King Billy Posted February 4 Report Share Posted February 4 9 hours ago, Roadkill said: Cunt's Army? @Ape™️ might be a bit handy, dropping grenades (improvised from bean cans obviously) from his toy helicopters, but @Eric Cuntman and @Cunty BigBollox would just grow weed farms or set up alcohol stills in the dugouts respectively. The entire front would be filled with stoned/blind conscripts using their rifles as improvised bongs or pawning their equipment for potato vodka. 12 hours ago, Penny Farthing said: a perfect citizens army I can see @Eric Cuntman, @Ape™️ and @Cunty BigBollox at the head of their own little squads. Rest assured that I’ll make sure the pretty young sex starved wives and girlfriends of all our brave heroes on the front line will have one of the finest ‘non drop’ Nordmann Spruce Christmas trees on Earth (paid for by the MOD but delivered personally by myself, no matter what time of the night). I’ve always had this inbuilt sense of patriotic duty, and tbh it’s just a shame there’s not a lot more like me prepared to stand up and be counted for the war effort. Obviously the fat, ugly and aged 35+ spouses (or as we military types call them ‘munters’) may experience some late (or far more likely non) delivery problems. I expect I’ll be having to make space on my regimental blazer for a VC sometime in early January but hey ho. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChildeHarold Posted February 4 Report Share Posted February 4 43 minutes ago, King Billy said: Rest assured that I’ll make sure the pretty young sex starved wives and girlfriends of all our brave heroes on the front line will have one of the finest ‘non drop’ Nordmann Spruce Christmas trees on Earth (paid for by the MOD but delivered personally by myself, no matter what time of the night). I’ve always had this inbuilt sense of patriotic duty, and tbh it’s just a shame there’s not a lot more like me prepared to stand up and be counted for the war effort. Obviously the fat, ugly and aged 35+ spouses (or as we military types call them ‘munters’) may experience some late (or far more likely non) delivery problems. I expect I’ll be having to make space on my regimental blazer for a VC sometime in early January but hey ho. That's what I call the spirit. It's cunts like you who built the Empire. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cunty BigBollox Posted February 5 Report Share Posted February 5 23 hours ago, Ape™️ said: It goes without saying that every bicycle you’ve ever owned was fitted with stabilisers, you drunken spastic. It also goes without saying that you graduated from the Raleigh Chipper to a cheap Chinese knock-off of the Raleigh Bomber................ called a Bumber. High on glue spastic. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penny Farthing Posted February 5 Report Share Posted February 5 23 hours ago, Ape™️ said: It goes without saying that every bicycle you’ve ever owned was fitted with stabilisers, you drunken spastic. Most of the cameras I use have got built in stabilisers @Ape™️ .. you can stick your Canon up your arse. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Billy Posted February 5 Report Share Posted February 5 1 hour ago, Penny Farthing said: Most of the cameras I use have got built in stabilisers @Ape™️ .. you can stick your Canon up your arse. Talking of cannons, how’s your ‘Big Bertha’? Fuck off. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Billy Posted February 5 Report Share Posted February 5 1 hour ago, Cunty BigBollox said: It also goes without saying that you graduated from the Raleigh Chipper to a cheap Chinese knock-off of the Raleigh Bomber................ called a Bumber. High on glue spastic. ‘Ahh! Waleigh Bummer? Velly wuvly bike. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted February 5 Report Share Posted February 5 2 hours ago, Cunty BigBollox said: It also goes without saying that you graduated from the Raleigh Chipper to a cheap Chinese knock-off of the Raleigh Bomber................ called a Bumber. High on glue spastic. I loved that era of Raleigh bikes. The weird and wonderful methods they came up with to make the Sturmey-Archer 3 speed hub gear look exciting. The Bomber just had a thumb lever I think?? The Grifter had the cool one. Twist grip on the handlebars. And the Chopper was cleverly designed to castrate anyone who braked too hard and slid off the sloping saddle. I bet you had a Raleigh Shopper with a basket for cider bottles. Lol lol. