The strange and recent phenomena of people who seemed healthy and wouldn’t in normal times be OK one day and 3 days later be dead.

[Goober]

6 hours ago, Bubba C said:

I’m glad you posted an apology for stating that the vaccine is responsible for every footballer who hits the deck.
 

Now, moving on to more pressing matters, I’ve got frozen shoulder and it’s killing me. As the third most qualified medical expert on here after lcs and king billy, what do you recommend? (I’ll await numerous suggestions of ways to kill myself from the less educated members). 

Fuck me, Bubs. I've got that following on from bursitis. It's playing merry fucking havoc with my ability to shoot defenceless feathery cunts. 

Several options:

1 - Just wait it out. It normally sorts itself out after a few years. 

2 - Physio, home exercise, ice packs and heat treatment, which together hurt like fuck. Give it up after a month and revert to option 1.

3 - Buy a sonic contraption from the net for a hundred quid, use it for a few weeks, realise it's shit, throw it in the bin and revert to option 1.

Hope that helps. 

[Decimus]

36 minutes ago, Goober said:

Fuck me, Bubs. I've got that following on from bursitis. It's playing merry fucking havoc with my ability to shoot defenceless feathery cunts. 

Several options:

1 - Just wait it out. It normally sorts itself out after a few years. 

2 - Physio, home exercise, ice packs and heat treatment, which together hurt like fuck. Give it up after a month and revert to option 1.

3 - Buy a sonic contraption from the net for a hundred quid, use it for a few weeks, realise it's shit, throw it in the bin and revert to option 1.

Hope that helps. 

I've got this fucking cock sucker as well, every morning I wake up and the cunt feels deader than Ming. I haven't bothered with the doctor precisely because I assumed all of the above, so cheers for confirming there's fuck all I can do about it.

[Dyslexic cnut]

46 minutes ago, Decimus said:

I've got this fucking cock sucker as well, every morning I wake up and the cunt feels deader than Ming. I haven't bothered with the doctor precisely because I assumed all of the above, so cheers for confirming there's fuck all I can do about it.

You can always opt for what I recently have. Three r/cuff tears sutured, one bolted into the arm, calcification filed & shaved and ligaments re-attached. 6-7 titanium pins now. Six months of physio to follow. On the plus side, the morphine/oramorph was fuckin superb with the right music on of course. Still can’t sleep on the fucker. The shoulder is the body’s very own cuntjoint for sure. Good luck…

[Bubba C]

1 hour ago, Goober said:

Fuck me, Bubs. I've got that following on from bursitis. It's playing merry fucking havoc with my ability to shoot defenceless feathery cunts. 

Several options:

1 - Just wait it out. It normally sorts itself out after a few years. 

2 - Physio, home exercise, ice packs and heat treatment, which together hurt like fuck. Give it up after a month and revert to option 1.

3 - Buy a sonic contraption from the net for a hundred quid, use it for a few weeks, realise it's shit, throw it in the bin and revert to option 1.

Hope that helps. 

 

1 hour ago, Decimus said:

I've got this fucking cock sucker as well, every morning I wake up and the cunt feels deader than Ming. I haven't bothered with the doctor precisely because I assumed all of the above, so cheers for confirming there's fuck all I can do about it.

It’s an absolute fucking cunt. My shoulder is literally fucked. Frozen shoulder, bursitis, torn rotator and a damaged bicep. 

Been fucked for the best part of 3 years, and now going private for surgery to try and get some of it fixed. 
 

Luckily it’s my non-wanking arm or I’d be fucking tamping. 
 

The one thing that I found helps more than physio, heat and ice, is cupping (of the shoulder, not the balls). Find a good massage/sports therapist and see if they do cupping. 
 

You’ll look like a northerner’s wife after it due to the bruising, but fuck me is it worth it. 

[Goober]

1 hour ago, Decimus said:

I've got this fucking cock sucker as well, every morning I wake up and the cunt feels deader than Ming. I haven't bothered with the doctor precisely because I assumed all of the above, so cheers for confirming there's fuck all I can do about it.

