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Roadkill

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I was browsing the BBC News website last night before bed on my phone only to quickly glance at a picture of what I first thought was another report of delicate SJW's demanding more safe spaces in universities. I'm always up for a laugh, so I quickly scrolled back up to be greeted by the cuntiest image I think I've ever seen:

_104845519_gettyimages-871114904.jpg

It's an article titled "Voice changes may show your date fancies you" (https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-46591185) and why exactly they've chosen this particular freak show as the main image I don't fucking know. But its sick.

Lets start with the "man" (The one in yellow if you're already confused). Look at this sick, pathetic excuse for masculinity. Even his man bun - the most shameful hairstyle an adult male can wear - is half arsed in its execution. And why the fuck would he wear a mustard-yellow cardigan on his "first date" with the swamp monster across from him? Look at that cunt of a beard that is still growing in patchy despite him clearly being in his mid-thirties. I wouldn't be surprised if the grotty twats still wearing his pyjama bottoms - clearly very little effort has been made in his appearance.

Not that effort would have to be made to lure the teal-headed, foundation-smeared, crooked-toothed hag he's conversing with back to his bedsit. Just look at that fucking mess sitting on her scalp. What is it with people these days and growing long hair only to hold it up in the messiest way possible? Why is she using a tea towel to support the entire fucking thing and, most importantly of all - why is it fucking teal? When did Sideshow Mel become a fucking trend setter? Has this woman actually painted her teeth to look this disgusting? Why has she chosen "Alcoholic's Liver" as her go-to shade for lipstick? I suppose looking somewhat different to the masses is a good way to attract a date, but when all of the questions  about your appearance amount to "Why the fuck have you made yourself look like an autistic mime?" You've probably gone a bit too far...

Just look at the wider scene for this image also: The handles on those cups of what must be 100% vegan Soy Cream coffee are ridiculous, both the twats have their fucking phones out, and the sugar needs refilled soon. I think this is a shameless ruse by the BBC to trick us into thinking this is what heterosexual dating looks like in this day in age. I'm sorry but if I saw these two chatting away in a cafe, I would simply label it a friendly meeting between gay friends and if I overheard any conversation steering towards sexual activity I would feel responsibly inclined to warn Mr. Man Bun that he's in for a bit of a surprise unless Count Spackula there turns out to be a pre-op tranny.

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3 minutes ago, judgetwi said:

You’re taking this all a bit personally aren’t you? Even the failure to top up the sugar is winding you up.

You need to calm down a bit mate.

 

They're cunts, Judge. Cunts of the highest order. How can you look at this image and not be disgusted to the very core of your being? The sugar dispenser is especially triggering for me because I'm a cleaner - I've lost count of how many times I've had to hoover sugar granules out of carpets when some cunt can't get to the last bit of sugar in the bottom and inevitably ends up spilling it everywhere trying to unscrew the lid. 

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Just now, Roadkill said:

Fucking hell! How'd he get the strimmer so close without cutting himself? 

A valid question, the answer to which I've been searching for over a year.

With his tiny, fliddy T-Rex arms, I'm surprised that Stubby has the dexterity to hunch over and hold his maggot whilst taking a piss, let alone go wild with a pair of Poundland clippers.

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1 hour ago, judgetwi said:

You’re taking this all a bit personally aren’t you? Even the failure to top up the sugar is winding you up.

The very presence of the sugar is a heartless reminder of the slave trade perpetuated by the white phallocracy in the West Indies. I'm surprised that got past the BBC censors.

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2 hours ago, Roadkill said:

The handles on those cups of what must be 100% vegan Soy Cream coffee are ridiculous, both the twats have their fucking phones out

Where are their fucking vapes then? You just know they've got some Raspberry Marshmallow Spunk Wank flavour secreted somewhere about their persons...

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Guest Wizardsleeve
2 hours ago, Roadkill said:

They're cunts, Judge. Cunts of the highest order. How can you look at this image and not be disgusted to the very core of your being? The sugar dispenser is especially triggering for me because I'm a cleaner - I've lost count of how many times I've had to hoover sugar granules out of carpets when some cunt can't get to the last bit of sugar in the bottom and inevitably ends up spilling it everywhere trying to unscrew the lid. 

Maybe they're his children?  I can't say with any amount of certainty.

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4 hours ago, Roadkill said:

I was browsing the BBC News website last night before bed on my phone only to quickly glance at a picture of what I first thought was another report of delicate SJW's demanding more safe spaces in universities. I'm always up for a laugh, so I quickly scrolled back up to be greeted by the cuntiest image I think I've ever seen:

_104845519_gettyimages-871114904.jpg

It's an article titled "Voice changes may show your date fancies you" (https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-46591185) and why exactly they've chosen this particular freak show as the main image I don't fucking know. But its sick.

Lets start with the "man" (The one in yellow if you're already confused). Look at this sick, pathetic excuse for masculinity. Even his man bun - the most shameful hairstyle an adult male can wear - is half arsed in its execution. And why the fuck would he wear a mustard-yellow cardigan on his "first date" with the swamp monster across from him? Look at that cunt of a beard that is still growing in patchy despite him clearly being in his mid-thirties. I wouldn't be surprised if the grotty twats still wearing his pyjama bottoms - clearly very little effort has been made in his appearance.

