Guest luke swarm Posted March 16, 2016 Report Share Posted March 16, 2016 These cunts are usually found at the head of a large slow moving convoy of vehicles... but they themselves are oblivious of ANYTHING other than the 30 or so metres in front of their car, which incidentally is usually a Honda Jazz. They see a slowly unfolding vista in front but not once do they have the spare brain capacity to determine the rage and frustration being displayed behind them. In addition, they will not dare glance sideways as tractors, lorries and disabled spaz mobiles overtake them with the drivers mouthing obscenities and making masturbation gestures......they cannot glance sideways because their brain capacity is being used to its absolute full and any further neck or eye movement can result in a sudden blackout and careering off the road at a breakneck speed of nearly 28 mph........they must not and indeed cannot look away from the front screen and keep their chin over the steering wheel which is usually in a death grip. Sometimes they have to stop at a junction or a set of lights and of course this presents its own problems. This now means that the cars controls such as handbrake, gears and foot controls must all receive a small period of familiarisation and retraining before any forward motion can be attempted. However this re-acquaintance must never include that superfluous item...the rear view mirror. Cunts Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Bill Stickers Posted March 16, 2016 Report Share Posted March 16, 2016 Excellent nomination. These fucking cunts actually crane their head forward so their chin is overhanging the steering wheel. They use wing mirrors like a cat uses its whiskers - if they scrape something with it then the space is too small. When these fuckers reverse out of a car park, it usually incurs heavy loss of human life and property, leaving the local Morrisons looking like a destruction derby. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Drew P Pissflaps Posted March 16, 2016 Report Share Posted March 16, 2016 Yes, but you know they're approaching by the engine revving at 6000 rpm and the strong smell of burning clutch plate. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted March 16, 2016 Report Share Posted March 16, 2016 I am not aware of any motorist cunt who allows the use of a single brain cell to interfere with his total disregard for anything outside his toxin belching metal box. Cunts the lot of them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted March 16, 2016 Report Share Posted March 16, 2016 I'm pretty sure some bugger on here is going to mention women. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Drew P Pissflaps Posted March 16, 2016 Report Share Posted March 16, 2016 10 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: I'm pretty sure some bugger on here is going to mention women. Not in a nom. about using brain cells. Bad driving habits might attract some comments though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Earl of Punkape Posted March 16, 2016 Report Share Posted March 16, 2016 41 minutes ago, Bill Stickers said: Excellent nomination. These fucking cunts actually crane their head forward so their chin is overhanging the steering wheel. They use wing mirrors like a cat uses its whiskers - if they scrape something with it then the space is too small. When these fuckers reverse out of a car park, it usually incurs heavy loss of human life and property, leaving the local Morrisons looking like a destruction derby. You shop at Morrison's ! Are your offspring feral ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest luke swarm Posted March 16, 2016 Report Share Posted March 16, 2016 Just now, Punkape said: You shop at Morrison's ! Are your offspring feral ? I noticed that ProfB was online only about 10 minutes ago.......and then surprise surprise our other abuse whore pops up straight after with the usual banal sheeplike toss. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Earl of Punkape Posted March 16, 2016 Report Share Posted March 16, 2016 1 minute ago, luke swarm said: I noticed that ProfB was online only about 10 minutes ago.......and then surprise surprise our other abuse whore pops up straight after with the usual banal sheeplike toss. You live next door to one ! lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest luke swarm Posted March 16, 2016 Report Share Posted March 16, 2016 Just now, Punkape said: You live next door to one ! lol. now look what you have done Pinkape....my rib has just fractured with uncontrolled mirth and yes indeed it is lol.........may I kindly request that you pre-warn people before issuing any more spontaneous humorous gems like that one......it will give us a chance to swallow a couple of sedatives to counter any laughter related injuries. excellent work . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Drew P Pissflaps Posted March 16, 2016 Report Share Posted March 16, 2016 7 minutes ago, Punkape said: You live next door to one ! lol. I wish i lived next door to one. Anything has got to be better than my current neighbour, he appears to be a golf playing, range rover driving estate agent who is rather noisy when getting arse raped by his boyfriends. The selfish cunt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Earl of Punkape Posted March 16, 2016 Report Share Posted March 16, 2016 4 minutes ago, Drew P Pissflaps said: I wish i lived next door to one. Anything has got to be better than my current neighbour, he appears to be a golf playing, range rover driving estate agent who is rather noisy when getting arse raped by his boyfriends. The selfish cunt. You should move into a gated gay community. You know it's what you want. lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Bill Stickers Posted March 16, 2016 Report Share Posted March 16, 2016 29 minutes ago, Punkape said: You shop at Morrison's ! Are your offspring feral ? Do you think I class myself as one of the shag sacks who drive in such a manner? These shit drivers tend to be pensioners and successful migrants, thus they shop at Morrisons. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted March 16, 2016 Report Share Posted March 16, 2016 The driver will be wearing one of these... ..and they drive forwards into a parking space, then 3 hours reversing out.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MikeD Posted March 16, 2016 Report Share Posted March 16, 2016 Any cunt who causes a tailback, particularly at rush-hour and due only to the fact that they just fucking feel like driving slow, should be fucking killed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted March 16, 2016 Report Share Posted March 16, 2016 7 minutes ago, MikeD said: Any cunt who causes a tailback, particularly at rush-hour and due only to the fact that they just fucking feel like driving slow, should be fucking killed. Mrs D laughs at me continuously when I'm driving, usually because there is an endless stream of abuse at the cunt in front usually finishing with "YOU'RE NOT FUCKING DEAD YET!!! MOVE..!!!!!!!!..........." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nocti Posted March 16, 2016 Report Share Posted March 16, 2016 I feel that this is quite related. It made me chuckle and cringe like fuck in equal measure. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cuntspotter Posted March 16, 2016 Report Share Posted March 16, 2016 1 hour ago, Punkape said: You shop at Morrison's ! Are your offspring feral ? His aren't but mine are. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted March 17, 2016 Report Share Posted March 17, 2016 14 hours ago, nocti said: I feel that this is quite related. It made me chuckle and cringe like fuck in equal measure. If I had a dashcam I could fill hours with that shit, just going across town would give 5 minutes of it everyday... The biker that ended up on the bonnet.... had that on my bike before. ..but that biker at 9.20 is wrong himself, he was in the other lane... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted March 18, 2016 Report Share Posted March 18, 2016 Mrs Baws only has two brain cells but - as far as I can tell - she uses just one of them when driving. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cuntspotter Posted March 20, 2016 Report Share Posted March 20, 2016 On 16 March 2016 at 8:24 PM, DingTheRioja said: The driver will be wearing one of these... With a pipe in his mouth! ..and they drive forwards into a parking space, then 3 hours reversing out.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted March 20, 2016 Report Share Posted March 20, 2016 10 minutes ago, cuntspotter said: Get yer fucking quotes sorted out, useless cunt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba C Posted March 27, 2016 Report Share Posted March 27, 2016 Can I add to this nom, the fucking drivers who let every cunt out of every junction, thereby exponentially increasing travel time and fucking rage levels. Akin to slow walking cunts, but possibly more fucking annoying as you can't just barge the fucking idiots out of the way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eddie Posted March 27, 2016 Report Share Posted March 27, 2016 44 minutes ago, Bubbles said: Can I add to this nom, the fucking drivers who let every cunt out of every junction, thereby exponentially increasing travel time and fucking rage levels. Akin to slow walking cunts, but possibly more fucking annoying as you can't just barge the fucking idiots out of the way. Just bunny hop your Peppa Pig Scotter up on the pavement and go around them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba C Posted April 15, 2016 Report Share Posted April 15, 2016 Another fucking stupid action of these utter cunts that I experienced this morning, leaving a 2 car gap between their car and the cunt in front of them, maybe for fear of causing a multi-car pile up at the break-neck speeds obtained during a rush hour commute with traffic lights every 200 yards. Commuting during rush hour is a cunt, but why these mongs are attempting to double the length of every tailback is a complete shitty cunt. Fuck off. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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