No signs of intelligent life

[Eric Cuntman]

5 hours ago, Williewhoopassjohnson said:

True, but mental birds can be very entertaining. Until they do something intense like burgle your house 

Or stab you. 

Been there. 

[Guest Williewhoopassjohnson]

17 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Or stab you. 

Been there. 

I had one burgle my house, never stabbed by one though, yet. Fucking hellfire you must have done a number to get stabbed 

[Stubby Pecker]

On 16/09/2020 at 11:01, nocti said:

Bit of advice to those who find themselves in the rather precarious, and frankly unlikely position of being offered a blowjob by Stacy Solomon. Keep her nice and warm. If her teeth start chattering, you're fucked.

Old Stace, being a Red Sea pedestrian, must be up their in the highest echelons of @ratcums wank bank?
 

Right next to Eva 

[Cuntybaws]

On 16/09/2020 at 11:01, nocti said:

Bit of advice to those who find themselves in the rather precarious, and frankly unlikely position of being offered a blowjob by Stacy Solomon. Keep her nice and warm. If her teeth start chattering, you're fucked.

Solomon is currently at number 5 on my infamous "Top Ten Horse-Faced Cunts" list, scoring a creditable 9.3 Dobbins. The Dobbin scale is predicated on a complex & proprietary algorithm that takes into account degree of horse-facedness and current celebrity status while factoring in just how much of a cunt they are in general, weighing these factors in a complex interplay of parameters at the cutting edge of statistical science. 

1. Sarah Jessica Parker
2. Jess Phillips
3. Celine Dion
4. Steph McGovern
5. Stacey Solomon
6. Princess Anne
7. Johanna Konta
8. Orla Guerin
9. Jacinda Ardern
10. Jerry Hall

[Last Cunt Standing]

9 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said:

Solomon is currently at number 5 on my infamous "Top Ten Horse-Faced Cunts" list, scoring a creditable 9.3 Dobbins. The Dobbin scale is predicated on a complex & proprietary algorithm that takes into account degree of horse-facedness and current celebrity status while factoring in just how much of a cunt they are in general, weighing these factors in a complex interplay of parameters at the cutting edge of statistical science. 

1. Sarah Jessica Parker
2. Jess Phillips
3. Celine Dion
4. Steph McGovern
5. Stacey Solomon
6. Princess Anne
7. Johanna Konta
8. Orla Guerin
9. Jacinda Ardern
10. Jerry Hall

Naturally I think 4 should be higher, and the omissions of Sarah Pascoe, Susan Tully and Vicki Pattinson and her oat-munching jaw are schoolboy errors, but as a starting point for debate it’s worth a doff of the Chapeau. 

[ChildeHarold]

The council-estate-slut-voice seems to be doing the rounds at the moment. As for Joe Swash, he works cheap. He could have been a contender. (joking) 

[Rev]

I wonder if the Swash cunt has ever got his wife's gammon hangers to froth like a bill poster's bucket...or even if the pigshit-thick puddle-drinking bastard would want to. I'm convinced she's that cottaging chut Rylan Whatever-his-fucking-name-is, who has a detachable Rolf Harris beard and occasionally tucks her cock between her legs.

How this pair of mouth-breathing arseholes with the collective IQ of a fucking Twix achieved celebrity status is fucking beyond me.

I want them dead.

[ChildeHarold]

19 hours ago, Rev said:

I wonder if the Swash cunt has ever got his wife's gammon hangers to froth like a bill poster's bucket...or even if the pigshit-thick puddle-drinking bastard would want to. I'm convinced she's that cottaging chut Rylan Whatever-his-fucking-name-is, who has a detachable Rolf Harris beard and occasionally tucks her cock between her legs.

How this pair of mouth-breathing arseholes with the collective IQ of a fucking Twix achieved celebrity status is fucking beyond me.

I want them dead.

Oven ready cunting. Johnson meet your successor! 

[camberwell gypsy]

On 19/09/2020 at 15:32, Cuntybaws said:

Solomon is currently at number 5 on my infamous "Top Ten Horse-Faced Cunts" list, scoring a creditable 9.3 Dobbins. The Dobbin scale is predicated on a complex & proprietary algorithm that takes into account degree of horse-facedness and current celebrity status while factoring in just how much of a cunt they are in general, weighing these factors in a complex interplay of parameters at the cutting edge of statistical science. 

