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The old cunt next to me at the bar


Decimus

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2 hours ago, Decimus said:

I decided to go to the pub after work as it's the school holidays and my kids are cunts who I hate.

As I'm the perfect fucking gentleman, I asked if the pampers wearing old bitch next to me would like to go first, thinking she'll order a sherry and do one within seconds.

Cue a 15 drink order, coupled with endless deliberation over whether one of the cunts in her party would prefer pinot or Chardonnay. Not content with being a piss taking old slag, she also considered herself a comedienne. "Can I have a cherry in the Becks vier. Don't ask why!" She chuckled to the bar man, who then proceeded to spend five fucking minutes trying to find one. I don't need to ask, I know why, you decrepit old cunt. It's because you're apparently a court fucking jester as well as an inconsiderate cunt. 

I hope she's fucking dead within the year.

Judging by the sort of shitholes you go into to get a drink I'd guess you live on a inner city sink estate. You ought to join a downmarket golf club at least you'll get served....

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Guest Quincy Cockfingers
47 minutes ago, Ape said:

I wonder if you could shite in a penguins mouth?

I could certainly try. I think they habitually vomit fish into each other's mouths, so it's not out of the question. 

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What a pile of pooh, you silly slacker Deminge, put more of an effort in man, a few nice words to the inconsiderate 15 drink ordering battleaxe and maybe she would of bought your fucking drink as well...spread a bit more charm and she might of chomped on your tiny cock..you missed the boat here you daft cuntbreed..

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Just now, ThunderCunt said:

What a pile of pooh, you silly slacker Deminge, put more of an effort in man, a few nice words to the inconsiderate 15 drink ordering battleaxe and maybe she would of bought your fucking drink as well...spread a bit more charm and she might of chomped on your tiny cock..you missed the boat here you daft cuntbreed..

Somebody order a cunt?

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Guest Quincy Cockfingers
6 minutes ago, ThunderCunt said:

What a pile of pooh, you silly slacker Deminge, put more of an effort in man, a few nice words to the inconsiderate 15 drink ordering battleaxe and maybe she would of bought your fucking drink as well...spread a bit more charm and she might of chomped on your tiny cock..you missed the boat here you daft cuntbreed..

Shut up you fucking imbecilic cunt. I thought you were dead in a ditch. 

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1 minute ago, ThunderCunt said:

Well you would know wouldn't you..Mmm..must be those clogs you wear and those cloth ears flapping in the wind as they rattle your very small brain..tell me , did you have any luck at the AA meeting tonight..?

You can barely string two words together, you illiterate cretin.

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Guest Quincy Cockfingers
2 minutes ago, ThunderCunt said:

Minger when i want to talk to you then i shall let you know boy, you're up late, well it is the school holidays..

Have you suffered some sort of awful brain injury?

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9 hours ago, Quincy Cockfingers said:

Have you suffered some sort of awful brain injury?

That would imply it had a brain. The more I read of its awful shite, the more I'm inclined to believe that some cunt has logged into CC and left one of those dipping bird things next to their keyboard to tap keys at random. It would explain why everything it says is absolute incomprehensible fucking bollocks.

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Guest Quincy Cockfingers
5 minutes ago, Decimus said:

That would imply it had a brain. The more I read of its awful shite, the more I'm inclined to believe that some cunt has logged into CC and left one of those dipping bird things next to their keyboard to tap keys at random. It would explain why everything it says is absolute incomprehensible fucking bollocks.

I wish he was fucking dead.

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Guest Quincy Cockfingers
3 hours ago, Bubba C said:

I'm pretty sure he is. Between the ears. 

I just realised that Withers is going to be dead relatively soon, being a decrepit old drunkard. It made me think of doing a "Top of the Corpse" chart nom. Manky up there too. It doesn't look too bad actually.

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Guest Bill Stickers
16 minutes ago, Quincy Cockfingers said:

I just realised that Withers is going to be dead relatively soon, being a decrepit old drunkard. It made me think of doing a "Top of the Corpse" chart nom. Manky up there too. It doesn't look too bad actually.

MikeD will be near the foot of the table, naturally. 

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