Jiggerycock Posted October 1, 2018 Report Share Posted October 1, 2018 We are busy people, are we not? Our lives seemingly one great rush, meeting ourselves coming back and generally in a state of perpetually trying to 'catch up' and 'make time'. So it makes for a fist-chewingly seething rage when you're in the middle of the latest mad dash to get wherever you need to be, yesterday to be stuck behind a Range Rover / Tesla / BMW / Jag driven by some decrepid old fucker, fat on their share flotations and property portfolios, at a speed your garden tortoise might find a bit leisurely. These cunts are omnipresent, pootling along at half the permitted speed limit, peering over the steering wheel like Mr Chad, whilst the array of shiny LED's on their dashboard blink out an SOS message along the lines of 'For fuck sake, you're sitting in the height of precision automotive engineering - GET A FUCKING MOVE ON you coffin-dodging old spakker!' ....as indeed do the drivers of the line of cars behind them Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penny Farthing Posted October 1, 2018 Report Share Posted October 1, 2018 3 minutes ago, Jiggerycock said: We are busy people, are we not? Our lives seemingly one great rush, meeting ourselves coming back and generally in a state of perpetually trying to 'catch up' and 'make time'. So it makes for a fist-chewingly seething rage when you're in the middle of the latest mad dash to get wherever you need to be, yesterday to be stuck behind a Range Rover / Tesla / BMW / Jag driven by some decrepid old fucker, fat on their share flotations and property portfolios, at a speed your garden tortoise might find a bit leisurely. These cunts are omnipresent, pootling along at half the permitted speed limit, peering over the steering wheel like Mr Chad, whilst the array of shiny LED's on their dashboard blink out an SOS message along the lines of 'For fuck sake, you're sitting in the height of precision automotive engineering - GET A FUCKING MOVE ON you coffin-dodging old spakker!' ....as indeed do the drivers of the line of cars behind them Life's a dawdle. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Earl of Punkape Posted October 1, 2018 Report Share Posted October 1, 2018 1 hour ago, Jiggerycock said: We are busy people, are we not? Our lives seemingly one great rush, meeting ourselves coming back and generally in a state of perpetually trying to 'catch up' and 'make time'. So it makes for a fist-chewingly seething rage when you're in the middle of the latest mad dash to get wherever you need to be, yesterday to be stuck behind a Range Rover / Tesla / BMW / Jag driven by some decrepid old fucker, fat on their share flotations and property portfolios, at a speed your garden tortoise might find a bit leisurely. These cunts are omnipresent, pootling along at half the permitted speed limit, peering over the steering wheel like Mr Chad, whilst the array of shiny LED's on their dashboard blink out an SOS message along the lines of 'For fuck sake, you're sitting in the height of precision automotive engineering - GET A FUCKING MOVE ON you coffin-dodging old spakker!' ....as indeed do the drivers of the line of cars behind them What sort of disability vehicle do you drive yourself? Did MENCAP buy it for you? lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubby Pecker Posted October 1, 2018 Report Share Posted October 1, 2018 1 hour ago, Jiggerycock said: We are busy people, are we not? Our lives seemingly one great rush, meeting ourselves coming back and generally in a state of perpetually trying to 'catch up' and 'make time'. So it makes for a fist-chewingly seething rage when you're in the middle of the latest mad dash to get wherever you need to be, yesterday to be stuck behind a Range Rover / Tesla / BMW / Jag driven by some decrepid old fucker, fat on their share flotations and property portfolios, at a speed your garden tortoise might find a bit leisurely. These cunts are omnipresent, pootling along at half the permitted speed limit, peering over the steering wheel like Mr Chad, whilst the array of shiny LED's on their dashboard blink out an SOS message along the lines of 'For fuck sake, you're sitting in the height of precision automotive engineering - GET A FUCKING MOVE ON you coffin-dodging old spakker!' ....as indeed do the drivers of the line of cars behind them I got stuck behind one of these motherfuckers 'tuther day, old jiggles. Rushing for an appointment to get fucked over by the mortgage cunts, I was late following some doddering old fucker in a new jag. Winding county roads with nowhere to overtake and 45 was the perfect speed, so perfect he maintained it through all the 40 and 30 zones. What a cunt Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
and Posted October 1, 2018 Report Share Posted October 1, 2018 But it's ok for Beckers (you do call him Beckers, don't you?) to drive like a cunt and get away with it, on a technicality. Stop whining, better safe than sorry! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Erroreptile404 Posted October 1, 2018 Report Share Posted October 1, 2018 I was driving through cheshire the other day and got stuck behind some gay cunt driving one of these and on the way to presumably a golf club... llol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