1. Sarah Jessica Parker
2. Jess Phillips
3. Celine Dion
4. Steph McGovern
5. Stacey Solomon
6. Princess Anne
7. Johanna Konta
8. Orla Guerin
9. Jacinda Ardern
10. Jerry Hall

 

[ChildeHarold]

On 21/09/2020 at 19:23, camberwell gypsy said:

 

Actually you have to admire the lengths some talentless fucks will go to stay on TV. There should be a special award for that category. What helps them is they easily blend into the boring fucking woodwork of modern television. Even kids channels like Pop on Freeview or the Sky channels are dominated by dreadfully bland American shit with smarmie Yankee kids with predictably perfect teeth acting as a link between intensive commercial advertising for American toys all with the same shrill American accents. The common language of English is a fucking curse permitting coca cola imperialism. 

[ChildeHarold]

On 20/09/2020 at 23:41, Rev said:

I wonder if the Swash cunt has ever got his wife's gammon hangers to froth like a bill poster's bucket...or even if the pigshit-thick puddle-drinking bastard would want to. I'm convinced she's that cottaging chut Rylan Whatever-his-fucking-name-is, who has a detachable Rolf Harris beard and occasionally tucks her cock between her legs.

How this pair of mouth-breathing arseholes with the collective IQ of a fucking Twix achieved celebrity status is fucking beyond me.

I want them dead.

There you go, undoing all the credit points I was giving you in the last fell sentence. By that, you consigned yourself to sharing a special place in hell with Joe and Stacey. 

[Roadkill]

4 minutes ago, ChildeHarold said:

Actually you have to admire the lengths some talentless fucks will go to stay on TV. There should be a special award for that category. What helps them is they easily blend into the boring fucking woodwork of modern television. Even kids channels like Pop on Freeview or the Sky channels are dominated by dreadfully bland American shit with smarmie Yankee kids with predictably perfect teeth acting as a link between intensive commercial advertising for American toys all with the same shrill American accents. The common language of English is a fucking curse permitting coca cola imperialism. 

Just once, for this single fucking time, I actually find myself agreeing with you:

Fucking pure cancer - in televisual form. Fucking hell.

[King Billy]

On 22/09/2020 at 21:57, ChildeHarold said:

The common language of English is a fucking curse permitting coca cola imperialism

Do you speak it at all?

[ChildeHarold]

12 hours ago, King Billy said:

Do you speak it at all?

Can I get a sensible reply out of you? Are you in some sort of stand up comedy induced coma? 

[ChildeHarold]

On 22/09/2020 at 22:01, Roadkill said:

Just once, for this single fucking time, I actually find myself agreeing with you:

Fucking pure cancer - in televisual form. Fucking hell.

It's the electro-magnetic version of Creuzfeld Jacob Bovine Spongi..... eeeerrrhhhh... Gold Girls Golden Golden Girls, eighty year old cunts on the prowl 24 hrs a day, fucking funny? 

[camberwell gypsy]

On 22/09/2020 at 21:57, ChildeHarold said:

Actually you have to admire the lengths some talentless fucks will go to stay on TV. There should be a special award for that category. What helps them is they easily blend into the boring fucking woodwork of modern television. Even kids channels like Pop on Freeview or the Sky channels are dominated by dreadfully bland American shit with smarmie Yankee kids with predictably perfect teeth acting as a link between intensive commercial advertising for American toys all with the same shrill American accents. The common language of English is a fucking curse permitting coca cola imperialism. 

I hate the way yanks stereo type characters in kids tv. Examples are Saved by the Bell, where the complete dickhead is ugly and Jewish and where one of the other main characters is a blond epitome of aryanism. Same with one of the Power Rangers spinoffs, where the twat and butt of the jokes is some tubby cunt. 

[ChildeHarold]

2 hours ago, camberwell gypsy said:

I hate the way yanks stereo type characters in kids tv. Examples are Saved by the Bell, where the complete dickhead is ugly and Jewish and where one of the other main characters is a blond epitome of aryanism. Same with one of the Power Rangers spinoffs, where the twat and butt of the jokes is some tubby cunt. 

You're dead right and stems from this relentless American competitiveness which is raised to unhealthy and socially divisive levels by Yankee media and news. It is all about self comparisons with others. And that inevitably means comparing with two extremes, either much better than you, or much worse than you. A recipe for long term depression and over medication with opioids etc. All of which is rife in Yankee land. Either that pull out a gun and start blowing people away. Another peculiar Yankee trait. They see kids as a natural hook for this kind of shitty psychological strategy. 

