Jake The Muss Posted April 22, 2022 Report Share Posted April 22, 2022 There cums a time when you get to a said age and have to except that you're not going to have the amount of rumping you once had, as an ageing cunt i can still fuck with the best but even i have to admit that i have to be satisfied with only three times a day and not the regular ten times a day that i was once used to, some of you are still virgins well in to your 40's+.. Jake's advice is to you virgins is get out of your piss stained bedsit, put your games consul away and get rid of your vintage wank sock and get amonst it before it's too late for you. Debate.. This is a serious topic, so NO derailing or you will be claw hammered to a pulp. Thanks in advance from the Muss Management. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Chap Raasclaat Posted April 22, 2022 Report Share Posted April 22, 2022 I realised around a year ago that when ones in his early forties those wild, coked up, pissed (and whatever else) sex marathons are not that easy to perform anymore. Truth is, once I've shot my load I kind of want the bird to fuck off to be honest, yet afterwards they're all over you like a rash, dripping juices everywhere. Too many lazy starfish types out there as well...let the lady put a shift in...she satisfied you and burns off a little blubber on the process, no wonder they're so many fat cows out there. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted April 22, 2022 Report Share Posted April 22, 2022 34 minutes ago, Jake The Muss said: There cums a time when you get to a said age and have to except that you're not going to have the amount of rumping you once had, as an ageing cunt i can still fuck with the best but even i have to admit that i have to be satisfied with only three times a day and not the regular ten times a day that i was once used to, some of you are still virgins well in to your 40's+.. Jake's advice is to you virgins is get out of your piss stained bedsit, put your games consul away and get rid of your vintage wank sock and get amonst it before it's too late for you. Debate.. This is a serious topic, so NO derailing or you will be claw hammered to a pulp. Thanks in advance from the Muss Management. What a steaming pile of fucking dog shit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jake The Muss Posted April 22, 2022 Author Report Share Posted April 22, 2022 14 minutes ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said: I realised around a year ago that when ones in his early forties those wild, coked up, pissed (and whatever else) sex marathons are not that easy to perform anymore. Truth is, once I've shot my load I kind of want the bird to fuck off to be honest, yet afterwards they're all over you like a rash, dripping juices everywhere. Too many lazy starfish types out there as well...let the lady put a shift in...she satisfied you and burns off a little blubber on the process, no wonder they're so many fat cows out there. That was too much information for the virgins. DC you're in our thoughts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jake The Muss Posted April 22, 2022 Author Report Share Posted April 22, 2022 Just now, Decimus said: What a steaming pile of fucking dog shit. What's up Duck ? Babs not wanting to sucky sucky you long time no more, or have you turned gay lord. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Parabolic Cunting Posted April 22, 2022 Report Share Posted April 22, 2022 52 minutes ago, Jake The Muss said: There cums a time when you get to a said age and have to except that you're not going to have the amount of rumping you once had, as an ageing cunt i can still fuck with the best but even i have to admit that i have to be satisfied with only three times a day and not the regular ten times a day that i was once used to, some of you are still virgins well in to your 40's+.. Jake's advice is to you virgins is get out of your piss stained bedsit, put your games consul away and get rid of your vintage wank sock and get amonst it before it's too late for you. Debate.. This is a serious topic, so NO derailing or you will be claw hammered to a pulp. Thanks in advance from the Muss Management. Exercise so your BPM is at 80% of capacity for at least 40 minutes a day. Work out your capacity by minusing your age from 220. Sex doesn't count, as most unfit heaps only reach 130 BPM at full pelt. I am 40, have a resting heart rate of 50-55 BPM. I smash those little sluts into strokes. No excuses for poor fucking as far as I'm concerned. Lazy cunts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eddie Posted April 22, 2022 Report Share Posted April 22, 2022 1 hour ago, Jake The Muss said: There cums a time when you get to a said age and have to except that you're not going to have the amount of rumping you once had, as an ageing cunt i can still fuck with the best but even i have to admit that i have to be satisfied with only three times a day and not the regular ten times a day that i was once used to, some of you are still virgins well in to your 40's+.. Jake's advice is to you virgins is get out of your piss stained bedsit, put your games consul away and get rid of your vintage wank sock and get amonst it before it's too late for you. Debate.. This is a serious topic, so NO derailing or you will be claw hammered to a pulp. Thanks in advance from the Muss Management. 