The Notting Hill Carnival

[Last Cunt Standing]

Corner tradition dictates that this coming weekend is the time for burying hatchets, holding hands and joining in a collective chorus of Kumbaya as we celebrate the Caribbean culture of London and the diversity miracle which continues to evolve across the UK. 

I’m only surprised that 48 hours before the August Bank Holiday begins, no one has yet ventured an opinion on what they are most looking forward to experiencing on the last public holiday before Summer turns to Autumn and it’s soon dark before Final Score. I can only assume everyone is distracted by the sudden death of Eddie, but it strikes me he’d like nothing more than a moment of collective cultural reflection. 

I’m off for a little blast of Bob Marley in the hot tub. 

Chin chin, brothers and sisters. Lively up yourselves. 

 

[Wolfie]

4 hours ago, Last Cunt Standing said:

Corner tradition dictates that this coming weekend is the time for burying hatchets, holding hands and joining in a collective chorus of Kumbaya as we celebrate the Caribbean culture of London and the diversity miracle which continues to evolve across the UK. 

I’m only surprised that 48 hours before the August Bank Holiday begins, no one has yet ventured an opinion on what they are most looking forward to experiencing on the last public holiday before Summer turns to Autumn and it’s soon dark before Final Score. I can only assume everyone is distracted by the sudden death of Eddie, but it strikes me he’d like nothing more than a moment of collective cultural reflection. 

I’m off for a little blast of Bob Marley in the hot tub. 

Chin chin, brothers and sisters. Lively up yourselves. 

 

Fuck off you downright boring cunt. Jesus fucking H.

[Last Cunt Standing]

4 hours ago, Wolfie said:

Fuck off you downright boring cunt. Jesus fucking H.

4 hours ago, Wolfie said:

Eddie's demise coincides with this weekend's NH Carnival, which is more than suspicious given his Afro-Caribbean roots. Commercial carwash tycoon by day, fried chicken street vendor at weekends.

It was brave, Ed, in an alcohol kind of way, I'll give you that. You'll have more time to walk your little pooch. If you did it on purpose to give yourself a breather for a while, then fair play. I guess we'll see you in a few months. Until such time...

 

As evidenced here, I’m not sure you can keep a coherent thought in your head for more than an hour these days you fucking windbag. But, that’s fine, there’s plenty of people here who will indulge you, sadly, whatever they might think privately. Though we seem to have ground to something of a truce, there’s still the occasional bullet over the wire, like the DMZ in Korea. I think you’re a Cunt, and no doubt you feel the same. 

I’m off on holiday at the weekend. Keep the place warm in my absence, dickhead. 

[Dyslexic cnut]

9 hours ago, Last Cunt Standing said:

As evidenced here, I’m not sure you can keep a coherent thought in your head for more than an hour these days you fucking windbag. But, that’s fine, there’s plenty of people here who will indulge you, sadly, whatever they might think privately. Though we seem to have ground to something of a truce, there’s still the occasional bullet over the wire, like the DMZ in Korea. I think you’re a Cunt, and no doubt you feel the same. 

I’m off on holiday at the weekend. Keep the place warm in my absence, dickhead. 

This has always been an enjoyable feud, but stop with the Roops vernacular ffs, Doc.

[Wolfie]

11 hours ago, Last Cunt Standing said:

As evidenced here, I’m not sure you can keep a coherent thought in your head for more than an hour these days you fucking windbag. But, that’s fine, there’s plenty of people here who will indulge you, sadly, whatever they might think privately. Though we seem to have ground to something of a truce, there’s still the occasional bullet over the wire, like the DMZ in Korea. I think you’re a Cunt, and no doubt you feel the same. 

I’m off on holiday at the weekend. Keep the place warm in my absence, dickhead. 

🎯

[Last Cunt Standing]

1 hour ago, Wolfie said:

🎯

Emojis now is it? Fuck me, whatever else I thought of you, I thought you were a man of letters. Silly me. 

I’m off to Bali to drink the place dry. Get fucked. 

[Cuntybaws]

2 hours ago, Last Cunt Standing said:

Emojis now is it? Fuck me, whatever else I thought of you, I thought you were a man of letters. Silly me. 