[King Billy]

3 hours ago, camberwell gypsy said:

where the twat and butt of the jokes is some tubby cunt. 

Come on now Gypps. Laughing at fat cunts is the last bastion of white privilege and the dwindling male hierarchy. We know our bollocks have to go. That ship sailed ages ago, but can’t we just hang onto this one last little pleasure,even just as a reminder that we were once the masters of all we surveyed?

[Eric Cuntman]

On 19/09/2020 at 15:32, Cuntybaws said:

Solomon is currently at number 5 on my infamous "Top Ten Horse-Faced Cunts" list, scoring a creditable 9.3 Dobbins. The Dobbin scale is predicated on a complex & proprietary algorithm that takes into account degree of horse-facedness and current celebrity status while factoring in just how much of a cunt they are in general, weighing these factors in a complex interplay of parameters at the cutting edge of statistical science. 

1. Sarah Jessica Parker
2. Jess Phillips
3. Celine Dion
4. Steph McGovern
5. Stacey Solomon
6. Princess Anne
7. Johanna Konta
8. Orla Guerin
9. Jacinda Ardern
10. Jerry Hall

I've noticed that Canadian female 'comedian' Katherine Ryan is indeed, a horse-faced cunt. This places me in a conundrum, because whilst acknowledging her horse-facedness, I also would like to fuck the arse off her.

[Stubby Pecker]

3 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said:

I've noticed that Canadian female 'comedian' Katherine Ryan is indeed, a horse-faced cunt. This places me in a conundrum, because whilst acknowledging her horse-facedness, I also would like to fuck the arse off her.

I’d only fuck her if I’d have cut her head off first 

 

[Eric Cuntman]

Just now, JohnnySaucePants said:

Would you muff dive that hideous translucent skinned, strine speaking, ginger bag, ex Aussie prime minister Julia Gillard though.  

 

Dunno. Hang on, I'll google her.

[Eric Cuntman]

2 minutes ago, JohnnySaucePants said:

Would you muff dive that hideous translucent skinned, strine speaking, ginger bag, ex Aussie prime minister Julia Gillard though.  

 

 

1 minute ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Dunno. Hang on, I'll google her.

Yeah. With a dim light and a squint, she looks a bit like Jodie Foster. 

[Eric Cuntman]

4 minutes ago, JohnnySaucePants said:

 You might change your mind if you hear it speak.

Besides she's a ginger, but maybe if she kept her gob shut.

Kind of woman @southerncunt drags up from his mental wank bank, when his Abbo missus has gone walkabout for a few days in search of bush tucker. 

But each to their own, 

@southerncunt would be top of most members list of other cunts on here that they'd go drinking with. He's sound as fuck. 

You really can't pick enemies well Johnny. 

[Decimus]

6 hours ago, JohnnySaucePants said:

Now THAT"S fucking funny.

So when did you last have a night out on the bottle with your "friend"  southerncunt. Errrm, like never, and eerrm like never will.🙂

I suspect strongly, that your one of those saps with 2873 face book "friends", and only know three of them, plus even they dont like you very much. OOOhh friend, friend, friend, ( what was the name of that comedy?)

I've actually been for several drinks with another member who shall remain nameless. 

I'd like to take you for a pint, Johnny, of fucking bleach.

Idiot.

[Last Cunt Standing]

7 hours ago, JohnnySaucePants said:

 

Just what the fuck did Jagger see in Jerry Hall is what i'd like to know. She really is a truly awful looking horse faced hag.  Although she does seem to have become more massively  gummy as she's aged.  Either that or  she's got a new set of implant screw fixed teeth. Probably so as she wont spit them out and leave them on the end of Rupert  Murdochs shrivelled cock.  Looks like a match made in heaven, He's a wealthy spin doctoring wrinkly old bastard with half a dozen chins, and she's obviously a simple gold digging diva. Both of them complete cunts.

Oh dear me. Not content with ripping half The Corner and Australia’s first Woman PM, you’re now turning your fire on The Dirty Digger and his Texan wife. Tell me Jonny, is there anyone North of The Tasman you actually like? This scattergun approach might, to less sympathetic observers, make you look like a total arsehole.