hill north London. Another showed them eating paperwork I am still scratching my head over that one. I feel like a cunt just going through the shop door to have an old fashioned "look round" - it's the pits. I've seen better build quality in Toys R Us or Poundland. The assistants can't help but have a pitying way of making you feel inferior for NOT GOING ONLINE. You know, online, the place where nothing seems as it really is and none of your questions are answered by the robot sales assistants with the photogenic faces that pop up fast and furious blocking your search. Further questions are ignored. Any attempt to tie the purchase of a product to the question, "Do you deliver to a flat on the second floor without a lift?" is met with..... nothingness. Telephone calls produce equally useful responses. You wanna feel old? Go into Argos. As soon as look at one of their ordering screens some pimply youth comes up "would you like some assistance"? I know I've been around the block a few times but I've still got enough brain cells to operate a keyboard to order a garden leaf blower. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChildeHarold Posted January 1 Report Share Posted January 1 1 minute ago, camberwell gypsy said: You wanna feel old? Go into Argos. As soon as look at one of their ordering screens some pimply youth comes up "would you like some assistance"? I know I've been around the block a few times but I've still got enough brain cells to operate a keyboard to order a garden leaf blower. But can you handle the blower? The last time I had a blow job... that's, erhem, another story.... 😛 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted January 1 Report Share Posted January 1 5 minutes ago, ChildeHarold said: But can you handle the blower? The last time I had a blow job... that's, erhem, another story.... 😛 It's so I can blow all the £20 and £50 notes out of the way when I walk through the house. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted January 1 Report Share Posted January 1 1 hour ago, camberwell gypsy said: You wanna feel old? Go into Argos. As soon as look at one of their ordering screens some pimply youth comes up "would you like some assistance"? I know I've been around the block a few times but I've still got enough brain cells to operate a keyboard to order a garden leaf blower. When I was a kid I would ask older people to buy cigarettes for me. Now I’m older, I have to ask kids to buy me a McDonald’s because I’m scared of the PlayStation that you have to order with. Fuck this cunt of a world. It started turning to shit when they got rid of proper telephones with dials that made a strangely satisfying noise. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greg Posted January 1 Report Share Posted January 1 Following the launch of the new brand platform "Beyond Techspectations" through a back-to-school campaign in August, Currys is taking humour to the next level in its latest set of brand films. Created by AMV BBDO, "Beyond Techspectations" aims to showcase how Currys consistently goes the extra mile to deliver the best expertise and tech knowledge through its colleagues and the extensive training they receive. Fulling embracing an approach centred around humour, the series of ads are set to show the retailer’s unrivalled tech expertise and its colleagues’ commitment to going above and beyond in the most engaging and memorable way possible, whether that means eating instruction manuals to gain extra knowledge or cultivating long beards as a symbol of their wisdom.The 30" and 15” films, directed by Greg Bell through Red Studios, will run across TV and digital. As part of the media strategy developed by Spark Foundry, shorter formats will offer a snapshot of the campaign on different platforms.Aisling Lancaster, Head of Brand & Advertising at Currys said, “We know that our customers relish the opportunity to get hands-on with all the amazing tech we sell, and our stores are the best possible place to do this. Not only can you try out all the latest products, but you can rely on our colleagues’ unrivalled tech expertise to help find the right tech for you. These ads allow us to playfully show just how far our colleagues are willing to go to make sure they are tuned-in to today’s tech trends, whilst underscoring how valuable this face-to-face service is to our customers.”AMV BBDO’s creative directors on the campaign David Westland and Jeremy Tribe said, “Currys occupies a unique space in tech retail by doubling down on expertise and personal customer service in an increasingly online market. But it takes a really brave, confident client to let us showcase these qualities through stylised comedy. This campaign is a great second outing for the new Beyond Techspectations platform and we look forward to exploring more funny executions as we develop it together with Currys”.Kazimir Brown, Business Director at Spark Foundry UK said, ‘We’re thrilled to launch the newest iteration of the ‘Beyond Techspectations’ platform. Our plan, aimed at driving mass reach through Linear TV, BVOD & Online Video, allows Currys to engage with audiences nationwide in an authentically tongue-in-cheek tone. The media strategy focuses on showcasing the expertise & commitment to quality championed by Currys’ colleagues. Our campaign will deliver this message at national scale, in high-quality & engaging environments utilising 15”, 30” & 60” formats”. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roadkill Posted January 1 Report Share Posted January 1 Fuck Curry's. And fuck you. Well done for going back to school though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roadkill Posted January 1 Report Share Posted January 1 14 minutes ago, Greg said: Following the launch of the new brand platform "Beyond Techspectations" through a back-to-school campaign in August, Currys is taking humour to the next level in its latest set of brand films. Created by AMV BBDO, "Beyond Techspectations" aims to showcase how Currys consistently goes the extra mile to deliver the best expertise and tech knowledge through its colleagues and the extensive training they receive. Fulling embracing an approach centred around humour, the series of ads are set to show the retailer’s unrivalled tech expertise and its colleagues’ commitment to going above and beyond in the most engaging and memorable way possible, whether that means eating instruction manuals to gain extra knowledge or cultivating long beards as a symbol of their wisdom.The 30" and 15” films, directed by Greg Bell through Red Studios, will run across TV and digital. As part of the media strategy developed by Spark Foundry, shorter formats will offer a snapshot of the campaign on different platforms.Aisling Lancaster, Head of Brand & Advertising at Currys said, “We know that our customers relish the opportunity to get hands-on with all the amazing tech we sell, and our stores are the best possible place to do this. Not only can you try out all the latest products, but you can rely on our colleagues’ unrivalled tech expertise to help find the right tech for you. These ads allow us to playfully show just how far our colleagues are willing to go to make sure they are tuned-in to today’s tech trends, whilst underscoring how valuable this face-to-face service is to our customers.”AMV BBDO’s creative directors on the campaign David Westland and Jeremy Tribe said, “Currys occupies a unique space in tech retail by doubling down on expertise and personal customer service in an increasingly online market. But it takes a really brave, confident client to let us showcase these qualities through stylised comedy. This campaign is a great second outing for the new Beyond Techspectations platform and we look forward to exploring more funny executions as we develop it together with Currys”.Kazimir Brown, Business Director at Spark Foundry UK said, ‘We’re thrilled to launch the newest iteration of the ‘Beyond Techspectations’ platform. Our plan, aimed at driving mass reach through Linear TV, BVOD & Online Video, allows Currys to engage with audiences nationwide in an authentically tongue-in-cheek tone. The media strategy focuses on showcasing the expertise & commitment to quality championed by Currys’ colleagues. Our campaign will deliver this message at national scale, in high-quality & engaging environments utilising 15”, 30” & 60” formats”. See above. And fuck off. Any smarmy shit about how I fucked up the quote and might need technical help and I'll glass you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greg Posted January 1 Report Share Posted January 1 Like the Currys sales team you have "an authentically tongue-in-cheek tone". Why don't you eat an instruction manual to gain extra knowledge and cultivate a long beard as a symbol of your (limited) wisdom. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted January 2 Report Share Posted January 2 53 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said: When I was a kid I would ask older people to buy cigarettes for me. Now I’m older, I have to ask kids to buy me a McDonald’s because I’m scared of the PlayStation that you have to order with. Fuck this cunt of a world. It started turning to shit when they got rid of proper telephones with dials that made a strangely satisfying noise. I'm not bad at that at all. It makes it much better than having to place an order with some cunt who can't even speak the Kings. What I have problems with is car parks. How many times i try to pay at the barrier and no matter how much i try, it won't accept my card when there is fuck all wrong with it. Then I have to press the 'Help' button and them have to try to have a conversation with some cunt attendant who can't speak the Kings. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted January 2 Report Share Posted January 2 34 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: I'm not bad at that at all. It makes it much better than having to place an order with some cunt who can't even speak the Kings. What I have problems with is car parks. How many times i try to pay at the barrier and no matter how much i try, it won't accept my card when there is fuck all wrong with it. Then I have to press the 'Help' button and them have to try to have a conversation with some cunt attendant who can't speak the Kings. I’m sticking with the Queens English. I’m not going to start all that fucking mumbling and stuttering shit like that fat handed Dumbo tribute act that we’ve been saddled with until we get the inevitable ‘Monarch Of Colour’. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roadkill Posted January 2 Report Share Posted January 2 3 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said: I’m sticking with the Queens English. I’m not going to start all that fucking mumbling and stuttering shit like that fat handed Dumbo tribute act that we’ve been saddled with until we get the inevitable ‘Monarch Of Colour’. Indeed. Her Majesty was trained as a mechanic during the war. She could have maintained and driven a Proton easily and for many years past it's intended lifespan. Charlie boy would just end up crying on the side of the road and probably dying of exposure as a result of his hands exploding when he tried to find the bonnet release. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penny Farthing Posted January 2 Report Share Posted January 2 7 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said: I’m sticking with the Queens English. I’m not going to start all that fucking mumbling and stuttering shit like that fat handed Dumbo tribute act that we’ve been saddled with until we get the inevitable ‘Monarch Of Colour’. Like this? .. she's South African and of Zulu, Irish & Indian descent and with all that water she has to be clean. https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-67747565 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
and Posted January 2 Report Share Posted January 2 20 hours ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said: he other TVs ports aren't easily accessible either so I leave them hanging out the cunt Tele, which makes me look a right cunt if I have visitors. TBH, you didn't need the tv HDMI ports for that, it's been obvious to everybody on CC for years (just sayin') 😄 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted January 2 Report Share Posted January 2 HDMI cables are good for connecting laptops to TVs for games. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
and Posted January 2 Report Share Posted January 2 20 hours ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said: You fucking Chav, Harold. We're you declared bankrupt? Lol. Strange how your mentor @Wolfie hasn't been on to you about your abuse of the English language, he's usually so hot on that sort of thing. Maybe he's not singled you out, because you're so very close, and he doesn't want to humiliate you. Typical, one of the ethnic minorities, getting preferential treatment, who would've thought it? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
and Posted January 2 Report Share Posted January 2 7 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: HDMI cables are good for connecting laptops to TVs for games. Games are for fuckin' children, just how old are you? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted January 2 Report Share Posted January 2 12 hours ago, Roadkill said: Indeed. Her Majesty was trained as a mechanic during the war. She could have maintained and driven a Proton easily and for many years past it's intended lifespan. Charlie boy would just end up crying on the side of the road and probably dying of exposure as a result of his hands exploding when he tried to find the bonnet release. Her Majesty would cut quite a dash cruising a post-apocalyptic wasteland in a 1.3 Proton… ‘uh-uh-uh.. A monarch, a quick monarch like yourself, might have a weapon under there’ ’last of the 1.3 interceptors. Would’ve been a shame to blow it up’ 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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