ChildeHarold Posted September 5, 2020 Report Share Posted September 5, 2020 I quite obvious design flaw. Especially if free of charge. Hordes of dog walkers patrol the public footpaths in twos or groups creating a curious sense of motorway traffic in what should be a rural escape. There seems to be an orchestrated manfestation in the early evening when people marooned on these surrounding faceless bland new housing estates, sans community, sans features, sans facilities or shops, juggle their lives with their dog's shit cycle, and possibly with more than one pooch, their anuses bulging with dog shit, descend on these areas turning them into a travesty of the original design. As they never go more than 100 yards away from the car or down the paths, best thing is to start the walk somewhere else. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Weary&Disgusted Posted September 5, 2020 Report Share Posted September 5, 2020 3 minutes ago, ChildeHarold said: I quite obvious design flaw. Especially if free of charge. Hordes of dog walkers patrol the public footpaths in twos or groups creating a curious sense of motorway traffic in what should be a rural escape. There seems to be an orchestrated manfestation in the early evening when people marooned on these surrounding faceless bland new housing estates, sans community, sans features, sans facilities or shops, juggle their lives with their dog's shit cycle, and possibly with more than one pooch, their anuses bulging with dog shit, descend on these areas turning them into a travesty of the original design. As they never go more than 100 yards away from the car or down the paths, best thing is to start the walk somewhere else. Probably a good idea to go off the beaten track a ways so you can avoid the canines then. You might discover some neglected but charming area that you can keep going back to. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChildeHarold Posted September 5, 2020 Author Report Share Posted September 5, 2020 1 minute ago, Weary&Disgusted said: Probably a good idea to go off the beaten track a ways so you can avoid the canines then. You might discover some neglected but charming area that you can keep going back to. If Philip Larkin was alive now I reckon he would be signed up and having this conversation with you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted September 5, 2020 Report Share Posted September 5, 2020 8 minutes ago, ChildeHarold said: I quite obvious design flaw. Especially if free of charge. Hordes of dog walkers patrol the public footpaths in twos or groups creating a curious sense of motorway traffic in what should be a rural escape. There seems to be an orchestrated manfestation in the early evening when people marooned on these surrounding faceless bland new housing estates, sans community, sans features, sans facilities or shops, juggle their lives with their dog's shit cycle, and possibly with more than one pooch, their anuses bulging with dog shit, descend on these areas turning them into a travesty of the original design. As they never go more than 100 yards away from the car or down the paths, best thing is to start the walk somewhere else. What an unadulterated pile of shit. Step away from the keyboard and fucking end yourself. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Earl of Punkape Posted September 5, 2020 Report Share Posted September 5, 2020 10 minutes ago, ChildeHarold said: I quite obvious design flaw. Especially if free of charge. Hordes of dog walkers patrol the public footpaths in twos or groups creating a curious sense of motorway traffic in what should be a rural escape. There seems to be an orchestrated manfestation in the early evening when people marooned on these surrounding faceless bland new housing estates, sans community, sans features, sans facilities or shops, juggle their lives with their dog's shit cycle, and possibly with more than one pooch, their anuses bulging with dog shit, descend on these areas turning them into a travesty of the original design. As they never go more than 100 yards away from the car or down the paths, best thing is to start the walk somewhere else. You’re obviously an active member of the dogging community.... lol. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Earl of Punkape Posted September 5, 2020 Report Share Posted September 5, 2020 Just now, Ape™️ said: What an unadulterated pile of shit. Step away from the keyboard and fucking end yourself. Hello sweet pea... lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChildeHarold Posted September 5, 2020 Author Report Share Posted September 5, 2020 Just now, Earl of Punkape said: You’re obviously an active member of the dogging community.... lol. That's exactly what I thought when confronted by this spectacle. Clearly that's why they lock the gate 9.00 pm to 7.00 am evety night. It must have been going on. I wonder if it features in the Gay Guide to England and Wales? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChildeHarold Posted September 5, 2020 Author Report Share Posted September 5, 2020 4 minutes ago, Ape™️ said: What an unadulterated pile of shit. Step away from the keyboard and fucking end yourself. That's what I thought faced with co-ordinated dog shitting. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Weary&Disgusted Posted September 5, 2020 Report Share Posted September 5, 2020 8 minutes ago, ChildeHarold said: If Philip Larkin was alive now I reckon he would be signed up and having this conversation with you. 11 minutes ago, Weary&Disgusted said: Probably a good idea to go off the beaten track a ways so you can avoid the canines then. You might discover some neglected but charming area that you can keep going back to. Actually, you might encounter someone disposing of a corpse, or hanging themselves, so probably best not to wander too far. