Old Chap Raasclaat Posted May 10, 2021 Report Share Posted May 10, 2021 I am sure there are a fair few old cunts on here and we are all ageing but getting old is a right cunt isn't it? Wiry hairs growing out my ears, eyebrows, and nose, anywhere but my actual head. Groaning as you stand up, sometimes when you don't even need to. Feeling like a dirty old cunt when you look at 20 something ladies. Pissing more often. Getting bitter and hating the world and the cunts within it. Never mind eh, hopefully I won't be shitting the bed for at least 30 years. 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penny Farthing Posted May 10, 2021 Report Share Posted May 10, 2021 3 minutes ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said: I am sure there are a fair few old cunts on here and we are all ageing but getting old is a right cunt isn't it? Wiry hairs growing out my ears, eyebrows, and nose, anywhere but my actual head. Groaning as you stand up, sometimes when you don't even need to. Feeling like a dirty old cunt when you look at 20 something ladies. Pissing more often. Getting bitter and hating the world and the cunts within it. Never mind eh, hopefully I won't be shitting the bed for at least 30 years. You have never been decently drunk? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted May 10, 2021 Report Share Posted May 10, 2021 4 minutes ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said: I am sure there are a fair few old cunts on here and we are all ageing but getting old is a right cunt isn't it? Wiry hairs growing out my ears, eyebrows, and nose, anywhere but my actual head. Groaning as you stand up, sometimes when you don't even need to. Feeling like a dirty old cunt when you look at 20 something ladies. Pissing more often. Getting bitter and hating the world and the cunts within it. Never mind eh, hopefully I won't be shitting the bed for at least 30 years. It used to be a nice respectable area round here. You could leave your doors unlocked and not worry about intruders in your back passage. Some of these girls today only wash their nets once a day. Disgusting. I blame the darkies. I remember when all this was just fields. People were happier during the blitz. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hammer of Cunts Posted May 10, 2021 Report Share Posted May 10, 2021 14 minutes ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said: Getting bitter and hating the world and the cunts within it. That's what they call "woke" isn't it? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hammer of Cunts Posted May 10, 2021 Report Share Posted May 10, 2021 8 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said: You could leave your doors unlocked I never lock my house (I'm old and might lose the key) and the door locks on my car don't work. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Last Cunt Standing Posted May 10, 2021 Report Share Posted May 10, 2021 1 hour ago, Eric Cuntman said: It used to be a nice respectable area round here. You could leave your doors unlocked and not worry about intruders in your back passage. Some of these girls today only wash their nets once a day. Disgusting. I blame the darkies. I remember when all this was just fields. People were happier during the blitz. And another thing...carrots don’t taste like carrots anymore, you can’t buy decent slacks like you used to, and it’s all coffee shops and charity shops on the high street nowadays, no decent iron monger to get a tuppeny bag of nails...I was saying to our Tony only yesterday it’s a full twenty years since Hutchinsons closed down, they used to sell toffee under the counter to regulars in the war...I remember coming off the 24 bus...or was it the 25....went down Byford Street past the Methodist church...it’s a Muslim carpet shop now....magic carpet shop our Tony calls it..hahahah..... I miss this stream of consciousness bollocks some of the old dears would keep going with. Occasionally I would set them up on the exam couch, pop behind the curtain for my stethoscope and sit and have a coffee with the crossword while they waffle on. I think 20 minutes was my record. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
White Cunt Posted May 10, 2021 Report Share Posted May 10, 2021 2 hours ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said: I am sure there are a fair few old cunts on here and we are all ageing but getting old is a right cunt isn't it? Wiry hairs growing out my ears, eyebrows, and nose, anywhere but my actual head. Groaning as you stand up, sometimes when you don't even need to. Feeling like a dirty old cunt when you look at 20 something ladies. Pissing more often. Getting bitter and hating the world and the cunts within it. Never mind eh, hopefully I won't be shitting the bed for at least 30 years. I get up and go upstairs to get A. Get upstairs - no idea what I came here for. Look around. Another idea comes to mind. Take a B and go downstairs. Get downstairs, put down B. Pickup C and go to the back of the utility room. Pick up D and go upstairs. Now I recall what I needed, pick up A and go downstairs. Repeat five times a day. I am fucked. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted May 10, 2021 Report Share Posted May 10, 2021 1 hour ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said: I am sure there are a fair few old cunts on here and we are all ageing but getting old is a right cunt isn't it? Wiry hairs growing out my ears, eyebrows, and nose, anywhere but my actual head. Groaning as you stand up, sometimes when you don't even need to. Feeling like a dirty old cunt when you look at 20 something ladies. Pissing more often. Getting bitter and hating the world and the cunts within it. Never mind eh, hopefully I won't be shitting the bed for at least 30 years. I found the older I've got the more I shout at the telly. I don't just mean when Castleford Tigers fuck up, but at adverts, the news and characters behaviour on a film "don't confess you silly cunt, they've got no evidence". Also mistakes on films "that didn't fucking happen" and I scrabble to get my phone to look at the IMDB 'goofs' section to see if someone's spotted it as well. Another worrying thing about aging is joining the National trust and walking around trust's gardens and looking at the flowers and plants and thinking 'ooh, that looks nice'. Now, where's that number for Wiltshire farm Foods brochure? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted May 10, 2021 Report Share Posted May 10, 2021 22 minutes ago, Last Cunt Standing said: And another thing...carrots don’t taste like carrots anymore, you can’t buy decent slacks like you used to, and it’s all coffee shops and charity shops on the high street nowadays, no decent iron monger to get a tuppeny bag of nails...I was saying to our Tony only yesterday it’s a full twenty years since Hutchinsons closed down, they used to sell toffee under the counter to regulars in the war...I remember coming off the 24 bus...or was it the 25....went down Byford Street past the Methodist church...it’s a Muslim carpet shop now....magic carpet shop our Tony calls it..hahahah..... I miss this stream of consciousness bollocks some of the old dears would keep going with. Occasionally I would set them up on the exam couch, pop behind the curtain for my stethoscope and sit and have a coffee with the crossword while they waffle on. I think 20 minutes was my record. It's a shame you can't write on their paper notes anymore. I remember F.O.S. for Constipation and DFK DFC (Don't Fucking Know, Don't Fucking Care) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
