Guest Snatch Posted January 13, 2017 Report Share Posted January 13, 2017 Looks like the neighbour has a Union Jack on a flagpole. Probably an EDL supporter. Fucking racist. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted January 13, 2017 Report Share Posted January 13, 2017 1 hour ago, Neil said: £29,990 overpriced The stupid fucking cunts will attract no interest at that price unless they use more words like "bijou" and "period". "Period" actually seems particularly apposite here. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted January 13, 2017 Report Share Posted January 13, 2017 10 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said: The stupid fucking cunts will attract no interest at that price unless they use more words like "bijou" and "period". "Period" actually seems particularly apposite here. A man parks his car in Jaywick, as he gets out, a boy walks up to him and says, "give me a fiver and I'll mind your car" the man points to the back seat and says " that's a Pitbull terrier son, he minds my car". The boy replies, "puts out fuckin' fires does he?" 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wolfie Posted January 13, 2017 Report Share Posted January 13, 2017 3 hours ago, The Beast said: http://www.rightmove.co.uk/commercial-property-for-sale/property-63990404.html Fuck me. It's only 200 yards from the beach. What's not to like? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted January 13, 2017 Report Share Posted January 13, 2017 If you want an indication of the intelligence level of the average Jaywick resident, I once saw a Vauxhall Vectra for sale at the top of one of those shitty little roads. The cardboard sign in the windscreen read, "6 mths MOT , proper relyable, goes really farst". I shit you not. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted January 13, 2017 Report Share Posted January 13, 2017 5 hours ago, Manky said: I hope you fucking drown. I would swap ten South East Asian Tsunamis for one good targeted East Anglian tidal surge. By the way, I have a massive property portfolio in the local area, all I have to do is crowbar the security shutters open and there is my bed for the night. Manky, just thought I'd check in. I'm alive and well and thought I'd tell you in case you stayed up all night with guilt at your harsh words. I'll check in again at midnight. Love Decs xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted January 13, 2017 Report Share Posted January 13, 2017 18 minutes ago, Decimus said: Manky, just thought I'd check in. I'm alive and well and thought I'd tell you in case you stayed up all night with guilt at your harsh words. I'll check in again at midnight. Love Decs xx Yes, you keep your mobile dry as you doggy paddle in circles until the tide goes out. My sympathy for you waterlogged fuckers lies in the dictionary between shit and syphilis. Tonight I will sleep lay down without fear of drowning, that is after I turn all the taps on full to try and raise the sea level another 6 inches. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted January 13, 2017 Report Share Posted January 13, 2017 4 minutes ago, Manky said: Tonight I will sleep lay down without fear of drowning, that is after I turn all the taps on full to try and raise the sea level another 6 inches. Yes, I imagine that your hovel is quite safe atop the Arndale centre in the temporary shanty town that has been erected there. I won't lose any sleep worrying that you've suddenly gained access to running water for the first time in your miserable 60 years of northern peasant life. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ratcum Posted January 13, 2017 Report Share Posted January 13, 2017 When I see this I keep thinking 'Jedward Evacuation' instead. This could be their entire persons or just their arses. orv they might be evacuated out of Bill Stickers' arse Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted January 14, 2017 Report Share Posted January 14, 2017 12 hours ago, Decimus said: Manky, just thought I'd check in. I'm alive and well and thought I'd tell you in case you stayed up all night with guilt at your harsh words. I'll check in again at midnight. Love Decs xx As Decs didn't update me on his ordeal at midnight, I can only happily assume the cunt has drowned. Fucking party time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted January 14, 2017 Report Share Posted January 14, 2017 4 hours ago, Manky said: As Decs didn't update me on his ordeal at midnight, I can only happily assume the cunt has drowned. Fucking party time. Well if he is floating in the North Sea it will be difficult to distinguish him from all the other turds. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted January 15, 2017 Report Share Posted January 15, 2017 On 13/01/2017 at 3:43 PM, nocti said: One of the key features: "Balcony". I genuinely cracked the fuck up. When you're on the estate agents page, click the "Street View" link... On 13/01/2017 at 8:34 PM, Decimus said: Yes, I imagine that your hovel is quite safe atop the Arndale centre in the temporary shanty town that has been erected there. I won't lose any sleep worrying that you've suddenly gained access to running water for the first time in your miserable 60 years of northern peasant life. I genuinely hope you have now got access to running water... ...about 40 billion gallons of saltwater running at 35mph. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest I know that Cunt Posted January 15, 2017 Report Share Posted January 15, 2017 Didn't happen - fucking robbed of a good laugh. Ah well better luck next time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted January 15, 2017 Report Share Posted January 15, 2017 2 hours ago, I know that Cunt said: Didn't happen - fucking robbed of a good laugh. Ah well better luck next time. Just imagine Drew sitting on his roof tied to the chimney all night, because he hasn't got an upstairs. That should cheer you up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Snatch Posted January 15, 2017 Report Share Posted January 15, 2017 On 1/13/2017 at 7:51 PM, Wolfie said: It's only 200 yards from the beach. What's not to like? It's got a lot of potential for an arsonist. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wizardsleeve Posted January 15, 2017 Report Share Posted January 15, 2017 On 1/13/2017 at 10:10 AM, Noakes said: Frank's house. Where are the skinned animal carcasses used to harvest his wigs? Also, there is a noticeable absence of flies for an abode we all know to be knee deep in stale piss and liquidy curry based bowel evacuations. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted January 15, 2017 Report Share Posted January 15, 2017 2 hours ago, Witheredscrote said: Just imagine Drew sitting on his roof tied to the chimney all night, because he hasn't got an upstairs. That should cheer you up. Withers, I've only just washed up on the beach. Is Ding dead yet? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted January 15, 2017 Report Share Posted January 15, 2017 1 hour ago, Decimus said: Withers, I've only just washed up on the beach. Is Ding dead yet? He is pretty limp and wet, but there again, he always was. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted January 15, 2017 Report Share Posted January 15, 2017 1 hour ago, Decimus said: Withers, I've only just washed up on the beach. Is Ding dead yet? You were always washed up, about to the same extent Frank is/was. As for dead, no, you'll be drowning in the my effluent before I even get my feet wet, you bog-trotter. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tata Steely Dan Posted January 15, 2017 Report Share Posted January 15, 2017 On 1/12/2017 at 7:08 PM, I know that Cunt said: No apparently its a lovely little village in Essex as you can see below. How nice............ It looks a lot like Cwmbran That looks like most of Russia and Eastern Europe once you get out the concrete jungles and historic old towns of the big cities. The place looks like it would benefit from a good flood. Cunts in places like that haven't worked in three generations, but somehow think Brexit and Nigel Farage will fix all of this (not that they actually want to work). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted January 15, 2017 Report Share Posted January 15, 2017 23 minutes ago, Tata Steely Dan said: That looks like most of Russia and Eastern Europe once you get out the concrete jungles and historic old towns of the big cities. The place looks like it would benefit from a good flood. Cunts in places like that haven't worked in three generations, but somehow think Brexit and Nigel Farage will fix all of this (not that they actually want to work). It makes Sunny side trailer park from Trailer park boys look like Venice Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted January 15, 2017 Report Share Posted January 15, 2017 1 hour ago, camberwell gypsy said: It makes Sunny side trailer park from Trailer park boys look like Venice I've just looked at some of the "story lines" of Trailer Park Boys, and it looks like it was cooked up by Catherine Tates less intelligent brother... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roadkill Posted January 15, 2017 Report Share Posted January 15, 2017 7 minutes ago, DingTheRioja said: I've just looked at some of the "story lines" of Trailer Park Boys, and it looks like it was cooked up by Catherine Tates less intelligent brother... It's no Hamlet but it's funny as fuck in places. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted January 16, 2017 Report Share Posted January 16, 2017 2 hours ago, Roadkill said: It's no Hamlet but it's funny as fuck in places. "Forsooth vacate the fucking stage you fucking drunk squire Layhee". "Verily thou wilst slide down the shit pole for thou is a cunt methinks" 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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