3 times a day? Your arse hole must be in ribbons… 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted April 22, 2022 Report Share Posted April 22, 2022 (edited) 53 minutes ago, Eddie said: 3 times a day? Your arse hole must be in ribbons… Imagine if you will that your were the sort of degenerate who frequented gay sex parties. You go to pick up some keys from the bowl and end up with a plastic set belonging to a Fisher Price 'Toddler Tike' stroller. Next thing you know, you're in a room with Bend, he's wearing a rainbow baseball cap with a propeller on top, dribbling all over his Super Ted onesie. Feeling pity, you let him do you up the dirt box, only to find that his fliddy little T-Rex arms are incapable of performing a reach around. Edited April 22, 2022 by Decimus Fuck your shit nom, Bend, this is how it's done. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jake The Muss Posted April 22, 2022 Author Report Share Posted April 22, 2022 25 minutes ago, Decimus said: Imagine if you will that your were the sort of degenerate who frequented gay sex parties. You go to pick up some keys from the bowl and end up with a plastic set belonging to a Fisher Price 'Toddler Tike' stroller. Next thing you know, you're in a room with Bend, he's wearing a rainbow baseball cap with a propeller on top, dribbling all over his Super Ted onesie. Feeling pity, you let him do you up the dirt box, only to find that his fliddy little T-Rex arms are incapable of performing a reach around. There's nothing wrong with T-Rex, children of the revolution, hey ducks. Fuck off. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jake The Muss Posted April 22, 2022 Author Report Share Posted April 22, 2022 1 hour ago, Parabolic Cunting said: Exercise so your BPM is at 80% of capacity for at least 40 minutes a day. Work out your capacity by minusing your age from 220. Sex doesn't count, as most unfit heaps only reach 130 BPM at full pelt. I am 40, have a resting heart rate of 50-55 BPM. I smash those little sluts into strokes. No excuses for poor fucking as far as I'm concerned. Lazy cunts. I'm a lot older than you PC, when i was 40, i could fuck for 8 hours at a time, i'm still in good shape now but can only manage about 7 hours 59 minutes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jake The Muss Posted April 22, 2022 Author Report Share Posted April 22, 2022 1 hour ago, Eddie said: 3 times a day? Your arse hole must be in ribbons… How often do you manage it a day Ed, must be difficult, what with running a high end business ? Doing it with Fatty doesn't count. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cunty BigBollox Posted April 23, 2022 Report Share Posted April 23, 2022 13 hours ago, Jake The Muss said: There cums a time when you get to a said age and have to except that you're not going to have the amount of rumping you once had, as an ageing cunt i can still fuck with the best but even i have to admit that i have to be satisfied with only three times a day and not the regular ten times a day that i was once used to, some of you are still virgins well in to your 40's+.. Jake's advice is to you virgins is get out of your piss stained bedsit, put your games consul away and get rid of your vintage wank sock and get amonst it before it's too late for you. Debate.. This is a serious topic, so NO derailing or you will be claw hammered to a pulp. Thanks in advance from the Muss Management. I presume this prose is about your activities as a fudge packer as you haven't once mentioned female, girl, woman etc. You fucking poof, Punkape would be proud. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jake The Muss Posted April 23, 2022 Author Report Share Posted April 23, 2022 10 hours ago, Cunty BigBollox said: I presume this prose is about your activities as a fudge packer as you haven't once mentioned female, girl, woman etc. You fucking poof, Punkape would be proud. Sorry was that white noise as i couldn't understand a word of your strange dialect. Kindly fuck off...off my radar. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cunty BigBollox Posted April 24, 2022 Report Share Posted April 24, 2022 13 hours ago, Jake The Muss said: Sorry was that white noise as i couldn't understand a word of your strange dialect. Kindly fuck off...off my radar. Gaydar. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted April 24, 2022 Report Share Posted April 24, 2022 I'm not sure about the title of this nomination. If sex is in any way behind me, I'm not interested. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jake The Muss Posted April 24, 2022 Author Report Share Posted April 24, 2022 10 hours ago, Cunty BigBollox said: Gaydar. Cunty, it appears your pineal gland function is no more. Get some help. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProfB Posted April 24, 2022 Report Share Posted April 24, 2022 1 hour ago, Jake The Muss said: Cunty, it appears your pineal gland function is no more. Get some help. TRY HORSE RIDING Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
White Cunt Posted April 24, 2022 Report Share Posted April 24, 2022 On 22/04/2022 at 18:13, Jake The Muss said: There cums a time when you get to a said age and have to except that you're not going to have the amount of rumping you once had, as an ageing cunt i can still fuck with the best but even i have to admit that i have to be satisfied with only three times a day and not the regular ten times a day that i was once used to, some of you are still virgins well in to your 40's+.. Jake's advice is to you virgins is get out of your piss stained bedsit, put your games consul away and get rid of your vintage wank sock and get amonst it before it's too late for you. Debate.. This is a serious topic, so NO derailing or you will be claw hammered to a pulp. Thanks in advance from the Muss Management. I remember sex… 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Billy Posted April 24, 2022 Report Share Posted April 24, 2022 1 hour ago, White Cunt said: I remember sex… I made a conscious decision to give up having sex when I sold my massage parlour, the day after my cock fell off. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted April 24, 2022 Report Share Posted April 24, 2022 32 minutes ago, King Billy said: I made a conscious decision to give up having sex when I sold my massage parlour, the day after my cock fell off. Your cock's fallen off, and then you get shiny new toofs to attract the women you can no longer fuck. You've bolloxed this right up. If you'd stuck with the gummy look, you would at least pick up the ones who fancied a bit of 'hazard-free' cunnilingus. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
southerncunt Posted April 25, 2022 Report Share Posted April 25, 2022 On 23/04/2022 at 03:13, Jake The Muss said: There cums a time when you get to a said age and have to except that you're not going to have the amount of rumping you once had, as an ageing cunt i can still fuck with the best but even i have to admit that i have to be satisfied with only three times a day and not the regular ten times a day that i was once used to, some of you are still virgins well in to your 40's+.. Jake's advice is to you virgins is get out of your piss stained bedsit, put your games consul away and get rid of your vintage wank sock and get amonst it before it's too late for you. Debate.. This is a serious topic, so NO derailing or you will be claw hammered to a pulp. Thanks in advance from the Muss Management. So you’re saying you can only manage 3 wanks a day at your advanced age? That still places you well in front of the pack as the biggest wanker on here, by at least 2 wanks a day. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cunty BigBollox Posted April 25, 2022 Report Share Posted April 25, 2022 8 hours ago, King Billy said: I made a conscious decision to give up having sex when I sold my massage parlour, the day after my cock fell off. Have you got a false cock......to match your teeth?? And do you have to put it in a glass to soak overnight like you do with teeth? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jake The Muss Posted April 25, 2022 Author Report Share Posted April 25, 2022 10 hours ago, southerncunt said: So you’re saying you can only manage 3 wanks a day at your advanced age? That still places you well in front of the pack as the biggest wanker on here, by at least 2 wanks a day. We all have a talent for something, lighten up my southern dunce you will find a talent one day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted April 25, 2022 Report Share Posted April 25, 2022 2 hours ago, Jake The Muss said: We all have a talent for something Nunchucks, Bend? 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jake The Muss Posted April 25, 2022 Author Report Share Posted April 25, 2022 1 minute ago, Decimus said: Nunchucks, Bend? Very shallow ducks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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