I’m off to Bali to drink the place dry. Get fucked. 

💩

[Wolfie]

20 hours ago, Last Cunt Standing said:

As evidenced here, I’m not sure you can keep a coherent thought in your head for more than an hour these days you fucking windbag. But, that’s fine, there’s plenty of people here who will indulge you, sadly, whatever they might think privately. Though we seem to have ground to something of a truce, there’s still the occasional bullet over the wire, like the DMZ in Korea. I think you’re a Cunt, and no doubt you feel the same. 

I’m off on holiday at the weekend. Keep the place warm in my absence, dickhead. 

You think I'm a cunt? Lol. From my perspective, surprisingly, no. You're probably a decent enough soul and a worthy commenter (despite your embarrassing ptl ratio) and this hole would undoubtedly be a lesser place without your thoughtful input, regardless of the snoozeworthy prose you often discharge upon the rest of us.

Whether you and I might get on in the real world, I'm not sure. But it's irrelevant because I enjoy successfully pissing you off right here, such is the GP-exuded egotism you've displayed like a peacock since I handed you your first kicking all those years ago. 

[ChildeHarold]

On 26/08/2022 at 21:27, Wolfie said:

This weekend sees London's primary street carnival take place, in which some of the generally nicer areas of our capital city become entrenched in a haze of fried chicken, big lips and BO.

As with recent Notting Hill Carnivals, the 'celebration' of Caribbean culture will result in approximately nine out of ten residents living along the intended route fleeing their homes in an attempt to escape the frightening and intimidating influx of crowds, and avoid the increased risk of being mugged, robbed or even stabbed.

Other than 2011, in which the event was cancelled because of looting en masse following the London riots, traditionally there are always hundreds of arrests (2016 holding the record at 450, surpassed in 2017 with 656 pre-emptive arrests in a venture by police to reduce the anticipated hostilities), as well as the usual racial tensions between ethnic minorites and rival gangs, typically resulting in street violence, illegal drug-dealings, stabbings, shootings, the occasional fatality, and food poisoning from uncooked chicken.

While it brings much to the local economy, this is somewhat offset by the huge police force equipped with full riot gear required to keep peace and order to prevent things from spiralling out of control. Not surprisingly, crime in other areas of London is heightened while the carnival takes place.

Ordinarily with the late August bank holiday, I'll be sitting in my back garden in the beautiful and much cleaner West Country, knocking back a few cold ciders, this year making a special effort to straighten the zigzags mistakenly inflicted upon my barren lawn, safe in the knowledge I no longer have to suffer or live anywhere near to this festering, dangerous shithole of an event.

3 hours ago, Wolfie said:

You think I'm a cunt? Lol. From my perspective, surprisingly, no. You're probably a decent enough soul and a worthy commenter (despite your embarrassing ptl ratio) and this hole would undoubtedly be a lesser place without your thoughtful input, regardless of the snoozeworthy boredom you often discharge upon the rest of us.

Whether you and I might get on in the real world, I'm not sure. But it's irrelevant because I enjoy successfully pissing you off right here, such is the GP-exuded egotism you've displayed like a peacock since I handed you your first kicking all those years ago. 

Settle down lads and shake hands etc etc 

[ChildeHarold]

What would the end of a British August and the school holidays be like without the traditional sound of steel drums, the scrumptious breakfast, lunch and dinner jerkie, and a false sense of calm and legality over the weekend culminating in an outbreak of mindless acts of violence and criminal behaviour on Monday night and the early hours of Tuesday morning? Ask Eddie baby. *

* "Don't call me Eddie baby" (Monty Python) 

 

 

 

[camberwell gypsy]

Is anyone running a book on stabbings and arrests? 

[Eric Cuntman]

9 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said:

Is anyone running a book on stabbings and arrests? 

I’ll have a tenner saying that the first stabbing will involve a black person. Surely I’ll get ridiculous odds because black people don’t commit crimes. 

[King Billy]

57 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said:

Is anyone running a book on stabbings and arrests? 