Seems like a very high prevalence amongst the punters. Must be covid vaccine related despite you not having had one and mine and Bubba's conditions developing before the vaccines. 

I demand a public enquiry. 

[Goober]

1 hour ago, Decimus said:

I've got this fucking cock sucker as well, every morning I wake up and the cunt feels deader than Ming. I haven't bothered with the doctor precisely because I assumed all of the above, so cheers for confirming there's fuck all I can do about it.

As long as its definitely frozen shoulder... If there's bursitis too that needs a corticosteroid injection. 

Just try to keep it mobile as much as possible, or before you know it you'll be in the John McCain phase. 

[Dyslexic cnut]

5 minutes ago, Bubba C said:

 

It’s an absolute fucking cunt. My shoulder is literally fucked. Frozen shoulder, bursitis, torn rotator and a damaged bicep. 

Been fucked for the best part of 3 years, and now going private for surgery to try and get some of it fixed. 
 

Luckily it’s my non-wanking arm or I’d be fucking tamping. 
 

The one thing that I found helps more than physio, heat and ice, is cupping (of the shoulder, not the balls). Find a good massage/sports therapist and see if they do cupping. 
 

You’ll look like a northerner’s wife after it due to the bruising, but fuck me is it worth it. 

They reattached my short-stem bicep which had pinged off. You can buy one of those Cryo-cuff things which pump iced water around the shoulder…superb. Then fill it with warm water. My private medical policy picked up the bill but they’re not that expensive (£135-ish) It’s fuckin sleep that’s the problem though so I’m still kipping with the shoulder sling on. I’d been waking up in agony due to Corner nightmares and throwing imaginary punches at various cunts on here while I slept.

[Goober]

11 minutes ago, Bubba C said:

 

It’s an absolute fucking cunt. My shoulder is literally fucked. Frozen shoulder, bursitis, torn rotator and a damaged bicep. 

Been fucked for the best part of 3 years, and now going private for surgery to try and get some of it fixed. 
 

Luckily it’s my non-wanking arm or I’d be fucking tamping. 
 

The one thing that I found helps more than physio, heat and ice, is cupping (of the shoulder, not the balls). Find a good massage/sports therapist and see if they do cupping. 
 

You’ll look like a northerner’s wife after it due to the bruising, but fuck me is it worth it. 

Surgery, the nuclear option. Hydrodistension plus repair of the rotator cuff by any chance? The former has pretty poor success rates. 

[Roadkill]

24 minutes ago, Goober said:

Surgery, the nuclear option. Hydrodistension plus repair of the rotator cuff by any chance? The former has pretty poor success rates. 

I'll amputate it for a tenner, @Bubba C. Clearly its no coincidence that multiple punters are coming down with the same shoulder injury, so the money will go towards a medical investigation to find out what's going on.

[Mrs Roops]

2 hours ago, The Beast said:

A bit of taking the man and not the ball there. These mRNA vaccines have cardiac risk associated to them. It is important to try to establish who is at most risk and what, if anything, can be done to mitigate these risks.

What ball? The way KB was describing it he saw a talking head tapping the side of his nose saying, "I know stuff. But it's secret. Trust me anyway". C'mon!

FWIW, I thought Dr Carpenter was pretty impressive in providing in layman's terms the issues at play, but even he had some salient caveats.

[Eric Cuntman]

6 hours ago, Cuntybaws said:

Don't kill yourself. I'm sure the majority of members would far prefer to see your suffering prolonged.

That was a sneakily adapted bit of Thomas Harris right there.

[Eric Cuntman]

38 minutes ago, Goober said:

Seems like a very high prevalence amongst the punters. Must be covid vaccine related despite you not having had one and mine and Bubba's conditions developing before the vaccines. 

I demand a public enquiry. 

Seems like none of you cunts would be any good in a fight. 

[Bubba C]

50 minutes ago, Goober said:

Surgery, the nuclear option. Hydrodistension plus repair of the rotator cuff by any chance? The former has pretty poor success rates. 