White Cunt Posted October 1, 2018 Report Share Posted October 1, 2018 6 hours ago, Jiggerycock said: We are busy people, are we not? Our lives seemingly one great rush, meeting ourselves coming back and generally in a state of perpetually trying to 'catch up' and 'make time'. So it makes for a fist-chewingly seething rage when you're in the middle of the latest mad dash to get wherever you need to be, yesterday to be stuck behind a Range Rover / Tesla / BMW / Jag driven by some decrepid old fucker, fat on their share flotations and property portfolios, at a speed your garden tortoise might find a bit leisurely. These cunts are omnipresent, pootling along at half the permitted speed limit, peering over the steering wheel like Mr Chad, whilst the array of shiny LED's on their dashboard blink out an SOS message along the lines of 'For fuck sake, you're sitting in the height of precision automotive engineering - GET A FUCKING MOVE ON you coffin-dodging old spakker!' ....as indeed do the drivers of the line of cars behind them Six months of driving in Libya would do them a world of good. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wizardsleeve Posted October 1, 2018 Report Share Posted October 1, 2018 8 hours ago, Lord Punkape said: What sort of disability vehicle do you drive yourself? Did MENCAP buy it for you? lol. You have been caught on camera in your vehicle Punky. You MUST take personal security more seriously, as now you are in the public eye. We would all hate to see something awful happen to you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Bill Stickers Posted October 1, 2018 Report Share Posted October 1, 2018 10 hours ago, Jiggerycock said: We are busy people, are we not? Our lives seemingly one great rush, meeting ourselves coming back and generally in a state of perpetually trying to 'catch up' and 'make time'. So it makes for a fist-chewingly seething rage when you're in the middle of the latest mad dash to get wherever you need to be, yesterday to be stuck behind a Range Rover / Tesla / BMW / Jag driven by some decrepid old fucker, fat on their share flotations and property portfolios, at a speed your garden tortoise might find a bit leisurely. These cunts are omnipresent, pootling along at half the permitted speed limit, peering over the steering wheel like Mr Chad, whilst the array of shiny LED's on their dashboard blink out an SOS message along the lines of 'For fuck sake, you're sitting in the height of precision automotive engineering - GET A FUCKING MOVE ON you coffin-dodging old spakker!' ....as indeed do the drivers of the line of cars behind them @Monumental cunt, please put forward an argument in defence of your people. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Beast Posted October 1, 2018 Report Share Posted October 1, 2018 10 hours ago, Jiggerycock said: We are busy people, are we not? Our lives seemingly one great rush, meeting ourselves coming back and generally in a state of perpetually trying to 'catch up' and 'make time'. So it makes for a fist-chewingly seething rage when you're in the middle of the latest mad dash to get wherever you need to be, yesterday to be stuck behind a Range Rover / Tesla / BMW / Jag driven by some decrepid old fucker, fat on their share flotations and property portfolios, at a speed your garden tortoise might find a bit leisurely. These cunts are omnipresent, pootling along at half the permitted speed limit, peering over the steering wheel like Mr Chad, whilst the array of shiny LED's on their dashboard blink out an SOS message along the lines of 'For fuck sake, you're sitting in the height of precision automotive engineering - GET A FUCKING MOVE ON you coffin-dodging old spakker!' ....as indeed do the drivers of the line of cars behind them There must be something satisfying about being older in years, driving a powerful car at a snail's pace, pissing every cunt off in the queue behind you. Especially if the cunt(s) have wide wheels, an exhaust the bore of the Blackwall tunnel in size and all that thump, thump awful music blearing out. Make the bastards wait. Too many cunts in a rush to go nowhere important. I have been driving like a senile cunt for almost 30 years. When wankers trundle along inches away from my rear bumper I play the total arse. I will indicate right to turn in, then when almost at a halt I will change my mind, raise my hand to apologise and carry on plodding along. I'll give way to every cunt trying to pull out from a side turning too if the bastard behind persists in not keeping their distance. Then when they overtake, probably giving me the stare and gesticulating at me, I act oblivious to it, leaning forward, purposefully pulling a spastic face, clinging to the steering wheel for dear life. Fuck 'em, let 'em have it. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted October 1, 2018 Report Share Posted October 1, 2018 9 hours ago, Lord Punkape said: What sort of disability vehicle do you drive yourself? Did MENCAP buy it for you? lol. Lol. Lol. Lol. Lol. Fucking stupid wanker. