Stubby Pecker Posted October 24, 2019 Report Share Posted October 24, 2019 I know the cunting of fat bastards has been done to death but the relatively new phenomenon of great lard arse's barely out of school brings me to despair. Enjoying a couple of pints last night with the old man, the "bar maids" and their 4 or 5 hanger on friends were a sight to make the beer go off as it was being poured. All in their early 20's and sporting great wide arses and big round belly's that wouldn't look out of place under Shirley Crabtree's spandex. One can forgive those who've had children for going to seed somewhat but topping the scales at a good 16st when you've just finished your GCSE's is unforgivable. Perhaps a little less time gawping into some smart phone and believing the propaganda that having a great wobbly arse, as endorsed by a fried chicken scoffing slag rapper, and a bit more effort to get some exercise might solve the inevitable mental health and body confidence issues these pig shit thick superficial slags have to live with. I genuinely feel sorry for today's young lads faced with the prospect of only having these pre-tuskers to fuck. With any luck no self respecting cunt will go near them and the next generation of mini jabbas won't be shat out. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penny Farthing Posted October 24, 2019 Report Share Posted October 24, 2019 Bullshit .. never happened. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PANZER MURPHY Posted October 24, 2019 Report Share Posted October 24, 2019 Lot to be said for the burka ..maybe the duskies were onto somthin Panzermurphybaby Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Posted October 24, 2019 Report Share Posted October 24, 2019 I dont mind the fat ones,they cant run as fast 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubby Pecker Posted October 24, 2019 Author Report Share Posted October 24, 2019 3 hours ago, Neil said: I dont mind the fat ones,they cant run as fast Can't be good for your back though, hauling them into your van? At least when they're down it's hard for them to get up again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
White Cunt Posted October 24, 2019 Report Share Posted October 24, 2019 5 hours ago, Stubby Pecker said: I know the cunting of fat bastards has been done to death but the relatively new phenomenon of great lard arse's barely out of school brings me to despair. Enjoying a couple of pints last night with the old man, the "bar maids" and their 4 or 5 hanger on friends were a sight to make the beer go off as it was being poured. All in their early 20's and sporting great wide arses and big round belly's that wouldn't look out of place under Shirley Crabtree's spandex. One can forgive those who've had children for going to seed somewhat but topping the scales at a good 16st when you've just finished your GCSE's is unforgivable. Perhaps a little less time gawping into some smart phone and believing the propaganda that having a great wobbly arse, as endorsed by a fried chicken scoffing slag rapper, and a bit more effort to get some exercise might solve the inevitable mental health and body confidence issues these pig shit thick superficial slags have to live with. I genuinely feel sorry for today's young lads faced with the prospect of only having these pre-tuskers to fuck. With any luck no self respecting cunt will go near them and the next generation of mini jabbas won't be shat out. At the opposite end of the scale (in shrinking numbers) you get the preying mantis Victoria Beckam juniors, equally fucking disgusting. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penny Farthing Posted October 24, 2019 Report Share Posted October 24, 2019 3 hours ago, Neil said: I dont mind the fat ones,they cant run as fast Don't the thin ones slip through the cracks? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Dustyballs Posted October 24, 2019 Report Share Posted October 24, 2019 This made me laugh. This seems to be getting so much worse its the same in my local, use to have half decent eye candy but now... well puts you right off your pint with a fucking she-hulk behind the bar. Then the fatties are moaning they look like a pig yet don't stop stuffing their piggy faces. When you get to the point of the lads trying to get a root they are faced with rolling the flump in some flour just to find the wet spot, this has gone too far. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted October 24, 2019 Report Share Posted October 24, 2019 1 hour ago, Stubby Pecker said: Can't be good for your back though, hauling them into your van? At least when they're down it's hard for them to get up again. He usually pretends to have a broken arm, and asks them for help getting a sofa into the van. