Stubby Pecker Posted January 6, 2018 Report Share Posted January 6, 2018 3 minutes ago, Couldn't give a shit said: My cousin was in 40 commando about 15 years ago and told me a similar tale. Did she have some rather incriminating photographs taken of her by any chance? I wouldn't know too much on that front. At the time I was a disheveled physical wreck living on about 2 hours kip a day. From what I remember she was very tall a good looking and must have had a hard time knowing all the nods weren't happy that they were doing it the hard way and getting thrashed till our eyeballs bled. The course itself (the pongo version as well...) is bullshit; as long as you can operate in the field under extreme duress then I couldn't get a fuck if they're got tits and a hairy fanny. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted January 6, 2018 Report Share Posted January 6, 2018 31 minutes ago, Couldn't give a shit said: I see your point but SAS is a different league. I know a couple of real hard bastards who cracked during selection and they had signed up with the sole intention of getting in the 22nd. Some of the psychological shit they put candidates through is nothing short of sadistic. A woman will simply not make it through without it being watered down and this will fuck with the rest of the regiment's morale. I've had to sit through Pitch Perfect 3 with Rebel 'fucking' Wilson. The SAS selection process holds no fears for me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frank Posted January 6, 2018 Report Share Posted January 6, 2018 29 minutes ago, Wolfie said: Thanks for the advice. Why wouldn't I value the opinion of someone who is, for want of a better phrase, standing second in line firmly behind Punkape in the cooler stakes? You've been warned. Any further insulting or disrespectful remarks and you'll be gone. Understood? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wolfie Posted January 6, 2018 Report Share Posted January 6, 2018 3 minutes ago, Frank said: You've been warned. Any further insulting or disrespectful remarks and you'll be gone. Understood? Soon after joining this site, such was the reputation which preceded you, I expected a full Sunday pub roast with all the trimmings. Since you've been posting after your long ban, I seem to have been served what can best be described as a Tesco Value microwave dinner. Shame. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubby Pecker Posted January 6, 2018 Report Share Posted January 6, 2018 3 minutes ago, Wolfie said: Soon after joining this site, such was the reputation which preceded you, I expected a full Sunday pub roast with all the trimmings. Since you've been posting after your long ban, I seem to have been served what can best be described as a Tesco Value microwave dinner. Shame. Franks not the "vile" cunt of yesteryear and his legend is only being perpetuated by himself. Those that remember the malevolent nastiness he exuded are disgusted by his wet pants output of late. Even pen hates the baldy, cancer ridden cunts guts these days Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Bill Stickers Posted January 6, 2018 Report Share Posted January 6, 2018 20 minutes ago, Stubby Pecker said: Franks not the "vile" cunt of yesteryear and his legend is only being perpetuated by himself. Those that remember the malevolent nastiness he exuded are disgusted by his wet pants output of late. Even pen hates the baldy, cancer ridden cunts guts these days Yet he can still dispatch you any time he pleases, you lowly piece of bottom feeding krill. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Couldn't give a shit Posted January 6, 2018 Report Share Posted January 6, 2018 Just now, Stubby Pecker said: I wouldn't know too much on that front. At the time I was a disheveled physical wreck living on about 2 hours kip a day. From what I remember she was very tall a good looking and must have had a hard time knowing all the nods weren't happy that they were doing it the hard way and getting thrashed till our eyeballs bled. The course itself (the pongo version as well...) is bullshit; as long as you can operate in the field under extreme duress then I couldn't get a fuck if they're got tits and a hairy fanny. Spent a couple of amusing weeks with a female Woopert at Catterick. She was so keen to prove herself I think she would of dropped her keks and had a shit in front of the chaps if only we would stop taking the piss out of her. In the end she fucking lost it and started screaming in my face about the hardships she had endured to "earn" her rank. Looking back, it must of resembled the Bigus Dickus scene from Life of Brian. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Couldn't give a shit Posted January 6, 2018 Report Share Posted January 6, 2018 Just now, camberwell gypsy said: I've had to sit through Pitch Perfect 3 with Rebel 'fucking' Wilson. The SAS selection process holds no fears for me. It should. There's no Tampax machines on the Brecon Beacons sweetheart. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ratcum Posted January 6, 2018 Report Share Posted January 6, 2018 Anyone who has issue with women joining our special forces has issue with themselves. My experience of women in a professional capacity is they'll stop at nothing to be the best. Men will only be able to cope with that if they push themselves even further. Women also give me the horn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted January 7, 2018 Report Share Posted January 7, 2018 55 minutes ago, Couldn't give a shit said: It should. There's no Tampax machines on the Brecon Beacons sweetheart. Don't need 'em. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Earl of Punkape Posted January 7, 2018 Report Share Posted January 7, 2018 14 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: Don't need 'em. Don’t need you either buttercup... lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Quincy Cockfingers Posted January 7, 2018 Report Share Posted January 7, 2018 1 hour ago, William T.D. Stickers said: Yet he can still dispatch you any time he pleases, you lowly piece of bottom feeding krill. 1 hour ago, William T.D. Stickers said: Yet he can still dispatch you any time he pleases, you lowly piece of bottom feeding krill. Yet for the dirty wretch he is, he does not cross the privacy line, and I weirdly like the cunt and his mental tunes, but there is one who isn’t that cool. Bubba- why have you been doing what you have? