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Sir keir starmer

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7 minutes ago, ChildeHarold said:

More constructive wit from the extinct branch of human evolution. Swing out over a cess pit, drop in and stay there. 

And fucking pay Dr Drew some respect you amphetamine corker.  One day you will need him. 

@Eric Cuntman - care to review your 25% statement?

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Just now, Witheredscrote said:

Ape's having a shit.  Fuck off.

And even if Ape wasn’t having a shit  - fuck off.

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13 minutes ago, ChildeHarold said:

More constructive wit from the extinct branch of human evolution. Swing out over a cess pit, drop in and stay there. 

And fucking pay Dr Drew some respect you amphetamine corker.  One day you will need him. 

@Ape™️ I bet you're shitting yourself at this genius level of cunting wit

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15 hours ago, Stubby Pecker said:

@Ape™️ I bet you're shitting yourself at this genius level of cunting wit

Appeal to a higher authority called Ape doesn't reflect well on your ancestry Stubby. 

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17 hours ago, Witheredscrote said:

Ape's having a shit.  Fuck off.

Correction Ape is shit

 

Fuck off.

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1 hour ago, Arthur Dick said:

Correction Ape is shit

 

Fuck off.

Who are you?  Why didn't you go to school? Did you help burn down your Detention Centre?  Do you think Tommy Cooper was funny?

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2 hours ago, Witheredscrote said:

Who are you?  Why didn't you go to school? Did you help burn down your Detention Centre?  Do you think Tommy Cooper was funny?

Withers, leaving aside for a moment the indisputable fact that you’re a worthless faux Gallic cunt, I’d appreciate you’re advice concerning a dilemma I find myself in today. I assume you are aware that our glorious leader Bojo has unselfishly granted his unworthy subjects (us) the freedom to visit pubs and restaurants from today. As you will no doubt be aware, we have the finest cuisine and eating establishments in the world bar none. On hearing the glad tidings I immediately booked a table at the local jewel in the crown, the Toby Carvery for Her Majesty and myself tonight. However I’ve just received a text message from the establishment informing me that they had a break in last night and the burglars shit in the gravy urn, leaving them no option apparently, other than to throw most of it away. This has put me in two minds wether to go or wait till they make a new batch next week.What would you do?

Merci beacoup.

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44 minutes ago, King Billy said:

Withers, leaving aside for a moment the indisputable fact that you’re a worthless faux Gallic cunt, I’d appreciate you’re advice concerning a dilemma I find myself in today. I assume you are aware that our glorious leader Bojo has unselfishly granted his unworthy subjects (us) the freedom to visit pubs and restaurants from today. As you will no doubt be aware, we have the finest cuisine and eating establishments in the world bar none. On hearing the glad tidings I immediately booked a table at the local jewel in the crown, the Toby Carvery for Her Majesty and myself tonight. However I’ve just received a text message from the establishment informing me that they had a break in last night and the burglars shit in the gravy urn, leaving them no option apparently, other than to throw most of it away. This has put me in two minds wether to go or wait till they make a new batch next week.What would you do?

Merci beacoup.

Hello Your Majesty, two observations if you will permit.  It's no secret what Scrotie would do - exactly what he has been doing all throughout the lockdown (i.e. something heinous and goose-related).  I doubt he would go near a British Carvery given his penchant for all things francais, though it must be cringe-worthy to hear him shouting at the poor garcon in slow, loud English, insisting on a menu with pictures.  Even when he makes some sort of effort, the attempts at the lingo must raise everyone else's blood pressure - 'Je voooodray les pom freets'. Not so much as a 'si vous plait'!

However, and more importantly, surely as monarch you have the resources at your disposal to make these people up their game? I mean, it's not as though they are using goose-sweat or monkey juice.  I'd kindly suggest you give them a flea in their ear and directions to the nearest supermarket, on pain of death.

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1 hour ago, KingRollo said:

Hello Your Majesty, two observations if you will permit.  It's no secret what Scrotie would do - exactly what he has been doing all throughout the lockdown (i.e. something heinous and goose-related).  I doubt he would go near a British Carvery given his penchant for all things francais, though it must be cringe-worthy to hear him shouting at the poor garcon in slow, loud English, insisting on a menu with pictures.  Even when he makes some sort of effort, the attempts at the lingo must raise everyone else's blood pressure - 'Je voooodray les pom freets'. Not so much as a 'si vous plait'!

However, and more importantly, surely as monarch you have the resources at your disposal to make these people up their game? I mean, it's not as though they are using goose-sweat or monkey juice.  I'd kindly suggest you give them a flea in their ear and directions to the nearest supermarket, on pain of death.

Good evening Your Majesty. What a pleasure it is to have a fellow ‘blue blood’ to show some concern  for Her Maj and myself whilst we’re in the midst of this awful  predicament. The worst part of the fiasco is I have a BOGOF voucher which expires tonight. As you rightly say i need to grasp the corgi by the horns. I’ve ordered a few executions but the obvious question, as we speak, and still unanswered is “Why did nearly all of the gravy have to be thrown out?” Something stinks in my royal opinion.

Many thanks. 

Your regal superior.  KB

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47 minutes ago, King Billy said:

Good evening Your Majesty. What a pleasure it is to have a fellow ‘blue blood’ to show some concern  for Her Maj and myself whilst we’re in the midst of this awful  predicament. The worst part of the fiasco is I have a BOGOF voucher which expires tonight. As you rightly say i need to grasp the corgi by the horns. I’ve ordered a few executions but the obvious question, as we speak, and still unanswered is “Why did nearly all of the gravy have to be thrown out?” Something stinks in my royal opinion.

Many thanks. 

Your regal superior.  KB

Your Majesty, Queen Gwen and I will send you a gift token for Toby's, with our complements,  as recompense for your missed BOGOF opportunity - please don't be tempted to risk the gravy this evening, the lumps may not be congealed Bisto.

Your humble servant,

KR

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