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted September 5, 2020 Report Share Posted September 5, 2020 41 minutes ago, ChildeHarold said: sans community, sans features, sans facilities Sans-culottes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penny Farthing Posted September 5, 2020 Report Share Posted September 5, 2020 26 minutes ago, ChildeHarold said: That's what I thought faced with co-ordinated dog shitting. I would kill the dog walkers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted September 5, 2020 Report Share Posted September 5, 2020 42 minutes ago, ChildeHarold said: If Philip Larkin was alive now I reckon he would be signed up and having this conversation with you. "Poetry is nobody’s business except the poet’s, and everybody else can fuck off." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted September 6, 2020 Report Share Posted September 6, 2020 11 hours ago, Ape™️ said: What an unadulterated pile of shit. Step away from the keyboard and fucking end yourself. I think it is a good nom, well written. If only he had included a jogger shitting behind a tree. Idiot. Fuck off. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted September 6, 2020 Report Share Posted September 6, 2020 26 minutes ago, Witheredscrote said: I think it is a good nom, well written. If only he had included a jogger shitting behind a tree. Idiot. Fuck off. Withersssssss. Sssssssslithering around again I sssssssssssee. Devious piece of shit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cunty BigBollox Posted September 6, 2020 Report Share Posted September 6, 2020 39 minutes ago, Witheredscrote said: I think it is a good nom, well written. If only he had included a jogger shitting behind a tree. Idiot. Fuck off. Or a boat load of unwashed browns running around after just disembarking their dinghy at the elation of getting away from that shit country full of garlic munching frogs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Williewhoopassjohnson Posted September 6, 2020 Report Share Posted September 6, 2020 The best places are usually kept to local bods anyway, catching them sharing them with out "outsiders" should qualify the offenders with a public kneecapping on the village green Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Billy Posted September 6, 2020 Report Share Posted September 6, 2020 9 minutes ago, Williewhoopassjohnson said: The best places are usually kept to local bods anyway, catching them sharing them with out "outsiders" should qualify the offenders with a public kneecapping on the village green I’ve gone all nostalgic reading this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChildeHarold Posted September 6, 2020 Author Report Share Posted September 6, 2020 2 hours ago, Witheredscrote said: I think it is a good nom, well written. If only he had included a jogger shitting behind a tree. Idiot. Fuck off. Well we all know what you get up to now. Got any recommendations for high powered binoculars? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChildeHarold Posted September 6, 2020 Author Report Share Posted September 6, 2020 13 hours ago, Dawn Chorus said: I would kill the dog walkers. Let the dogs free! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted September 6, 2020 Report Share Posted September 6, 2020 2 hours ago, Cunty BigBollox said: Or a boat load of unwashed browns running around after just disembarking their dinghy at the elation of getting away from that shit country full of garlic munching frogs. I think that their elation is probably more to do with reaching a country that splashes out vast amounts of British taxpayers money on them, and being helped by your soppy, powerless police, and Coastguards handing them blankets as they land. Anyway Droopy, thanks for reminding me that I should reorder another 500 inflatables from China. I'm running low. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Billy Posted September 6, 2020 Report Share Posted September 6, 2020 1 hour ago, Witheredscrote said: Anyway Droopy, thanks for reminding me that I should reorder another 500 inflatables from China. I'm running low. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted September 6, 2020 Report Share Posted September 6, 2020 2 hours ago, Witheredscrote said: I think that their elation is probably more to do with reaching a country that splashes out vast amounts of British taxpayers money on them, and being helped by your soppy, powerless police, and Coastguards handing them blankets as they land. Anyway Droopy, thanks for reminding me that I should reorder another 500 inflatables from China. I'm running low. Whens the next meeting with your Albanian business partner? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Williewhoopassjohnson Posted September 6, 2020 Report Share Posted September 6, 2020 4 hours ago, King Billy said: I’ve gone all nostalgic reading this. To be honest it gave me a warm glow as i wrote it, nothing like some casual tourist violence to brighten the day Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted September 6, 2020 Report Share Posted September 6, 2020 1 hour ago, King Billy said: Christ Bill, where did you get that. I've still got those shorts. Look good for my age, you must admit. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Billy Posted September 6, 2020 Report Share Posted September 6, 2020 1 hour ago, Witheredscrote said: Christ Bill, where did you get that. I've still got those shorts. Look good for my age, you must admit. I guess you’d look OK if you ignore the fact that it’s a normal size goose. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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