Not that effort would have to be made to lure the teal-headed, foundation-smeared, crooked-toothed hag he's conversing with back to his bedsit. Just look at that fucking mess sitting on her scalp. What is it with people these days and growing long hair only to hold it up in the messiest way possible? Why is she using a tea towel to support the entire fucking thing and, most importantly of all - why is it fucking teal? When did Sideshow Mel become a fucking trend setter? Has this woman actually painted her teeth to look this disgusting? Why has she chosen "Alcoholic's Liver" as her go-to shade for lipstick? I suppose looking somewhat different to the masses is a good way to attract a date, but when all of the questions  about your appearance amount to "Why the fuck have you made yourself look like an autistic mime?" You've probably gone a bit too far...

Just look at the wider scene for this image also: The handles on those cups of what must be 100% vegan Soy Cream coffee are ridiculous, both the twats have their fucking phones out, and the sugar needs refilled soon. I think this is a shameless ruse by the BBC to trick us into thinking this is what heterosexual dating looks like in this day in age. I'm sorry but if I saw these two chatting away in a cafe, I would simply label it a friendly meeting between gay friends and if I overheard any conversation steering towards sexual activity I would feel responsibly inclined to warn Mr. Man Bun that he's in for a bit of a surprise unless Count Spackula there turns out to be a pre-op tranny.

Are you Gok Kwan? 

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4 hours ago, Roadkill said:

I was browsing the BBC News website last night before bed on my phone only to quickly glance at a picture of what I first thought was another report of delicate SJW's demanding more safe spaces in universities. I'm always up for a laugh, so I quickly scrolled back up to be greeted by the cuntiest image I think I've ever seen:

_104845519_gettyimages-871114904.jpg

It's an article titled "Voice changes may show your date fancies you" (https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-46591185) and why exactly they've chosen this particular freak show as the main image I don't fucking know. But its sick.

Lets start with the "man" (The one in yellow if you're already confused). Look at this sick, pathetic excuse for masculinity. Even his man bun - the most shameful hairstyle an adult male can wear - is half arsed in its execution. And why the fuck would he wear a mustard-yellow cardigan on his "first date" with the swamp monster across from him? Look at that cunt of a beard that is still growing in patchy despite him clearly being in his mid-thirties. I wouldn't be surprised if the grotty twats still wearing his pyjama bottoms - clearly very little effort has been made in his appearance.

Not that effort would have to be made to lure the teal-headed, foundation-smeared, crooked-toothed hag he's conversing with back to his bedsit. Just look at that fucking mess sitting on her scalp. What is it with people these days and growing long hair only to hold it up in the messiest way possible? Why is she using a tea towel to support the entire fucking thing and, most importantly of all - why is it fucking teal? When did Sideshow Mel become a fucking trend setter? Has this woman actually painted her teeth to look this disgusting? Why has she chosen "Alcoholic's Liver" as her go-to shade for lipstick? I suppose looking somewhat different to the masses is a good way to attract a date, but when all of the questions  about your appearance amount to "Why the fuck have you made yourself look like an autistic mime?" You've probably gone a bit too far...

Just look at the wider scene for this image also: The handles on those cups of what must be 100% vegan Soy Cream coffee are ridiculous, both the twats have their fucking phones out, and the sugar needs refilled soon. I think this is a shameless ruse by the BBC to trick us into thinking this is what heterosexual dating looks like in this day in age. I'm sorry but if I saw these two chatting away in a cafe, I would simply label it a friendly meeting between gay friends and if I overheard any conversation steering towards sexual activity I would feel responsibly inclined to warn Mr. Man Bun that he's in for a bit of a surprise unless Count Spackula there turns out to be a pre-op tranny.

Rubbish. Faggot. 

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6 minutes ago, Frank said:

If you ever overload this site again with lengthy posts and drawings, I promise I’ll find you and hurt you. 

I await our meeting with baited breath and a sturdy half-brick, Frank. Come at me with all you've got - I'll pull your spindly legs off like the spider you are and wash you down the drain with the rest of the worthless filth. Fuck off back to 2016 where you actually mattered.

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2 minutes ago, Roadkill said:

I await our meeting with baited breath and a sturdy half-brick, Frank. Come at me with all you've got - I'll pull your spindly legs off like the spider you are and wash you down the drain with the rest of the worthless filth. Fuck off back to 2016 where you actually mattered.

Joking aside, I know who and where you are, RK. I’ll see you on the 2nd floor...

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3 minutes ago, Iam Ape said:

Fuck off Frank, you tedious wanker. We’ve heard the same shit time after time. Nobody, and I do mean nobody, gives a fuck what you say.

Let him ramble on, Ape. I find it quite amusing - like a past-its-prime lion with incontinence and a collapsed back end trying to intimidate a fit young member of the pride. Attenburough could do a two hour documentary on this cunts fall from grace. 

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1 minute ago, Iam Ape said:

Fuck off Frank, you tedious wanker. We’ve heard the same shit time after time. Nobody, and I do mean nobody, gives a fuck what you say.

Ape I’m in some faux fancy hotel/restaurant in Dorset.. table for one. When seated,  they removed my imaginary companion’s Christmas cracker. 

http://imgbox.com/vtoSI8Z2

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2 minutes ago, Roadkill said:

Let him ramble on, Ape. I find it quite amusing - like a past-its-prime lion with incontinence and a collapsed back end trying to intimidate a fit young member of the pride. Attenburough could do a two hour documentary on this cunts fall from grace. 

Can everybody stop fucking nicking my material! I did the 'past it lion with shit dribbling down its back leg' angle last week. 

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