Ronnie O'Sullivan

[Last Cunt Standing]

6 hours ago, Wolfie said:

Okay Eric: whose back doors get caved in first, those belonging to Vicki or Michaela?

And what about you, doc? 

Michaela used to flog frillies and dildos for Ann Summers, so is highly likely to be a depraved slut in the sack. I’m afraid it’s no contest with Vicki, who is disappointingly content with the metronomic fucking she undoubtedly gets off her robot of a husband. He probably dismounts after three minutes of thinking time and offers a re-rack, the cunt. 

[Eric Cuntman]

57 minutes ago, Last Cunt Standing said:

Michaela used to flog frillies and dildos for Ann Summers, so is highly likely to be a depraved slut in the sack. I’m afraid it’s no contest with Vicki, who is disappointingly content with the metronomic fucking she undoubtedly gets off her robot of a husband. He probably dismounts after three minutes of thinking time and offers a re-rack, the cunt. 

I'm fairly certain that foreplay for the Selbys involves Mark walking round the bed for 10 minutes, chalking his bellend with a vacant expression on his  face.

[Neil]

If ever there was a sport that would 'even up' the gender difference then snooker and darts are about as simple as it gets,It's hardly fucking hod carrying is it?. 3 little arrows and a wooden broom handle and the soppy fuckers still make it look like a blind spastic is trying to play it for the first time. Proof that vacuuming and pan handling is what they do best. They reckon our brains are in our cocks well their agility,skill and mentality is firmly up their jumpers.....and may I say some of them have lovely pairs of agility.

[Wolfie]

3 hours ago, Neil said:

If ever there was a sport that would 'even up' the gender difference then snooker and darts are about as simple as it gets,It's hardly fucking hod carrying is it?. 3 little arrows and a wooden broom handle and the soppy fuckers still make it look like a blind spastic is trying to play it for the first time. Proof that vacuuming and pan handling is what they do best. They reckon our brains are in our cocks well their agility,skill and mentality is firmly up their jumpers.....and may I say some of them have lovely pairs of agility.

Neil, I absolutely hate your fat fucking guts, from your devolved little brain to your gout-ridden feet, via your 52-inch waist, which you already know, though I've awarded a rare like for this comment because I reluctantly wholly agree.

Darts and snooker alike require extreme hand-eye coordination skills comprising sleight of hand, a deft touch, the ability to quickly deconstruct numbers under pressure, and concentration for long hours without talking. Mental endurance aside, physical strength is not required, which can therefore be attributed to the female genre's comparative limitations with sports such as rugby, football, mma, boxing etc. For these reasons, there is no excuse as to why women cannot compete at the same level as men with darts and snooker. Chess is also another noteworthy example. Your thoughts, please:

@Mrs Roops

@camberwell gypsy

And, on behalf of Fatima Whitbread, who further complicates the situation, @Dawn Chorus

[camberwell gypsy]

35 minutes ago, Wolfie said:

Neil, I absolutely hate your fat fucking guts, from your devolved little brain to your gout-ridden feet, via your 52-inch waist, which you already know, though I've awarded a rare like for this comment because I reluctantly wholly agree.

Darts and snooker alike require extreme hand-eye coordination skills comprising sleight of hand, a deft touch, the ability to quickly deconstruct numbers under pressure, and concentration for long hours without talking. Mental endurance aside, physical strength is not required, which can therefore be attributed to the female genre's comparative limitations with sports such as rugby, football, mma, boxing etc. For these reasons, there is no excuse as to why women cannot compete at the same level as men with darts and snooker. Chess is also another noteworthy example. Your thoughts, please:

@Mrs Roops

@camberwell gypsy

And, on behalf of Fatima Whitbread, who further complicates the situation, @Dawn Chorus

Deta Hedman and Fallon Sherrock have beaten men. Sherrock beat Mensur Suljovic when he was ranked number 5 in the world, to reach the third round of the PDC championship. So it is possible in darts. 

[Frank]

Extraordinary performance by the fat magician last night... every pot dead centre of the pocket.  I remember the days when Decimus used to hit the target with practically every single post! Now look at the state of the whiny "I really don't care' stupid little cunt. No doubt the idiot will pop out of the woodwork to call me old and tedious, or some other repetitive bollocks. 

That Rob Walker wanker stirring shit in the post-match interview should be shot. 

[Decimus]

17 minutes ago, Frank said:

Extraordinary performance by the fat magician last night... every pot dead centre of the pocket.  I remember the days when Decimus used to hit the target with practically every single post! Now look at the state of the whiny "I really don't care' stupid little cunt.

That Rob Walker wanker stirring shit in the post-match interview should be shot. 

I remember the days when you were still absolutely fucking awful, but didn't spend 9 out of 15 posts droning on about the most boring televised sport in broadcasting history.

You tedious old wanker.