White Cunt Posted May 10, 2021 Report Share Posted May 10, 2021 10 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: I found the older I've got the more I shout at the telly. I don't just mean when Castleford Tigers fuck up, but at adverts, the news and characters behaviour on a film "don't confess you silly cunt, they've got no evidence". Also mistakes on films "that didn't fucking happen" and I scrabble to get my phone to look at the IMDB 'goofs' section to see if someone's spotted it as well. Another worrying thing about aging is joining the National trust and walking around trust's gardens and looking at the flowers and plants and thinking 'ooh, that looks nice'. Now, where's that number for Wiltshire farm Foods brochure? You may like "The Critical Drinker" on Youtube. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hammer of Cunts Posted May 10, 2021 Report Share Posted May 10, 2021 48 minutes ago, Last Cunt Standing said: I miss this stream of consciousness bollocks some of the old dears would keep going with A ninety-five year-old friend told me a while ago that, the day after George VI died, she noticed a pair of shops in town; the dressmaker was displaying a huge pair of purple knickers and the butcher's window was festooned with black puddings. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
southerncunt Posted May 10, 2021 Report Share Posted May 10, 2021 I look more like my avatar every day. I got on the piss over the weekend and when I rocked up to a job this morning, the manager said “Jesus, did you just fucking get up?” Yeah, getting older is great, and that’s just for the lucky ones. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dyslexic cnut Posted May 10, 2021 Report Share Posted May 10, 2021 School parent’s evening five years ago with Mrs Cnut and the Cnutlet. The history teacher says ‘it’s nice to see mum and grandad here, supporting you and showing an interest!’ Wtf? 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
and Posted May 10, 2021 Report Share Posted May 10, 2021 And the music was so much better when Glenn Miller was alive, before that rowdy young cunt Andy Williams came on the scene, fuck me, what a racket! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
colonelkurtz Posted May 10, 2021 Report Share Posted May 10, 2021 Dayglo pink football boots ... lahdee daah coffee .. piggin' sat navs . What's wrong with these people ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted May 10, 2021 Report Share Posted May 10, 2021 54 minutes ago, Joker said: And the music was so much better when Glenn Miller was alive, before that rowdy young cunt Andy Williams came on the scene, fuck me, what a racket! Yeah I agree, what with his song about mooning at a river. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cuntspotter Posted May 10, 2021 Report Share Posted May 10, 2021 28 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: Yeah I agree, what with his song about mooning at a river. Written by Henry Mancini...... a fabulous piano player and organist. https://youtu.be/x9-8Wxv6m2k 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted May 10, 2021 Report Share Posted May 10, 2021 3 minutes ago, cuntspotter said: Written by Henry Mancini...... a fabulous piano player and organist. https://youtu.be/x9-8Wxv6m2k Didn't his brother Terry play for QPR? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted May 10, 2021 Report Share Posted May 10, 2021 33 minutes ago, cuntspotter said: Written by Henry Mancini...... a fabulous piano player and organist. https://youtu.be/x9-8Wxv6m2k Back in the early '60s they used to play this, and similar, at my local cinema, before the film started. It used to get the girls in the mood for an up mini skirt groping, when the lights dimmed. My fingers still stink. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted May 10, 2021 Report Share Posted May 10, 2021 8 minutes ago, Witheredscrote said: Back in the early '60s they used to play this, and similar, at my local cinema, before the film started. It used to get the girls in the mood for an up mini skirt groping, when the lights dimmed. My fingers still stink. This is more you, bby xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubby Pecker Posted May 10, 2021 Report Share Posted May 10, 2021 53 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: Didn't his brother Terry play for QPR? His other brother won a few stages of the Tour de France Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProfB Posted May 10, 2021 Report Share Posted May 10, 2021 12 hours ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said: I am sure there are a fair few old cunts on here and we are all ageing but getting old is a right cunt isn't it? Wiry hairs growing out my ears, eyebrows, and nose, anywhere but my actual head. Groaning as you stand up, sometimes when you don't even need to. Feeling like a dirty old cunt when you look at 20 something ladies. Pissing more often. Getting bitter and hating the world and the cunts within it. Never mind eh, hopefully I won't be shitting the bed for at least 30 years. How old are you? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted May 10, 2021 Report Share Posted May 10, 2021 22 minutes ago, ProfB said: How old are you? How old are you ProfB? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProfB Posted May 10, 2021 Report Share Posted May 10, 2021 1 minute ago, Eric Cuntman said: How old are you ProfB? 57 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted May 10, 2021 Report Share Posted May 10, 2021 Just now, ProfB said: 57 You do seem to be full of beans. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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