Think they’re just chopping the cunt off and fixing a bionic wanking spanner on with any luck.
 

I’ve had steroid injections, hydrodilatation, physio, massages, the aforementioned cupping, but it’s still a massive bastard. 
 

I never thought the simple act of putting a dressing gown on could induce so much fucking pain.  

[Bubba C]

1 hour ago, Goober said:

Seems like a very high prevalence amongst the punters. Must be covid vaccine related despite you not having had one and mine and Bubba's conditions developing before the vaccines. 

I demand a public enquiry. 

@The Beastcould probably clear this up after he’s finished trawling the daily mail  for more evidence of his bacofoil-sponsored theories. 

[Goober]

30 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Seems like none of you cunts would be any good in a fight. 

Depends whether I'm allowed to bring my shotgun. 

[Roadkill]

Just now, Goober said:

Depends whether I'm allowed to bring my shotgun. 

And the haemorrhoids pillow to protect your shoulder from the recoil. 

[Goober]

8 minutes ago, Bubba C said:

Think they’re just chopping the cunt off and fixing a bionic wanking spanner on with any luck.
 

I’ve had steroid injections, hydrodilatation, physio, massages, the aforementioned cupping, but it’s still a massive bastard. 
 

I never thought the simple act of putting a dressing gown on could induce so much fucking pain.  

Mine hurt like merry fuck when I had bursitis and getting a jumper on and off was a serious challenge, but the steroid injection sorted that. Now I just have limited movement but no pain at all, except for when I do the physio exercises of course. For me it's just going to be a case of waiting. It's quite common amongst diabetics. 

[Goober]

2 minutes ago, Roadkill said:

And the haemorrhoids pillow to protect your shoulder from the recoil. 

Fortunately, not a problem. Left shoulder and I shoot off the right. Anyway, at 5 yard range you don't need to aim and can shoot from the hip. Yeehaw! 

[Bubba C]

9 minutes ago, Goober said:

Mine hurt like merry fuck when I had bursitis and getting a jumper on and off was a serious challenge, but the steroid injection sorted that. Now I just have limited movement but no pain at all, except for when I do the physio exercises of course. For me it's just going to be a case of waiting. It's quite common amongst diabetics. 

I’ve had steroids in the front, back and soon, the bicep. They only last about 6-8 weeks before I’m in agony again. 

[Goober]

1 minute ago, Bubba C said:

I’ve had steroids in the front, back and soon, the bicep. They only last about 6-8 weeks before I’m in agony again. 

I think the official diagnosis for your condition is 'totally fucked'. 

If you were a dog you'd be put down. 

Shoulder replacement surgery in your future I fear... 

[Bubba C]

17 minutes ago, Goober said:

I think the official diagnosis for your condition is 'totally fucked'. 

If you were a dog you'd be put down. 

Shoulder replacement surgery in your future I fear... 

I’m happy to go bionic. Robocunt. 

[Eric Cuntman]

23 minutes ago, Bubba C said:

I’m happy to go bionic. Robocunt. 

'Cyberdyne Systems Model T-101: Coal Mine Infiltration Unit'

[Goober]

I feel a 'fucked shoulder' special interest group developing. 

The one armed bandits? 

[Dyslexic cnut]

2 hours ago, Goober said:

I think the official diagnosis for your condition is 'totally fucked'. 

If you were a dog you'd be put down. 

Shoulder replacement surgery in your future I fear... 

A particularly horrible operation. My sister had one five years ago after tripping over them baggy culottes that birds wear, when putting the bins out at night, half-pissed. Her husband said it destroyed their domestic life as she couldn’t hold an iron for around five days.

[Frank]

42 minutes ago, Dyslexic cnut said:

A particularly horrible operation. My sister had one five years ago after tripping over them baggy culottes that birds wear, when putting the bins out at night, half-pissed. Her husband said it destroyed their domestic life as she couldn’t hold an iron for around five days.

Regardless of you current feelings towards me, I remain a fan. However, the above doesn't work.

Keep it simple.