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PANZER MURPHY Posted February 6 Report Share Posted February 6 Tiz by gongz narseholes are led..lol UNREPENTANTFENIANBAZTURDPANZERMURPHYBABY Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cunty BigBollox Posted February 6 Report Share Posted February 6 17 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said: I loved that era of Raleigh bikes. The weird and wonderful methods they came up with to make the Sturmey-Archer 3 speed hub gear look exciting. The Bomber just had a thumb lever I think?? The Grifter had the cool one. Twist grip on the handlebars. And the Chopper was cleverly designed to castrate anyone who braked too hard and slid off the sloping saddle. I bet you had a Raleigh Shopper with a basket for cider bottles. Lol lol. I had a Chopper and then a Grifter. I couldn't bring myself to buy the Bomber with the bow curved cross bar and instead brought a Team Murray equivalent that had frame geometry like a Raleigh Burner but with 26" wheels. The Grifter I remember as being the heaviest, most cumbersome piece of shit that I've ever sat my arse on. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penny Farthing Posted February 6 Report Share Posted February 6 7 minutes ago, Cunty BigBollox said: I had a Chopper and then a Grifter. I couldn't bring myself to buy the Bomber with the bow curved cross bar and instead brought a Team Murray equivalent that had frame geometry like a Raleigh Burner but with 26" wheels. The Grifter I remember as being the heaviest, most cumbersome piece of shit that I've ever sat my arse on. Did you have a cb radio on the handlebars and halfbeed arial on the back? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted February 6 Report Share Posted February 6 10 minutes ago, Cunty BigBollox said: I had a Chopper and then a Grifter. I couldn't bring myself to buy the Bomber with the bow curved cross bar and instead brought a Team Murray equivalent that had frame geometry like a Raleigh Burner but with 26" wheels. The Grifter I remember as being the heaviest, most cumbersome piece of shit that I've ever sat my arse on. The Grifter was heavy. But it was a fuckload quicker than a BMX and almost indestructible. I used to jump mine off scaffold plank ramps, crash it into trees etc’. Never a bent front fork. I didn’t bother moving up to a Bomber either. Strangely enough the handlebars put me off as well. I got a 10 speed drop handlebar bike but I’d lost interest by then and it sat in the garage until I bought a car and got shot of it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cunty BigBollox Posted February 8 Report Share Posted February 8 On 06/02/2024 at 17:48, Penny Farthing said: Did you have a cb radio on the handlebars and halfbeed arial on the back? No, I had one of these. https://www.desertcart.co.il/products/49723286-super-siren-cycle-bike-horn-ambulance-police-amp-fire-engine 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cunty BigBollox Posted February 8 Report Share Posted February 8 On 06/02/2024 at 17:54, Eric Cuntman said: The Grifter was heavy. But it was a fuckload quicker than a BMX and almost indestructible. I used to jump mine off scaffold plank ramps, crash it into trees etc’. Never a bent front fork. I didn’t bother moving up to a Bomber either. Strangely enough the handlebars put me off as well. I got a 10 speed drop handlebar bike but I’d lost interest by then and it sat in the garage until I bought a car and got shot of it. Funny you mention scaffold and Grifter as the crossbar on mine looked as if it was made from an old scaffold pole. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted February 8 Report Share Posted February 8 7 hours ago, Cunty BigBollox said: Funny you mention scaffold and Grifter as the crossbar on mine looked as if it was made from an old scaffold pole. Fascinating. Twerp. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cunty BigBollox Posted February 8 Report Share Posted February 8 3 hours ago, Witheredscrote said: Fascinating. Twerp. I've found your bike, also in a colour to reflect how your lot acted in the world wars. https://minibikerscycles.co.uk/products/frog-52-20-tour-de-france-limited-edition-yellow Va te faire foutre, you cunt Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted February 9 Report Share Posted February 9 On 08/02/2024 at 09:07, Cunty BigBollox said: No, I had one of these. https://www.desertcart.co.il/products/49723286-super-siren-cycle-bike-horn-ambulance-police-amp-fire-engine So did I! I took it off after about a week because it was fucking stupid. Did you have one of those little speedometers that attached to the handlebars and was driven by a little nylon wheel running against the front tyre? Looking back, it was completely fucking useless unless it was intended for one size wheel only. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cunty BigBollox Posted February 10 Report Share Posted February 10 9 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said: So did I! I took it off after about a week because it was fucking stupid. Did you have one of those little speedometers that attached to the handlebars and was driven by a little nylon wheel running against the front tyre? Looking back, it was completely fucking useless unless it was intended for one size wheel only. No, I had a little mileometer that attached to the wheel spindle and a cogged wheel was turned by a peg fitted to the spokes. I had it calibrated every two weeks by a laboratory in Cambridge to ensure it remained more reliable then the electrics in a 1980's Alfa Romeo. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Billy Posted February 10 Report Share Posted February 10 13 hours ago, Cunty BigBollox said: I had it calibrated every two weeks by a laboratory in Cambridge I’ve heard about the ‘Bargain Booze Institute of Scientific Excellence’ in Cambridge Drew. Someone told me that they have a special hi tech machine on the counter when you walk in that can work out the exact value (down to the last penny) of any carrier bag or even trolley load of alcohol. Fucking technology Drew. It frightens me tbh. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cunty BigBollox Posted February 11 Report Share Posted February 11 7 hours ago, King Billy said: I’ve heard about the ‘Bargain Booze Institute of Scientific Excellence’ in Cambridge Drew. Someone told me that they have a special hi tech machine on the counter when you walk in that can work out the exact value (down to the last penny) of any carrier bag or even trolley load of alcohol. Fucking technology Drew. It frightens me tbh. I know what you mean, why the fuck should I care what the temperature is in my house while I'm in Wetherspoons eating my regular vegetarian breakfast, or why would I want a recording from a Ring doorbell of the spastic Evri delivery man depositing another parcel in the wheelie bin? I'm sure this is valuable information to the Chinese government but fuck knows why. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cunty BigBollox Posted February 11 Report Share Posted February 11 @Ape™️ is this you? https://www.facebook.com/share/r/fPCkp5h3w3Ccrp4S/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted February 11 Report Share Posted February 11 6 hours ago, Cunty BigBollox said: @Ape™️ is this you? https://www.facebook.com/share/r/fPCkp5h3w3Ccrp4S/ I’ve no idea, as to give an answer I’d first have to follow your little link, and I’m certainly not doing that. Why? Because you’re a fucking idiot. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cunty BigBollox Posted February 11 Report Share Posted February 11 1 hour ago, Ape™️ said: I’ve no idea, as to give an answer I’d first have to follow your little link, and I’m certainly not doing that. Why? Because you’re a fucking idiot. I'll take that as a yes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wolfie Posted February 11 Report Share Posted February 11 On 24/01/2024 at 19:34, entitled little cunt said: The Army is now woke with rainbows everywhere and fully inclusuve .I have to admit having some 6'4 marine running towards me with hands like shovels wearing lipstick , miniskirt, stockings and suspenders with a todger bouncing about would make me shit myself and run in the opposite direction pretty fucking quickly . This is one of the main reasons why I blocked Pen. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
and Posted February 11 Report Share Posted February 11 8 minutes ago, Wolfie said: This is one of the main reasons why I blocked Pen. How queer then, you've never blocked any of those sailors you meet in the park when you're taking your Poodle for walkies 🐩 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wolfie Posted February 11 Report Share Posted February 11 On 25/01/2024 at 23:05, King Billy said: Why would any young person risk their life in a phoney war which the filthy globalist traitors masquerading as Western world leaders are taking us towards? Why the fuck would any white, male, British patriot give a fuck when they’ve been denigrated, trodden on and blamed for every imagined grievance that the whining fucking layabout lefties could make up for decades? Let’s see how many of the ruling classes offspring would be sent to the fucking meat grinder on the front line? A big fat zero wouldn’t be far from the reality. The vermin in all the major political parties haven’t even tried to hide their contempt for the indigenous population of Britain for at least 30 years and they can go fuck themselves, every last fucking one of them. Imo we should fucking hang them all. Once upon a time (perhaps pre-Blair years) I'd have fought for this country. Not now. (But I would defend my home and loved ones to the death, of course, and relish taking out as many Chinks or Ruskies as possible.) Travel from beautiful, rural north Essex to the London side of the county and you'll realise we've already been invaded – and one of the main reasons why I'll no longer take up arms. I wouldn't be fighting for a green & pleasant metaphor for freedom and asylum but instead for a dominant force of Guardian-reading lazy lefties whose "That's racist! That's racist!" bawling for years has changed the face of the UK, ending careers along the way and preventing people with common sense from speaking freely. It's irreversibly too late, and I simply wouldn't put my life on the line for an Indian PM, Pakistani Mayor, and King who earned all of his medals without actually fighting in a war. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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