Guest Tata Steely Dan Posted March 17, 2017 Report Share Posted March 17, 2017 Sat here on my sofa, contemplating making a fucking Map of Africa on the upholstery. I've contemplated micturating in the kitchen sink already, so don't even try and suggest it. Aye lad, that'll do it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted March 17, 2017 Report Share Posted March 17, 2017 Why not piss in the garden, you stupid prick? Or do you live in a tower block? Cunt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tata Steely Dan Posted March 17, 2017 Report Share Posted March 17, 2017 5 minutes ago, Ape said: Why not piss in the garden, you stupid prick? Or do you live in a tower block? Cunt. I'm not a barbarian. Do you frequently take a leak in your leeks? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted March 17, 2017 Report Share Posted March 17, 2017 3 minutes ago, Tata Steely Dan said: I'm not a barbarian. Do you frequently take a leak in your leeks? I'd use one of my other bathrooms. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tata Steely Dan Posted March 17, 2017 Report Share Posted March 17, 2017 Just now, Ape said: I'd use one of my other bathrooms. Fuck off, you're like a Poundland Punkape substitute. Try harder. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted March 17, 2017 Report Share Posted March 17, 2017 12 minutes ago, Tata Steely Dan said: Fuck off, you're like a Poundland Punkape substitute. Try harder. Believe it or not, some people do have more than one bathroom in their house. Really, it's nothing unusual these days. Eddie had six for fucks sake! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eddie Posted March 17, 2017 Report Share Posted March 17, 2017 4 minutes ago, Ape said: Believe it or not, some people do have more than one bathroom in their house. Really, it's nothing unusual these days. Eddie had six for fucks sake! 4 but only 3 have baths. Embarrassing i know. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted March 17, 2017 Report Share Posted March 17, 2017 4 minutes ago, Eddie said: 4 but only 3 have baths. Embarrassing i know. I'm sure TSD won't judge you, Edders. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eddie Posted March 17, 2017 Report Share Posted March 17, 2017 2 minutes ago, Ape said: I'm sure TSD won't judge you, Edders. India was a disaster ape, 4 days of fun 7 days of gastroenteritis. Never going back Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted March 17, 2017 Report Share Posted March 17, 2017 57 minutes ago, Ape said: Why not piss in the garden, you stupid prick? Or do you live in a tower block? Cunt. Off the balcony? 30 minutes ago, Ape said: Believe it or not, some people do have more than one bathroom in their house. Really, it's nothing unusual these days. Eddie had six for fucks sake! Did you mean more than one in their street? It is TSD after all.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted March 17, 2017 Report Share Posted March 17, 2017 32 minutes ago, Ape said: Believe it or not, some people do have more than one bathroom in their house. Really, it's nothing unusual these days. Eddie had six for fucks sake! He used five of them to dismember the bodies in. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted March 17, 2017 Report Share Posted March 17, 2017 17 minutes ago, Eddie said: India was a disaster ape, 4 days of fun 7 days of gastroenteritis. Never going back Sorry to hear that Edders. On reflection I'm not that sorry really, but you know, deep down, that I do care about you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted March 17, 2017 Report Share Posted March 17, 2017 1 hour ago, Ape said: I'd use one of my other bathrooms. You bloody liar, you would go for a quick run, hop over some cunts garden fence, have a piss AND a huge dump into the bargain, leaving some poor canine to take the rap for it. And don't bastard well deny it, you freely admitted to being a 'turdler' only a couple of weeks ago. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted March 18, 2017 Report Share Posted March 18, 2017 I'm French, so I am sure my opinion isn't required. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted March 18, 2017 Report Share Posted March 18, 2017 3 minutes ago, Witheredscrote said: I'm French, so I am sure my opinion isn't required. I knew a French girl named Joele when I was at college, she told me in France it was customary to shit in the shower and push it through the plug hole with your big toe. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gong Farmer Posted March 18, 2017 Report Share Posted March 18, 2017 I usually piss in a beer glass, I mean I do anyway. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted March 18, 2017 Report Share Posted March 18, 2017 5 minutes ago, Gong Farmer said: I usually piss in a beer glass, I mean I do anyway. Try pissing in a bottle and selling it, you should make a fortune, it's worked for Budweiser. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 18, 2017 Report Share Posted March 18, 2017 Father Stone had the right idea. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubby Pecker Posted March 18, 2017 Report Share Posted March 18, 2017 Piss in the garden, the main benefits of living in the middle of no where. And the quite, fresh air, wildlife, lack of chavs and not having to communicate with cunt neighbours and their rat kids. Haven't gone as far as a dump in the garden yet, out on a run however.... 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Posted March 18, 2017 Report Share Posted March 18, 2017 When you've got a prostate the size of a cabbage you quickly learn the art of pissing anywhere and not giving a fuck,probably at the top of the Asinelli tower in Bologna was one of the memorable ones.The idea of having to go down 300 plus steps having just got to the top was not an option so it was on the knees,knob out and aaaaaahhhhhhh,relief.Got a few odd looks but have needs must and all that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Alfie Noakes Posted March 18, 2017 Report Share Posted March 18, 2017 Go and piss on the offside wheel of a parked vehicle while holding up your right hand declaring loudly "in pain, in pain". Well that is what I told a mate once while waiting for a taxi after an evening on the lash. I think it may have to be your own vehicle as the next cabbie to arrive was not too pleased and called the old bill. A fist fight ensued and overnight accomodation was arranged by the police in their "hotel" for the major protagonists. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted March 18, 2017 Report Share Posted March 18, 2017 34 minutes ago, Neil said: When you've got a prostate the size of a cabbage What type of cabbage Neil, Savoy, Red, or Schumacher? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Posted March 18, 2017 Report Share Posted March 18, 2017 Like this one only bigger Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Alfie Noakes Posted March 18, 2017 Report Share Posted March 18, 2017 4 hours ago, Neil said: Like this one only bigger This is what my mri scan looked like Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted March 18, 2017 Report Share Posted March 18, 2017 20 minutes ago, Alfie Noakes said: This is what my mri scan looked like Are you sure that wasn't a brain scan? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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