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubby Pecker Posted October 1, 2018 Report Share Posted October 1, 2018 1 hour ago, The Beast said: There must be something satisfying about being older in years, driving a powerful car at a snail's pace, pissing every cunt off in the queue behind you. Especially if the cunt(s) have wide wheels, an exhaust the bore of the Blackwall tunnel in size and all that thump, thump awful music blearing out. Make the bastards wait. Too many cunts in a rush to go nowhere important. I have been driving like a senile cunt for almost 30 years. When wankers trundle along inches away from my rear bumper I play the total arse. I will indicate right to turn in, then when almost at a halt I will change my mind, raise my hand to apologise and carry on plodding along. I'll give way to every cunt trying to pull out from a side turning too if the bastard behind persists in not keeping their distance. Then when they overtake, probably giving me the stare and gesticulating at me, I act oblivious to it, leaning forward, purposefully pulling a spastic face, clinging to the steering wheel for dear life. Fuck 'em, let 'em have it. "Purposefully pulling a spastic face"? Try looking in the mirror occasionally and you'll see the same spazzer looking back Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted October 1, 2018 Report Share Posted October 1, 2018 10 minutes ago, Stubby Pecker said: "Purposefully pulling a spastic face"? Try looking in the mirror occasionally and you'll see the same spazzer looking back He likes to park, in handicapped spaces, while handicapped people, make handicapped faces. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest N/A Posted October 1, 2018 Report Share Posted October 1, 2018 3 hours ago, William T.D. Stickers said: @Monumental cunt, please put forward an argument in defence of your people. Not my people old boy. As iam from Manchester I drive like I just stole the fucker. As is actually the case with most of my cars, they get stolen. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Beast Posted October 1, 2018 Report Share Posted October 1, 2018 1 hour ago, Stubby Pecker said: "Purposefully pulling a spastic face"? Try looking in the mirror occasionally and you'll see the same spazzer looking back I tip my stupid fucking hat to your empirical knowledge on such matters. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nocti Posted October 1, 2018 Report Share Posted October 1, 2018 I've got to agree with Proper on this one. 90% of the time spent in my car is either on the way to work, or back home to the Wife, and believe me I'm in no fucking rush to see either. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted October 2, 2018 Report Share Posted October 2, 2018 2 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said: He likes to park, in handicapped spaces, while handicapped people, make handicapped faces. Beautiful. One of the true greats of poetry was Christina Rossetti. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Earl of Punkape Posted October 2, 2018 Report Share Posted October 2, 2018 10 hours ago, nocti said: I've got to agree with Proper on this one. 90% of the time spent in my car is either on the way to work, or back home to the Wife, and believe me I'm in no fucking rush to see either. Do you have any photos of your wife to post on here......? Admin could agree to a “Cuntscorner wifes” section. lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted October 2, 2018 Report Share Posted October 2, 2018 1 hour ago, Lord Punkape said: Do you have any photos of your wife to post on here......? Admin could agree to a “Cuntscorner wifes” section. lol. This actually sounds quite sinister, P. Nocti, make sure you poof-proof your house tonight before going to bed. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jiggerycock Posted October 2, 2018 Author Report Share Posted October 2, 2018 23 minutes ago, Decimus said: This actually sounds quite sinister, P. Nocti, make sure you poof-proof your house tonight before going to bed tonight. There's a business opportunity for the feckless and the workshy! "Laminate your gaff, guv? The deluxe service involves removal of all pictures of Joan Crawford and Madonna, tubes of manglide and flock wallpaper. Tell you what, go for 've 'Gold' service an' I'll even euthanize your pug for you free ov charge. Can't say fairer than that." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
southerncunt Posted October 2, 2018 Report Share Posted October 2, 2018 3 hours ago, Lord Punkape said: Do you have any photos of your wife to post on here......? Admin could agree to a “Cuntscorner wifes” section. lol. You may even like to kick us off with a “cunts corner black cock lovers” section. Fucking LOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted October 2, 2018 Report Share Posted October 2, 2018 14 minutes ago, southerncunt said: You may even like to kick us off with a “cunts corner black cock lovers” section. Fucking LOL 'Playmate of the month is, Mr Kgabe Um Bongo. Likes; machetes, Toyota 4WD vehicles, Jesus, and underage white girls. Dislikes; Bathing, winter, black women. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubby Pecker Posted October 2, 2018 Report Share Posted October 2, 2018 3 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said: 'Playmate of the month is, Mr Kgabe Um Bongo. Likes; machetes, Toyota 4WD vehicles, Jesus, and underage white girls. Dislikes; Bathing, winter, black women. Don't dis my brutha @Eddie again... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
White Cunt Posted October 2, 2018 Report Share Posted October 2, 2018 12 hours ago, Lord Punkape said: Do you have any photos of your wife to post on here......? Admin could agree to a “Cuntscorner wifes” section. lol. “Thou shall not covet your neighbour’s wife”. Or Wives, you thicko. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penny Farthing Posted October 2, 2018 Report Share Posted October 2, 2018 8 hours ago, southerncunt said: You may even like to kick us off with a “cunts corner black cock lovers” section. Fucking LOL Punker's "wife" is his right hand. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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