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubby Pecker Posted October 24, 2019 Author Report Share Posted October 24, 2019 3 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said: He usually pretends to have a broken arm, and asks them for help getting a sofa into the van. "It rubs the lotion on its skin, it does whatever its told" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nocti Posted October 24, 2019 Report Share Posted October 24, 2019 The bar staff example is a good one. There's one that works in a pub local to me that, to her credit, has quite a pretty face, but a body that orion's belt would be too tight for. I blame the Kardashians for all this bollocks. I could just about put up with fat-shaming being frowned upon, but being a ham-planet is nothing to be celebrated. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted October 24, 2019 Report Share Posted October 24, 2019 7 hours ago, Neil said: I dont mind the fat ones,they cant run as fast Awful strain on the Bedford Rascal's suspension though, eh? Or have you invested in a long base van? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penny Farthing Posted October 24, 2019 Report Share Posted October 24, 2019 2 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: Awful strain on the Bedford Rascal's suspension though, eh? Or have you invested in a long base van? He has fitted it with fat tyres. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Billy Posted October 26, 2019 Report Share Posted October 26, 2019 On 24/10/2019 at 15:22, Dustyballs said: This made me laugh. This seems to be getting so much worse its the same in my local, use to have half decent eye candy but now... well puts you right off your pint with a fucking she-hulk behind the bar. Then the fatties are moaning they look like a pig yet don't stop stuffing their piggy faces. When you get to the point of the lads trying to get a root they are faced with rolling the flump in some flour just to find the wet spot, this has gone too far. Why do women wear make up and perfume? Cos they’re ugly and they fucking stink. lol 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Billy Posted October 26, 2019 Report Share Posted October 26, 2019 On 24/10/2019 at 14:28, Stubby Pecker said: Can't be good for your back though, hauling them into your van? At least when they're down it's hard for them to get up again. How do you pull a fat bird? Piece of cake. lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest judgetwi Posted October 27, 2019 Report Share Posted October 27, 2019 On 24/10/2019 at 09:11, Stubby Pecker said: I know the cunting of fat bastards has been done to death Yeah. Good one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Last Cunt Standing Posted October 27, 2019 Report Share Posted October 27, 2019 4 hours ago, judgetwi said: Yeah. Good one. Don’t be so sensitive Judith, you should develop a thick skin. Then you’d be in proportion. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Erroreptile404 Posted October 27, 2019 Report Share Posted October 27, 2019 11 hours ago, Last Cunt Standing said: Don’t be so sensitive Judith, you should develop a thick skin. Then you’d be in proportion. Go and suck a koala dick you cunt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted October 27, 2019 Report Share Posted October 27, 2019 3 minutes ago, Erroreptile404 said: Go and suck a koala dick you cunt. Koala piss smells of cough sweets. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Earl of Punkape Posted October 27, 2019 Report Share Posted October 27, 2019 15 hours ago, judgetwi said: Yeah. Good one. It’s “Yes” not “Yeah”. You ill educated peasant. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Erroreptile404 Posted October 27, 2019 Report Share Posted October 27, 2019 3 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said: Koala piss smells of cough sweets. Either way i want him to do a Steve Irwin, stingray barb through the heart, quick and painless for anyone watching but not for him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Major Cunt Posted October 27, 2019 Report Share Posted October 27, 2019 1 hour ago, Erroreptile404 said: Either way i want him to do a Steve Irwin, stingray barb through the heart, quick and painless for anyone watching but not for him. We all want you to put your Xbox controller down and attempt to loose your virginity, but that ain't sounding like a possibility either. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubby Pecker Posted October 27, 2019 Author Report Share Posted October 27, 2019 17 hours ago, judgetwi said: Yeah. Good one. Get back to your kebabs you miserable fat shite. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penny Farthing Posted October 27, 2019 Report Share Posted October 27, 2019 24 minutes ago, Stubby Pecker said: Get back to your kebabs you miserable fat shite. You ok Stubby? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Erroreptile404 Posted October 27, 2019 Report Share Posted October 27, 2019 2 hours ago, Major Cunt said: We all want you to put your Xbox controller down and attempt to loose your virginity, but that ain't sounding like a possibility either. How does one "loose" their virginity you thick divvy twat? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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