Donald Trump to be arrested again by midnight on Sunday? 5000/1 on  with all the High St. bookies. The smart money’s at 13/9 for the double if he stabs Joe Biden before the cops grab him though. Even money the electric chair before next years election.

[King Billy]

47 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

I’ll have a tenner saying that the first stabbing will involve a black person. Surely I’ll get ridiculous odds because black people don’t commit crimes. 

Of course they don’t, otherwise OJ Simpson and Bill Cosby would be in jail and George Floyd wouldn’t be in heaven with God. Donald Trump commits all the crimes and he’s orange.

[Eric Cuntman]

26 minutes ago, King Billy said:

Of course they don’t, otherwise OJ Simpson and Bill Cosby would be in jail and George Floyd wouldn’t be in heaven with God. Donald Trump commits all the crimes and he’s orange.

I could never understand O.J Simpson’s descent into crime. Even without the money from his excellent performances as Nordberg in the ‘Naked Gun’ films, he’s still to this day regarded as the greatest American football player of all time. The daft cunt could still be earning a grand an hour signing autographs for starstruck fat cunts. 

[King Billy]

23 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

I could never understand O.J Simpson’s descent into crime. Even without the money from his excellent performances as Nordberg in the ‘Naked Gun’ films, he’s still to this day regarded as the greatest American football player of all time. The daft cunt could still be earning a grand an hour signing autographs for starstruck fat cunts. 

I watched a lot of the OJ trial live on Sky all those years ago, and I was fucking delighted when he was acquitted Eric. Even though it was more likely that he did it than not, the absolute incompetence and blatant corruption of the LAPD,  planting physical evidence (the bloodstained glove on the driveway, and the DNA obtained from bloodstains in  the Bronco which the crooked filth claimed were missed initially, but then discovered the day after his blood sample was logged out from the evidence room and later found to have been tampered with. 
Guilty or not, the moment the cops are  proved to have fabricated evidence is enough to acquit imo. 

[Dyslexic cnut]

On 25/08/2023 at 12:19, Last Cunt Standing said:

Emojis now is it? Fuck me, whatever else I thought of you, I thought you were a man of letters. Silly me. 

I’m off to Bali to drink the place dry. Get fucked. 

How’s the wife, Doc? While you’ve been busy getting wanked off by Slopes for £3, the poor Abbo-ess has been left to forage for food. You’re a fucking medical disgrace.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-australia-66643241

[Witheredscrote]

18 minutes ago, Dick Fiddler said:

So what was the final tally for ghastly colonials stabbed? If it's double figures buck house will get new leather furniture.

What? Do you really think Chuck would like a black settee with pink scatter cushion. It would look like Diane Abbott with her legs akimbo.

[Neil]

How much did I win?

[Wolfie]

2 hours ago, Dick Fiddler said:

If the rumours are true, never mind the Abbotopotimus, ol' Chucky would like to turn David Lammy's arsehole into something resembling regurgitated lasagne.

Spunk, cocks and ravaged arseholes. You know nothing else, ol'Cocky, you one-dimensional cottaging cocksucker. I'll even wager you're on the shortlist for a pool party attendee alongside Stuart Lubbock, you fucking disgusting chutney-ferreting sex case.

[Neil]

1 hour ago, Dick Fiddler said:

None of this makes any sense you easily riled baby. Maybe you should visit Pistonheads for a bit, I suspect that forum will be more to your taste.

Did you mean 'Pissed On Heads'?

[camberwell gypsy]

Talking of thousands of hot sweaty blecks jumping up and down and dancing, here in Bulgaria, the only fucking English language TV channel is, ironically, France24. And it's been covering a military coup in Gabon where the army has had a gutful of the leader Ali Bongo and his family's 54 year hold on the country. Apparently this cunt and his brood has been screwing the country left right and centre and, allegedly, scammed the 2016 election where one area he had 95% voters voting for him with a 99.9% turn out. Now history has told us that when the army takes over, nothing good comes of it. 

It's a shame because I always loved watching Ali Bongo and his magic shows as a kid. 

[camberwell gypsy]

5 hours ago, Neil said:

How much did I win?

An accumulator! Nice one.