[Frank]

2 minutes ago, Decimus said:

I remember the days when you were still absolutely fucking awful, but didn't spend 9 out of 15 posts droning on about the most boring televised sport in broadcasting history.

You tedious old wanker.

Come on, decs.. what's happened to you?

[Old Chap Raasclaat]

2 hours ago, Wolfie said:

and concentration for long hours without talking

On this alone women are destined for failure.

[camberwell gypsy]

4 minutes ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said:

On this alone women are destined for failure.

Helen Keller wouldn't have had a problem keeping quiet for long periods so she would be good at snooker.

However, being deaf as well as blind fucked up any chance of winning any world titles. 

[Decimus]

3 hours ago, Frank said:

Come on, decs.. what's happened to you?

Kids.

[Ape™️]

8 hours ago, Frank said:

Extraordinary performance by the fat magician last night... every pot dead centre of the pocket.  I remember the days when Decimus used to hit the target with practically every single post! Now look at the state of the whiny "I really don't care' stupid little cunt. No doubt the idiot will pop out of the woodwork to call me old and tedious, or some other repetitive bollocks. 

That Rob Walker wanker stirring shit in the post-match interview should be shot. 

The magician should use some of his magical powers to move his face up approximately 2.613 cm relative to his skull. Stupid five-head cunt.
 

[Frank]

31 minutes ago, Ape™️ said:

The magician should use some of his magical powers to move his face up approximately 2.613 cm relative to his skull. Stupid five-head cunt.
 

I've been looking closely at Hendry this evening, Ape. Is he officially a mong?

[Ape™️]

1 hour ago, Frank said:

I've been looking closely at Hendry this evening, Ape. Is he officially a mong?

Not officially, but he certainly has some mong-like attributes. 

[The Beast]

Murphy is getting ground down by this boring bastard.

He needs to score more heavily when in tomorrow to have any hope.

[Stubby Pecker]

Selby sucks every ounce of enjoyment, thrill and adrenaline out of the game. In fact he does the same to life itself. Dour, emotionally devoid android of a human who needs a roughly broken cue shoved up his arse, splinters and all.

That said, I’d savagely pummel Hazel Irvines dung passage until my banjo string snapped then flip her over and yell “Geronimo” as I blasted a gallon of spaff up each equine sized nostril 

[Eric Cuntman]

9 minutes ago, Stubby Pecker said:

Selby sucks every ounce of enjoyment, thrill and adrenaline out of the game. In fact he does the same to life itself. Dour, emotionally devoid android of a human who needs a roughly broken cue shoved up his arse, splinters and all.

That said, I’d savagely pummel Hazel Irvines dung passage until my banjo string snapped then flip her over and yell “Geronimo” as I blasted a gallon of spaff up each equine sized nostril 

She is a lovely little thing. Whenever the snooker is on, she becomes the second most shaggable female that features in my warped psyche. The number one spot is, as usual, occupied by Jacqueline Pearce out of 'Blake's 7'.

[Stubby Pecker]

1 minute ago, Eric Cuntman said:

She is a lovely little thing. Whenever the snooker is on, she becomes the second most shaggable female that features in my warped psyche. The number one spot is, as usual, occupied by Jacqueline Pearce out of 'Blake's 7'.

Joking aside, she actually speaks with knowledge and gravitas unlike the modern trend of dolly birds and quota filling splitarses. Gabby Logan is another who knows what she’s talking about 

[Ape™️]

12 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

She is a lovely little thing. Whenever the snooker is on, she becomes the second most shaggable female that features in my warped psyche. The number one spot is, as usual, occupied by Jacqueline Pearce out of 'Blake's 7'.

A lovely little thing?

[Eric Cuntman]

2 hours ago, Ape™️ said:

A lovely little thing?

Yes Ape, she is a lovely little thing. And I would like to do all rude things and stuff to her. I really don't see what business it is of yours.

[Goober]

14 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Yes Ape, she is a lovely little thing. And I would like to do all rude things and stuff to her. I really don't see what business it is of yours.

Paste that on the back of your eyelids, Eric. 

[Eric Cuntman]

1 minute ago, Goober said:

Paste that on the back of your eyelids, Eric. 

Innit blud.

[Frank]

1 hour ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Yes Ape, she is a lovely little thing. And I would like to do all rude things and stuff to her. I really don't see what business it is of yours.

Creepy cunt.

[Eric Cuntman]

1 hour ago, Frank said:

Creepy cunt.

Why did you edit it 20 minutes after the original post?

I could tell from 'hmmm' that you're still peeved that I didn't pull the trigger with Spotto 2 weeks ago and get myself banned.

Transparent, over sensitive poof.

[Stubby Pecker]

4 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Why did you edit it 20 minutes after the original post?

I could tell from 'hmmm' that you're still peeved that I didn't pull the trigger with Spotto 2 weeks ago and get myself banned.

Transparent, over sensitive poof.

@Frank?