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted January 7, 2018 Report Share Posted January 7, 2018 4 hours ago, Punkape said: My family has always served with the Irish Guards and the Royal Irish Rangers.....now the Royal Irish.... We made our money in the sugar plantations of the Caribbean... lol. lol. The only think you’ve ever served is two pints of Wifebeater in your local Wetherspoons. Wanker. Lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cap'n Cunt Posted January 7, 2018 Report Share Posted January 7, 2018 Having ladies on the battlefield is a bad idea. Imagine coming across a fresh female corpse in the heat of battle, perhaps with her clothes blown off. You'd have to stop shooting and have a wank, or perhaps a sneaky finger if it was still warm. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Erroreptile404 Posted January 7, 2018 Report Share Posted January 7, 2018 1 hour ago, Ape said: The only think you’ve ever served is two pints of Wifebeater in your local Wetherspoons. Wanker. Lol. Fuckin hell wifebeater they reduced the percentage of that shit years ago due to how strong it was. Went off my tits a few times on the wifebeater before it got pussified. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubby Pecker Posted January 7, 2018 Report Share Posted January 7, 2018 3 hours ago, William T.D. Stickers said: Yet he can still dispatch you any time he pleases, you lowly piece of bottom feeding krill. Frank knows where I live apparently and I'm happy to accommodate him should he pop round with prezzies for the kids. I bow to your superior knowledge on the ecology of krill, please feel free to elaborate you fucking dunce. Im glad you're back bill, your unrivalled thickness makes us all feel like genius superhumans in your presence Pig shit thick stupid fucking wanker Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted January 7, 2018 Report Share Posted January 7, 2018 9 hours ago, Wolfie said: Soon after joining this site, such was the reputation which preceded you, I expected a full Sunday pub roast with all the trimmings. Since you've been posting after your long ban, I seem to have been served what can best be described as a Tesco Value microwave dinner. Shame. Ape entirely recommends them. Especially the turkey Christmas special. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted January 7, 2018 Report Share Posted January 7, 2018 I was in the SAS for 20 years. (Saturday's and Sundays) We also did Tuesday evenings and Friday nights plus summer camp and training courses so our (unofficial) title was TEFNSASPSCATC which didn't roll off the tongue too well. I was highly trained in scorched earth tactics. Drinking anything potable and many things not potable to prevent it falling into the hands of the 3rd Shock Army. I was never the 2nd man on the balcony but often the 1st man in the bar. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest luke swarm Posted January 7, 2018 Report Share Posted January 7, 2018 14 hours ago, Punkape said: We made our money in the sugar plantations of the Caribbean.... Hence your hereditary affinity for Black Cock lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Earl of Punkape Posted January 7, 2018 Report Share Posted January 7, 2018 28 minutes ago, luke swarm said: Hence your hereditary affinity for Black Cock lol. Less of your penchant’s please.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted January 7, 2018 Report Share Posted January 7, 2018 15 minutes ago, Punkape said: Less of your penchant’s please.... I admire the cool, calm and measured way that you deal with the plebs on this site Punkers. Especially in view of the fact that you are unfairly victimised by the moderators. May God be with you at this difficult time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Bill Stickers Posted January 7, 2018 Report Share Posted January 7, 2018 Is this the worst corner thread in recent memory? A bunch of diabetic lonely Walter Mittys trading fictional war stories. Say you shot bin laden or something. We don't believe your bollocks about being in the TA. If you're going to make up a load of old cock, at least make it interesting. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted January 7, 2018 Report Share Posted January 7, 2018 1 hour ago, William T.D. Stickers said: Is this the worst corner thread in recent memory? A bunch of diabetic lonely Walter Mittys trading fictional war stories. Say you shot bin laden or something. We don't believe your bollocks about being in the TA. If you're going to make up a load of old cock, at least make it interesting. Bill, my great uncle was a member of the FFI, and in 1944 he single handedly captured a MK2 Tiger tank, using a tin opener, and persuading the Commander to surrender, by clamping his testicles in an escargot clamp. He was awarded the Michelin Star for his heroism. I hope this is of interest to you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted January 7, 2018 Report Share Posted January 7, 2018 1 hour ago, William T.D. Stickers said: Is this the worst corner thread in recent memory? A bunch of diabetic lonely Walter Mittys trading fictional war stories. Say you shot bin laden or something. We don't believe your bollocks about being in the TA. If you're going to make up a load of old cock, at least make it interesting. I am the last fucker who wants this site to become a clone of ARRSE but to make any topic subject to special rules is against all the laws of nature and science. I suspect you, Decs and a couple of others would like the site to be a monumental group hug then pick on the fat kid. By the way, I think you are a cunt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest luke swarm Posted January 7, 2018 Report Share Posted January 7, 2018 3 minutes ago, Witheredscrote said: Bill, my great uncle was a member of the FFI, and in 1944 he single handedly captured a MK2 Tiger tank, using a tin opener, and persuading the Commander to surrender, by clamping his testicles in an escargot clamp. He was awarded the Michelin Star for his heroism. I hope this is of interest to you. pssht, that's nothing, My uncle was in the Royal Regiment of ParadentalHygenists. He saw action in the Trenches of Ypres and was decorated with a George cross for bravery, when he carried out a upper/lower wisdom teeth abrasive polish whilst under fire from the filthy Bosch. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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